A New Loop
by KaiaLuna
Summary: War takes a dark turn, most die and those that survive are too broken to live, Harry and Hermione, most of all. They decide that winning isn't enough, they need to save who they can. Its worth the risk, to fix it or die trying. Now they're in the past and have to learn to let go of the future that will never be and learn to live, to love and to let the path of life change them all.
1. Chapter 1

**The first couple chapters are very dark. I need to break everyone so even though the outcome of the war is the same in the book, the cost came at a price to high, high enough they'd risk everything. To fix it or die trying. So the life they survive to live was worth living. So some lives weren't lost at all. They set out to stop a madman but this time, they were out to save the ones they loved and even some they despised. This time they didn't want to end a war they wanted to stop it. This time they wanted to saviors and not heroes.**

**I'm writing around not giving anything more than the outline away. So just note these chapters are very dark, the story becomes much lighter in later chapters, a story about friendship, family and love (lemons are likely in later chapters) though it starts dark and depressed with mention of violence, rape, addiction and suicide. **

**PLEASE NOTE THE M RATING. DARK BEGINNING LEMONS LATER!**

She let herself in with a nearly silent whisper of the door and stood a moment, taking in the scene, a low fire burning to provide a small bubble of warmth and light in the otherwise cold and dark library. A tray of food sat untouched on the coffee table, books were piled high beside the couch, one flipped over to keep the page as though its owner could return momentarily to it and she swallowed biting back the wave of anguish that always hit as she noted the empty chair set by the old chess set with pieces set as though to be played again but everything is coated in a sheen of dust. Two chairs set near, one opposite the chess set but facing the low fire, its occupant sitting with a half empty glass of whiskey, legs stretched out in front of him as he slouched staring sightlessly at the low fire and beside it another occupied chair, the girl in it curled tightly as she to stared unseeingly at the hearth.

A wave of her wand brought the fire to life, if they noticed, neither occupant of the room showed it. Another wave of her wand and the untouched tray was banished to the kitchen. With a last mournful look at the empty chair set by the chess set, waiting for her brother, she turned and as silently as she let herself in she let herself out and went down to the kitchen where her brother was preparing food and tippling from a large bottle of whiskey.

"How are you?" The question was whispered as though not to disturb the silence of the house.

Ginny shrugged and bit her lip forcing herself to swallow the lump in her throat. "George is better today. Lee got him to give an opinion about a problem with a product at the shop instead of just telling him to burn it down and Angelina got him to eat two full meals."

Bill gave a grim smile and looked his sister over, "How are _you_ Ginerva?"

Ginny shook her head and pulled in a breath, not today, the gesture said, I can't think about me today.

Bill nodded and turned away, fighting back the wave of tears, "Did you see Charlie today?"

"He's settling in at the reserve again but he sent an owl and said he'd arrived safe. I stopped in and saw dad at the ministry, he's… he…" Ginny stuttered as the tears burned her eyes and she choked back a wave of pain.

Bill nodded, knowing she needed him to ignore her agony and not coddle it. "Fleur extended her stay in France."

"Again." Ginny sighed, Bill just nodded, "Where's Victoire?"

"Andromeda has her and Teddy." He sent her a tight smile, his wife was suffering sever post partum and cried every time she looked at the infant. She'd tried to drown the little girl 'to save her from this terrible world' but Bill had come home early. After a month at the hospital her family had suggested she come home for a visit. It didn't look like she was coming back.

The door quietly clicked drawing their attention as steps shuffled down to the kitchen and Percy ghosted in, giving them a tight smile in greeting and picking up the whiskey bottle for a long tipple.

"Perce?" The name was both a greeting and a question. Percy just shook his head, gave a grim smile to his baby sister and left the room, carrying the bottle by its neck as he shuffled up the steps to the room he called his own.

"I'll start on supper." Ginny turned absently to the stove, her hands shaking as she began to prepare food no one would really eat.

"I better check on dad." Bill sighed and patted her shoulder before heading up the steps. His father had a mattress in what had been his shed before the Burrow had been blown up. Inside, had once been clean if cluttered with various muggle artifacts, which now sat abandoned and strewn with unwashed clothes, empty whiskey bottles lay strewn across the floor and one, half full one was clutched in his fathers hands as he slept, its contents dripping onto the mattress.

Bill picked up as best he could, not bothering to be quiet, nothing would wake his father at this stage and it was so quiet at Grimmauld Place it was like the whole place would shatter if a sound was made but sometimes he just wanted to sing at the top of his lungs and screw the delicate balancing act, let it all come down around them. Two of his brothers and his mother were dead, his father and middle brother were turning into alcoholics, his younger brother cursed any sort of reflective surface in violent fits of rage which were followed by days of apathy steeped in dreamless sleep potions. His closest brother, in both age and relation, avoided the family as though by not seeing any of them he could pretend everything was ok, that their mother was at home cooking for them, waiting to set him up with some eligible witch and harp on the dangers of his chosen profession. He was in such sever denial Bill wasn't actually sure Charlie didn't actually believe his family was home and still whole and healthy and happy. Bill himself was all but a single father to an infant girl he had no idea how to care for though he was fairly certain the only thing keeping him together was his baby sister. She seemed to be the thing keeping them all together but she was crumbling before his very eyes as she struggled to keep them all from drowning.

Back at Grimmauld Place, the quiet of the house was broken by screams. Hermione had drifted to sleep. Percy, lulled by the bottle didn't wake and Ginny just lay there listening, tears streaming down her face as she shut her eyes, wanting to scream as well, instead she mentally went through a complex recipe her mother had once taught her a long time ago. It didn't matter that no one ate, she cooked to be close to her mother, she cooked to keep busy to keep from thinking, from giving in to the grief and insanity waiting to embrace her, as it was her broken family.

Harry held Hermione to his lean frame, his grip almost to tight until her screaming and shaking subsided. Then he tucked her into his side as they sat before the dying embers of the fire.

"We can't do this anymore." He whispered to her. They only ever spoke to each other and only in the dark of night.

"I know." She agreed taking in a shaking breath and turning her head so the chessboard came into view. "I miss him so much."

"Me too." Harry agreed as he turned and frowned at the board. He remembered the last time he'd sat there, playing the game with Ron while Hermione read, enjoying a rare moment of reprieve, of peace before the Order meeting began.

So long ago, it was so very long ago, and yet it was only yesterday. He turned and caught sight of the books abandoned by Hermione when supper had been called by the Weasley matriarch, the woman who had quickly become mother to them all, who'd given her life protecting her family. Silence fell around them as they both lived in the memories again. Harry reached out for his wand and summoned a bottle of whiskey but her hand on his forearm stopped him from reaching to it to pour a glass.

"No more dreamless sleep My." He shook his head at her. "We've had to much." They rarely dulled the sharp pains of the horrors in their minds but when they did it was sparingly, a drop of potion or a tumbler of whiskey but no more. The potion made the nightmares worse the next night and the whiskey made them all the more real.

Hermione shook her head at him, "We can't do this anymore Harry. I can't."

Harry nodded and set the bottle aside pulling her tighter into his arms, "You have to, we have to." He waited for her to nod and poured her a tumbler full before taking one himself. "We have to remember, to share it all between us so we can have the strength."

"We make it better or die trying." She agreed with a grim smile.

All day they sat numb, drifting in and out of sleep, all night, staring into the flames of a dying fire, they sat huddled together and talked out the nightmares, reliving every memory from the now bitter and hard ache of past joy to the horrors of the war itself. It was the good memories that were the hardest, the dreams of the lives they almost had or saw a glimpse of or once hoped for. They had become accustomed to horror and pain but the happy memories, those hurt worse than the nightmares.

Harry started it tonight, "I dreamt of Sirius today…"


	2. Chapter 2

In the morning Ginny slipped into the room and saw them leaning against each other on the floor by the fireplace, the fire had died out and she could see a pale almost blue tint to Hermione's features as Harry held her to him both of them breathing even in sleep. She wanted to light the fire but was surprised that having stuck her head in the room, both of their breathing was still deep and even, she slipped back out, tiptoeing down the steps but Harry woke with a start that woke Hermione or perhaps it was the other way around as they bolted up right and glanced around them. Harry flicked his wand and lit the fire as Hermione stood and stretched before meeting his eyes. At his almost imperceptible nod she grimaced in place of a reassuring smile and they made their way out of the library. They took turns showering, Harry sat in the bathroom leaning against the tub as she went first, then wrapped in a towel she switched with him and put on lotion while he showered, turning her back when he stepped out to give him privacy to dress. Then they made their way down the stairs side by side. Though they seemed lost in their own world, they saw everything, constant vigilance, nothing happened near or around them they didn't know. The same could not be said for the other inhabitants of the house who stared at them in open-mouthed shock as they entered the kitchen; even Percy with his hangover lifted his head from the table and stared. Ginny dropped the mixing bowl of pancake batter and Bill sat with a bottle hovering over his daughter until she cried out a protest for it to be lowered enough to get her breakfast. This cry broke the stunned quiet of the room and Percy, blinked owlishly before dropping his head back to the table with a thunk.

No one said anything as the duo waved a wand at the mess from the bowl Ginny dropped, one cleaning up and the other repairing the dish. Neither spoke, they just seemed to know which spell to use to compliment each other's actions and wordlessly acted without a second thought. Then they moved around the kitchen making a pot of tea and breakfast before sitting at the table, a silent dance that couldn't have been more perfectly synchronized if professionals had choreographed it. Neither of them ate more than a few mouthfuls but it was something. Victoire finished her bottle and Bill burped her, his eyes not leaving his pseudo siblings once. Ginny had sat down and still seemed to be trying to teach herself to breathe normally, like she'd just heard angels sing or been told the zombie apocalypse had begun. Equal parts amazement and fear swirling in her eyes.

Without speaking Harry and Hermione left the room and as though the kitchen of Weasley's couldn't be more surprised, they left the house. Percy looked up again shook his head and looked at Bill, "I need to stop drinking." He shook his head, "I hallucinated Harry and Hermione having breakfast and going outside." Despite his words he'd summoned a bottle of whiskey and was throwing the contents down.

"Yeah." Bill nodded, patting his daughter on the back as she spit up. None of them knowing quite what else to say but hope and despair swirled inside Ginny, maybe the two heroes could start to heal, maybe they could all move past the horrors and the death. The torture Hermione had been subjected to, Harry and Ron listening to her screams unable to help; it had been nothing to having to watch, helpless as Greyback raped her. Harry and Hermione watching Ron, under the imperious, slit his own throat with the cutting curse. The things they had seen, that they had endured, she could only imagine, what they knew was… it defied thinking and she knew there was more, so much more they didn't know. She only knew about the rape because Hermione had held her as she cried after a Death Eater had assaulted and taken her prisoner, after she'd been attacked Hermione had healed her, put the pieces together. Bellatrix had laughed as her husband and brother-in-law had violated Ginny and the girl could still hear the mad cackles, feel their disgusting hands on her, but the trio had rescued her before… no one had rescued Hermione. Harry and Ron had been forced to watch, to hear her screams. No one protected the trio, no one saved them but they protected the world, saved them all and Hermione had helped her, talked to her, sat with her, handed over strength and love and healing as though the older witch had compassion and goodness to spare. It was all Ginny could do now to stay together, to help bring the two heroes a measure of peace, if not healing, for all they had done for the world, for all they had done for her.

Every day for a week Harry and Hermione got up and left the house from dawn until dusk, they ate a quiet breakfast and dinner with the Weasley's and then sequestered themselves in Hermione's old room for the night.

Three nights later, George set fire to the joke shop and laughed hysterically as fire works went off in every direction and flames rose to engulf the building in minutes. In his hand he held a mirror and turned to it to smile and laugh, "See it burn Freddie? Do you? See it, it's our masterpiece!"

"He was getting better!" Ginny raged at Lee as Angelina sobbed on the plastic chair in St. Mungos. "I saw him, everyday, _you_ saw him, he was getting better!" Lee tried to comfort her but she pulled away from him, biting back tears as she looked through the window into the long-term care unit where George was laughing at his reflection in the mirror. Bill arrived and led his sister away with a nod at the two people who'd loved his brother almost as much as he did, the ones who'd struggled daily to help him while they all drowned.

"Bill." Ginny bit back the wash of heated anguish.

Bill shook his head and hugged her, "I'm leaving Gin. I have to leave."

"Bill?"

"I can't raise an infant girl alone!" He shouts at her. Then shakes his head and looks away, "Fleur filed for divorce." He tells her and Ginny's already broken heart shatters more for her eldest brother. Bill does leave, Andromeda takes Teddy and goes with him to New Zealand, they all need a fresh start. Percy continues to drink and gets himself fired from the ministry for being blotto on the job. His mother died before he could make things right with her, Fred had died saving him and now the guilt was eating him alive but as he watched his sister moping up his vomit while the smell of fresh bread filled the kitchen of the near silent home something snapped in Percy and he picked her up in his arms and hugged her tightly before kissing her forehead and asking her to take him to the hospital.

"You want to go see George?" She asked him with a tired smile and dead eyes.

"I need help Gin." He told her shaking his head, "I can't sober up alone." Ginny bit her lip and hugged him tightly before pulling back and nodding. She stopped in to see George as she left her middle brother with the Substance Addicts Rehabilitation team. George was talking to himself about pulling a prank on a mediwitch when she looked in, he saw her and winked, "You wont say anything to mum will you Gin?" He turned to look beside him, "You know she wont say anything Freddie, Gin was always good to us."

Ginny nodded and swallowed back tears, "I won't tell." She forced a smile and let herself out of the room. On the way home she checked on her father, unlike Percy who had been somewhat functioning, self-hating alcoholic, and her father mixed whiskey with dreamless sleep or daydream potions and was rarely awake and never sober. She found him passed out, with a photo of her mother in his hand and a dreamy smile on his face as he muttered Molly Wobbles and moaned.

Ginny shook her head and waved her wand to tidy up a bit before setting some food down and placing a warming spell on it. Unlike the rest of the family, her father still actually ate the food she made. In his drunk and potioned haze she thought it might be his hallucinations of her mother that made him eat, as though Molly had cooked and was there with him. Ginny wasn't sure, she was just glad he was eating, even if he wouldn't sober up like Percy was trying.

Better. Ginny told herself in the mirror. The family was getting better. Charlie was clearly living in denial but he was a normally functioning human being and Bill was becoming one as well. George was worse but Percy was getting sober. Harry and Hermione were healing, they still didn't speak and their eyes were dead looking but they left the house. She didn't know where they went and they were never more than two feet from each other as though being separated would kill them but they were up and moving and even eating… a little. Things were getting better. Ginny kept telling herself over and over again. Things were getting better. She needed to be strong a while longer, she needed to hold it together just a little more and it would be better. Things were getting better. It had only been six weeks, six endless weeks, but six would turn to seven and then eight and they would start to heal, the war had only just ended, it had only been six little weeks. Every day she got up and several times a day she reminded herself, it was getting better. They would all start to get better.

She visited the hospital and her father everyday for three more days, then she found Arthur, overdosed on potions. She knew Bill and Charlie would come back for the funeral but George didn't seem to know what was going on around him in reality, living instead in a dream world with Fred and Percy would probably leave the hospital and start drinking again. Inside she found the house empty, 'one step forward ten steps back' they were all back sliding, they'd all keep flailing and falling until one by one, grief and nightmares took them all. Six weeks it had been six endless weeks. The war was over but the nightmare never stopped. Things didn't get better for them, only worse, even the good memories hurt. Even the good memories seemed to haunt, just another part of the unending nightmare. Things weren't better, nothing was better, none of them were ok, would ever be ok.

Ginny looked into the library to see if Harry and Hermione were back but the room was cold and empty, the books and chess set still waiting, covered in dust but right where the trio had left them, waiting for the trio to return. In the room she could almost feel the ghost of the warmth, hear the sounds of Harry and Ron playing chess and teasing Hermione as she flicked through one of the giant tomes while they waited for the rest of the Order to arrive. Fred and George would be making a racket elsewhere in the house and everything would smell like tea and fresh bread from her mothers cooking.

Ginny backed out as the memory assaulted her like a ghostly recounting of a scene that still waited to be played out in the house. Her face white and pain tearing through her she continued to back out and tripped, the portrait of Mrs. Black started screaming again and Ginny screamed with it, she let out the screams that had choked her for weeks, great wracking sobs convulsing her body until she couldn't scream anymore, couldn't cry anymore, could barely breathe.

Down in the kitchen, numb to the pain, with the ghosts of the past and future that would never be still taunting her along with the screaming of the portrait, Ginny raised a knife with her wand and drew it across her skin. Too much, it was too much, she wasn't strong, she wasn't good she didn't have compassion or love or light to share with the last remnants of her damaged family, of her broken soul. Finally though, the pain began to ease, flowing out of her with the red stream of her blood and in the warm dark consuming her senses she could see the sad faces of her friends and family, she could see her mothers arms open for a warm embrace, finally her pain could end and things would be better, everything could be better now, her mother was with her again.


	3. Chapter 3

Hermione and Harry held hands as they watched the tomb close over the casket of the girl they had loved. Another death, another person they failed to save, another nightmare.

Percy left the hospital only to get drunk, get in a terrible fight and end up back in the hospital. Charlie and Bill didn't come back. It was just Harry and Hermione standing over two fresh graves, surrounded by a field of others, every one they could name and picture in their mind, everyone they had known and if not loved than cared for. Even Draco Malfoy who's grave was four over and six down. He'd saved Hermione, not in time to protect her from Greyback's sexual assault but from being bitten or killed. He'd saved her, freed them and killed his own father. He'd not fought with them but had worked to help protect those he could, until Bellatrix had killed him. Narcissa had gone after her sister and in turn protected Harry, now she rested beside her son, in the field of war heroes, the cemetery of allies of the light. Beside her lay Severus Snape and next to him Luna Lovegood, Neville Longbottom, five Weasley's, Lavender Brown, Padma Patil, Justin Finch-Fletchy, Blaise Zabini, Dean Thomas, Katie Bell, Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks and so many more. Grave after grave the dates marking most as under twenty. Children, they had been, should have still been little more than children. Harry and Hermione were only eighteen. War heroes and they were still teenagers. Teenagers who'd buried everyone they'd ever loved or thought of as family, everyone but each other.

Harry linked his hand with hers and they walked away from the graves but standing outside the town house neither could make themselves enter.

"I never want to go in that house again." Hermione whispered. In her mind she could still see the blood on the kitchen floor, pool surrounding the beautiful red head whose face was oddly peaceful for the terrible scene.

"Me neither." Harry agreed, his one time love in his mind as well. He'd failed her. He'd loved her but he'd been unable to save her, to heal her, because he couldn't heal himself.

Silently they turned and walked away, no thought to gathering any belongings, they just walked away. For the next two weeks no one saw or heard from the duo, then a break in at the ministry threw the city into chaos.

The spell was complex and neither was completely sure it wouldn't just kill them, both were willing to take the risk, change the past or die trying that was their pact.

Ruins and spells, curses and wards the room was filled with magic. Hermione's nose began to bleed as she worked and Harry took her hand, their magic flowing together to protect them both or kill them both. Reaching hands out they touched either side of the veil, looked at each other and at the same time, they walked through.

Cold, dampness shivered through them and they felt sick as the worked pushed and pulled, twisted and shook them inside and out. It seemed like a long time passed in the dark and then images floated past, they hurt less than the pair might have expected, they talked about the memories so often. Ron's grinning face, Sirius's laughter, Draco's smirk, Ginny's eyes, Molly's hugs, memories flew around and through them, his and hers mixed until not even they knew which belonged to who. Finally it stopped, the spinning started then and they held each other's hands tighter. The blackness that encased them disappeared and they dropped, like stones to the ground.

Hermione and Harry stood and found themselves in the center of a stone circle.

"Stonehenge?" Harry asked her with a frown, noting the forest around them.

"No." Hermione confirmed, "I'm not sure where this is."

"Or when." Harry teased. He felt lighter and frowned at her in wonder.

"I know." She whispered, as though it were a spell she was afraid to break, "I remember everything but it's…"

"Someone else's life." He nodded in agreement, understanding her without words.

Hermione lifted her wand and waved a quick spell, "It's not far enough." She told him sadly.

"Not to kill the little brat in his crib but could you really do it anyways?" Harry responded, oddly rational.

"Early enough he's not in power though?"

"Maybe not but early enough to save most." Harry swallowed, "To save…"

"Your family." Hermione smiled at him sadly.

"Them, maybe but you know the cost of this adventure."

"We're never born." She doesn't need to say it but she does anyways.

"Do you suppose it hurts?" He asks with a frown, "Do you suppose if we're never born that we aren't alive to unmake the past and it all happens anyways?"

"If we aren't here to unmake the past then we would be born and nothing would change."

"It's a catch twenty two." He repeats, the discussion has been repeated so many times in the last weeks they know the words as if it were a script.

"We aren't born Harry but we don't get… unmade."

"So it's an alternate universe and our still exists?"

"It loops, into this one." Hermione assures him, "Time isn't exactly linear, it can loop back on itself, that's what we've done, a second us won't be born but the timeline is already changed along a completely new path."

"I know." He smiles at her, "I just feel better hearing you tell me."

"I know." She shakes her head at him, smiling back.

"So." He sighs, "First things first."

"We somehow get a place as seventh years at Hogwarts without letting anyone know we're from the past."

"Right, we have to be especially careful with Dumbledore."

"You really don't trust him?"

"He created child soldiers My, whatever his reasoning, whatever the prophecy, he manipulated us all. I don't think he's dark or evil but he's not as light and perfect as we wanted to believe."

"No and he's not all powerful either." Hermione reminds him, "We'll be okay Harry, no one will know where… when, we've come from."

The old conversation run its course, they both felt better and Harry took her hand as she waved her wand to adjust their style the little robe fashion had changed and he apparated them to Diagon Alley.

In her purse was everything they needed and before long, the 'twins' had met with various officials at the ministry and finally the headmaster of Hogwarts himself. In a few weeks time they were to be homeschooled transfer students. Both had passed the examinations they'd been required to take with such skill that many of the examiners were suggesting the pair could O all the NEWT exams or at least E them then and there.

The 'twins' purchased everything they would need for the year at school and many things they would need for the _extracurricular_ project they plotted. Namely, saving those they knew had been threatened and forced into loyalty to the dark and all those who had fought and died for the light.


	4. Chapter 4

They were early for the train, stopping for tea in muggle London before heading the platform, trying to prepare themselves for the memories to come and the faces they were sure to see as much as for the absence of faces their minds and hearts still told them they should see.

Shouts of _Hey Potter!_ Didn't really register as they moved towards the train.

"PRONGS!" The boy caught up to his friend and yanked at his shoulder.

Harry spun, wand already raised and a spell on his lips. He was prepared. He thought he was prepared. He stood, staring at the man across from him, the younger, healthier, smiling, alive, Sirius Black. He wasn't prepared.

"Harry?" Hermione's hand at his elbow jolted him back to reality and he shot her a grateful smile.

"Har…" Sirius cut off mid confused question as he got a good look at the girl standing with his best mate. Long brown hair fell in waves to her waist, her tiny waist, that rounded in delicate hips and became mile long legs. Trailing his eyes back up her petite form he wondered how someone so small could have such long legs, up her graceful neck to a perfect pout of natural pink lips and cheekbones so defined he wanted to lick one and her eyes, furious, brilliance shining like a furnace. It was only a few seconds to peruse her but his admiration was clear as he licked his lips, lifted an arrogant brow and smirked at her, "Hello Kitten."

A painful wave shot through Hermione, her Sirius had called her that too.

It was Harry to react this time as he lifted his wand again and took a slight step forward, angling his body in front of hers, "Eyes off my sister."

"Sister?" Sirius shook his head and frowned at his best mate in shock, "What are you on about mate? Where are your parents? Your mum never forgets to bring me treats for the train and I didn't get my kiss on the cheek good luck from her and my behave but have loads of fun from your dad." He frowned at his friend, looking at the wand and back up, then he met the eyes, brilliant green, not chocolate brown and his frown deepened, "Oi, what's the matter with your eyes?" He glares harder and shakes his head, "I'd swear my eyes were cursed to see you and you aren't you or something mate."

Hermione pulled Harry's arm back and he dropped his wand, "I think you're mistaken, my brother and I don't know you."

Sirius looked between the two of them with a confused frown, "Well who are you then? I think I'd have notice the complete doppelganger of my best mate walking around before but you two aren't firsties."

"We transferred in." Harry told him, "I'm Harry, this is my sister Mya and we haven't seen anyone who looks like me walking around so if you'll excuse us, we'd like to get seats on the train."

"Yeah, uh, sure mate." Sirius shook his head, still not quite believing his eyes, "Oi, uh, I'm Sirius Black."

"Nice to meet you." Hermione gave him a tight smile and they both turned, boarded the train and quickly found a compartment.

Hermione curled up and read while Harry flicked his wand in agitated boredom, "Does it feel like he'll walk in here any minute to you?" Hermione didn't need to ask who as her eyes lifted off the page, tears burning in their depths as she nodded.

He took the book from her lap and began reading it aloud while she curled back up and listened. A small boy snuck into the cabin a little later and Harry's wand was instantly pointed at the intruder. His mind registered the scared eleven year old and he quickly apologized, lowered his wand and glanced at Hermione's sleeping form.

"Sorry." He smiled at the boy.

"I didn't know anyone was in here, everywhere is full and I don't know anyone, I thought it was empty here."

"It's ok." Hermione offered sleepily, sitting up, "You can sit here with us if you like.

"I didn't mean to wake you up." The boy blushed, noticing the pallor of her skin and light bruising under her eyes.

"That's ok." She smiled warmly at him and Harry sank back down into his seat picking up the copy of Hogwarts: A History he had been reading to her before she drifted off.

"I love that book!" The boy grinned happily. Harry shook his head and chuckled as Hermione agreed with him but at her teasing glare he grinned and shrugged and began to read it to them both until once again, Hermione relaxed into sleep. Then he handed the book to the boy with a finger to his lips indicating they should try to be quiet. The boy nodded solemnly and opened to book to read to himself.

Back on the platform Sirius saw his best friend, almost brother, and this time he was sure it was him because he stood with his parents.

"Bout time Padfoot!" James called cheerfully, "Mum and dad were about to leave!"

"Not without a goodbye though right Mrs. P!" Sirius trotted over and right into the woman's warm embrace.

The woman leaned back with a smile and kissed his temple, "Have a good year my second son." She pulled away and handed him a sac he knew was filled with treats and hugged her again tighter. "I'll see you both at the holidays." She laughed kissing each boy on the cheek, grateful her son and pseudo son weren't like so many teens, too cool for their parents to still see them off on the train or embarrassed to be hugged. Sirius seemed to shine as he shared affection, like all the other students should be embarrassed because their mothers didn't hug them goodbye at the station. His love of parental affection had led her son to hang on to his childlike sense of joy at seeing his parents or getting hugs as well. This was evident as both boys hugged her husband who admonished them to be good in one breath and then with a twinkle in his eye told them to have fun. Then Sirius kissed one of her cheeks, James the other and the boys were waving backwards as they jogged onto the train to find their other friends. Neither Potter realized it was the last they would see the boys as they happily waved them off but Dragon Pox would claim them both in the coming months. At this moment, they waved off their son and adopted son, clasped hands, wrapped in the warmth and joy that always came from the open affection the two boys bestowed on them.

On the train Sirius glanced one last time out at the Potters and grinned sending a wave, not for the first time imagining they were his real parents and James was his real brother. "Oi!" the thought reminded him as he popped back in the doorway.

"What?" James popped his head out the door and waved a last time, watching his parents' grin and turn, having waited for the customary last wave before going home.

"I saw your twin today."

"Huh?"

"No kidding, the guy is almost identical to you mate. I swore it was you, my heart even cracked a little thinking your parents didn't wait to say goodbye to me since I wasn't with you this morning. I mean Moony and I got here and he's already on the train and I looked and looked but didn't see you and then I did and went chasing after you because you ignored me and it wasn't even you!" Sirius was ranting and gesturing like a mad man as they entered their compartment.

"What happened?" Remus looked up from his book mildly amused as his two friends entered the compartment. James looking bewildered and Sirius was either over excited or panicking, possibly both.

"James has an evil doppelganger with a knockout sister!" Sirius practically shouted as he dropped into a seat across from his second best friend."

Remus lifted an eyebrow and looked at his two friends in question, "How do you know he's evil?"

"Doppelgangers are always evil." Sirius shrugged.

Remus and James both sputtered out laughs and shook their heads. "I don't think that's true." James chuckled.

"It's not." Remus agreed, laughter in his eyes.

"Either way, the guy is _exactly_ like you, but for the eyes, he's got green eyes but the messy hair, even the glasses! They're the same height and build, they have the same frown, everything!"

James snorted and rolled his eyes, "I'm sure he's not exactly like me."

"All but the eyes!" Sirius insisted. "I swear it took me an age to realize he really wasn't you!"

The boys settled down and Peter scurried in, by this time the boys had moved on to another topic but it was quickly turned back to the mysterious siblings as he huffed into a seat just before the train jolted forward.

"Did you hear we have home schooled transfers in for their final year?" Peter grinned, thinking he'd be the center of attention with this new gossip, his friends would focus on him and his summer and include him in plots for the new year and getting to know the new students, deciding to be nice or prank them, musing on the house they'd get in. He grinned in glee.

"Twins." Remus nods, immediately deflating Peter as his friends immediately began talking about a topic they'd clearly already started, and abandoned, before he'd arrived only to now pick up without back tracking to fill him in.

"She's an eleven out of ten, sexy and small and smart, I see smart in those eyes."

"You see smart?" Remus snorted at his friend's words.

"Yeah."

"Does she look like me to?"

"You would not make an eleven girl Prongs, a three maybe four." Sirius laughed.

"I'm shocked you've thought enough to rate him." Remus teases.

"Don't be jealous, you'd be a six Remus, not a bad bird at all."

"I don't know if I should hex you or not." Remus chuckled shaking his head.

"Clearly I'd be gorgeous male or female but this girl, this girl is… lovely."

"Lovely?" The boys lifted brows at him in mock teasing.

"Shut it." Sirius snorted.

"I can't believe you confused the brother with James."

"I swear they're identical!"

Eventually the conversation turned to the boys' summer but Sirius had spent the last three weeks with Remus and all the summer before that with James, two weeks Remus had been with them as well. Peter had only seen them twice but hadn't much exciting to tell them about his summer though they had several fun stories that only seemed to exclude him a bit in the retelling. Eventually James went to Headboy duties, Sirius took a nap and Remus focused on his texts leaving Peter to snack on his box of Bertie Botts and stare out the window. When James got back they'd talk pranks and he'd be included, or classes or professors or other students. They were back to Hogwarts and he was one of them there, he was a Marauder, not left out or forgotten but included and listened to, when they weren't talking about or chasing girls anyways.

James wandered the cabin twirling his wand as he thought about the Headgirl; absently making sure everything on the train was ok. All the older students were fine and the younger ones were looked in on by the Prefects so he had a check of the mid years to make sure no one was causing trouble or in trouble but all was quiet. Until he saw a boy angrily shoving at Peter, "YOU DON'T TOUCH HER!" The boy seemed near tears, as he turned to… _himself?_ Holy sweet mother of Merlin Sirius was serious! This guy was his complete and exact match. "I'm sorry." The boy sniffled, "I was real quiet and letting her sleep and you trusted me to watch her for just a minute and then _HE_ woke her up and grabbed at her and I don't know any hexes but she was _brilliant_!" A petite girl stepped into the door of the cabin and knelt down talking softly to the boy. He nodded and followed her back inside.

James watched as Peter looked nervously at him or his replica and apologized, "Just stay away from her, don't ever touch her." He heard himself hiss before shoving past Peter and disappearing into the compartment with the slam of the door.

"Peter?" James called his friend over and Peter practically ran with bugged eyes.

"Blimely James! He's you!"

"I saw that." James nodded, "What the hell was that about?"

"Sirius was sleeping and Remus was reading some text and I ran out of Bertie Botts so I came looking for the cart and saw you and tripped and then the compartment opens and this kid looks out and tells me to be quiet and he's a little brat firstie so I hex him a little to teach him manners and she is like some avenging angel but freezes when she looks at me so I grab her and the next thing I know I'm wandless and stuck to the wall, there is murder in her eyes and the kid is telling me not to touch her and you walk up and I beg you to help but you look ready to hex me and then I see your eyes aren't your eyes and I'm really scared but then she takes the angry little brat into the compartment and the not you, you tells me to stay away from her and now you're here!" Peter lets out in a rush.

"Go back to the compartment." James tells his over excited friend; sometimes it was hard to believe his forth-best friend was really a Gryffindor.

After Peter disappears down the corridor he knocks on the compartment and pulls open the door. The younger boy is glaring at him from where he was playing cards with the girl and the girl is looking up at him with a warm smile but its his doppelganger he can't stop staring at.

"You aren't evil are you?" He blurts out.

Harry laughs at his father and shakes his head, "No, are you?"

"No." James chuckles. "But Merlin's Balls you really are my doppelganger. I didn't believe Sirius when he told me."

"We do look remarkably alike."

"I'd swear we were twins separated at birth if I didn't know my parents so well."

"Yeah." Harry bit back a laugh, "This is my twin Hermione."

"Mya." Hermione smiles warmly at him and he shoots her a grin.

"James." He sweeps into a flirty bow, "Headboy, Gryffindor and infamous Marauder, an unofficial, official prankster masters club, founded and reigned over by myself and my best mates." He turned back to his image, "Please, please tell me you do pranks, my head is swimming with all the fun we can have. Merlin but you have to be a Gryffindor!"

Harry and Hermione both laughed and shook their heads, "We'll have to wait and see." Hermione offered.

Harry grinned "I guess if we aren't you'll know if I'm evil or not."

"Fair point my new friend, if you are a Slytherin you will be my new nemesis, if you're a Gryffindor, we shall have more fun than the Professors can handle!"

James stayed with them a while longer and then made his way back to his compartment, completely forgetting he had gone in to defend his friend, Peter might have thrown the first hex but he was a bit weak and clumsy and they had to make sure everyone knew he was not to be picked on or the Marauders would make you pay. Ah well. James mentally shrugged. He didn't see a mean bone in either twin, it was a misunderstanding and he was sure it would be glossed over easily.

Harry and Hermione got their own private carriage after waving their new friend Owen off with the first years and wishing him luck for the ceremony. At the castle a Professor they didn't recognize from their time led them to the head table and Dumbledore greeted them with a smile.

"Before our new first year students join us, I'd like to welcome Harry and Hermione James."

Sirius spewed pumpkin juice across the table, "James, his last name is your first name and you're identical!" He hissed. James nodded in stunned silence. "You are identical James's." Remus chuckled and shook his head quietly shushing his friends and trying to listen to his headmaster.

"… homeschooled the pair are joining us for their final year and to write the NEWTS." Clearly they'd missed some of what had been said as McGonagall brought out the hat.

Hermione had insisted they couldn't use her last name and there wasn't a question about them using his so they'd settled on middle names, both starting with a J he still pushed for hers but Hermione insisted James was a better surname than Jean and she'd better remember it than he would, which had also been an argument against using Granger because he'd always expect anyone using it to be speaking to her. They stood, looking out over the crowd, eyes lingering on familiar faces as they half listened to Dumbledore introduce them and call for the hat so they could be sorted.

_Interesting._ The hat deliberated on his head. _What a curious mind. What a unique history. What a divided and diverse personality. You'd do well as a… not a Slytherin hey? I see the boy you were so against it, unsure now though are you? Yet your heart is still strong and pure, damaged yes but so much bravery and brashness yet lives in you. A Gryffindor true and through. _Harry wondered why the hat was still in his mind; outwardly silent instead of booming it's decision. _All my years, all my lifetimes as this hat, this isn't the first loop I've lived. Listen to caution and remember my words, forget the future, it is past, live for today and let go the fear. You are Harold James twin to Hermione, you do not know the future any more than the rest, but you have powerful knowledge and powerful magic, be careful not to lose the goodness in your heart, your greatest challenge is yet to pass for it isn't in war but in life. Live well and full and trust in your heart, you are through and through a true _"GRYFINDOR!" The hat shouted out.

James jumped up grinning clapping and stomping his feet as the rest of the table stomped their feet and slapped the table.

Sirius was standing as well, clapping and laughing, "TWO JAMES GRYFINDORS!"

Harry shook his head and grinned at them squeezing Hermione's hand as they passed he stopped where they had stood at the front of the room waiting for her instead of joining his table. For a moment the room just watched him, cheers at the table quieting, as he didn't join them. James and Sirius frowned and looked from him to each other. Had no one warned them they might be in separate houses? The boys sank down a bit concerned but focus on the girl who'd sat at the chair and then turned to tell her hesitant professor she was ready.

"Right." McGonagall turned her attention from boy to girl; they had to realize they might be in a different house… right?

The hat settled on her head, _Such brilliance. You could so easily have been a Ravenclaw then as now, and your heart so full and warm is Badger at its core. As he could have been other so too could you but no, your soul is a Lion's, your place beside his, from then to now, siblings in heart and soul if not in blood. Be careful though the damaged spot in your heart, rising and twisting and dark. Do not be afraid of life or love. Embrace the future for all you have known is past and you cannot know what is to come. A loop in time a bond forged between you two closer than family, remember his life is yours and yours is his, one cannot live where the other does not. Live in darkness and forward will rise darkness, live in light and love will reign. Balance the world as you balance each other. Forgive past sins not yet committed, they can still be saved, so many dark souls made light again and so many light alive to love again. Remember your mind is Raven, your heart is Badger but your soul is forever _"GRYFINDOR!"

Hermione bounced off the chair and took Harry's hand; the Gryffindor table had gone wild with applause as they took seats near the Marauders. Minds on the words of the hat, they communicated the concern and confusion of its words with a momentary look passed as they smiled and listened to the introductions around them and then the sorting and the feast. Neither slept well, it was their first night alone since… neither could remember.


	5. Chapter 5

Hermione woke with the first gray light of dawn and slipped quietly out of the room into the bathroom. Showered, dressed and ready for the day with the sun barely over the horizon she slipped down the steps to the common room where Harry was already sat, messy hair still damp, waiting for her.

Making their way out of the common room, they walked down and into the great hall. It was to early for breakfast to be served and as they sat tiredly leaning against each other and discussing their first or in some cases, second, impressions of the people they had met and of the school itself. They had moved on to wondering about professors and classes when another person moved into the Great Hall and came over to them.

"It's very early."

They both looked up and Hermione offered a smile, "Yes Professor, Harry and I are used to early mornings."

"Tea?" She offered as a fresh pot appeared on the table. "Those of us professors up and eating early have a smaller selection for breakfast but there are no rules about students not being up or eating as well, so come up and get a plate from our table."

"Thank you." Harry held out his hand to help Hermione to her feet and they followed her to the head table to get buttered toast with bacon and some fruit.

"Thank you." Hermione repeated as they returned to sit at their table and pour cups of tea from their pot.

"She's staring." Harry whispered.

Hermione shrugged, "Have you ever known a student to be up and down for breakfast at six before?"

"Fair point. I suppose we're already anomalies being transferred in, we'll have to be more careful not to draw attention."

"We're fine, Harry." She promised, placing the rest of her bacon buttie on his plate. "You'll need to build up strength for Quidditch" she explained at his concerned frown, "I've had enough honest." Harry nodded but slipped some of his fruit onto her plate anyways.

As the first trickle of students came in for breakfast Professor McGonagall approached them again, this time to hand them each a class schedule. Thanking her they poured another cup of tea and looked them over. They were both taking, DADA, Charms, Transfiguration, Potions and Herbology, in addition Hermione was taking Arithmancy and Ancient Runes. While Harry hoped to play Quidditch again, or rather Hermione was pushing him to play Quidditch again. The sport not only helped to keep his reflexes strong but had always been something he enjoyed and they needed to try to learn to live again. First up they had double Transfiguration but with over an hour to spare they folded the pages and headed out to the lake for fresh air.

Transfiguration and Charms both went by quickly. They'd hurried into Transfiguration just as class was starting; McGonagall let the near tardy arrival slide as they were 'new' and not expected to know their way around. James and the other marauders approached them as class finished though.

"Oi, you lot were gone early this morning."

"Or you lot just slept like lazy gits leaving barely enough time for breakfast." A student they didn't know teased the boys.

"Shut it Longbottom!" Sirius shouted back grinning, "Come and meet James two point oh."

"Oi." James frowned, "He's not a newer version!"

Hermione and Harry both smirked a little at that, listening to the boys banter as they led them to the charms room. Though questions were tossed at them, they were saved from speaking much as the boys mostly talked on top of each other or to students who passed by and quickly they were seated in Charms with attention on their tasks. So it was, Harry and Hermione were carried through to lunch without really saying much at all simply watching and analyzing everything around them.

At lunch they were surrounded by a cacophony of noise, luckily for Hermione, most of the attention was focused on Harry and largely by the marauders, who were all focused on him and James being doppelgangers. They asked a few questions but seemed to readily accept that the twins had been homeschooled, only coming to finish their final year before writing NEWTs, once the word circulated that their parents were both dead little was asked or said. Instead they talked about Hogwarts, each other and the other houses and pranks they had pulled and could pull with two copies of James.

"Nutters aren't they?" A quiet voice asked sitting next to Hermione.

"Possibly certifiable." Hermione offered back, a true smile lighting her features as she watched Harry forget himself for the first time since… third year if not longer, and just be young and carefree.

"I'm Lily." The girl offered as she filled her plate.

At the name Hermione turned to look at the girl, her smile was less broad but still warm, "Mya."

"Are you settling in ok? James and I were asked to make sure you were both adjusting to school and the castle ok." She rolled her eyes as an excited gesture from Sirius sent a sandwich flying into a bowl of soup that splattered Remus as they crowded Harry. "He seems to have actually taken to the task with your brother."

Hermione snorted and nodded, "They're going to get into trouble this year, I can feel it."

"Is your brother big on pranks?"

"Some, he's not opposed to rule breaking at any rate."

"Name five adventures I've ever been on or rules I've broken without you by my side." Harry challenged with a laugh before his focus returned to the boys and he through a bit of crust at a boy she didn't recognize, "Stop ogling my sister." The boys face flushed brilliant and he grumbled looking at his soup.

"Can I ogle her?" Sirius teased, "Cause honestly its hard not to."

"Don't blame me if she hexes your bullocks off." Harry responded.

"She'd do it too." Peter huffed.

"You don't even look at her." Harry hissed back. Hermione's gentle touch to his arm eased the tension and crackling anger almost instantly.

After a quick awkward moment, Sirius broke the tension, "QUIDDITCH!"

At everyone's attention he shook his head, "We haven't talked Quidditch, do you play? James is a star chaser but he's almost as slick a seeker and that's where we need him. Pete tried out for keeper once." Sirius snorted a laugh, "Now he helps with our equipment. I'm a beater and Remus is our cheerleader."

"Bite me." Remus rolled his eyes.

"I'm a seeker." Harry told them.

"A brilliant seeker." Hermione added.

"From the girl who reads through all but a minute or two of the matches." Harry teased.

"It's all I need to see to know you're ok and going to win." She shot back with an eye roll.

"Not a Quidditch fan?" Lily asked with a laugh.

"No." Hermione shook her head, "You?"

"I can't play at all but I love the games. Alice is our chaser, Frank is the other beater but our spares and other chasers left last year. James is captain and the rest of them are pretty sure to keep our spots but Harry should try out."

Talk focused on Quidditch and Hermione turned her attention away again, picking at her food. They headed off to potions and took a table together both rolling their eyes as Slughorn entered.

"Well well." He grinned rubbing his hands together, "Welcome to potions. I hear you both did excellent on the OWLs, however, I think it might be better to get you all caught up with partners who've been in the class before. Let's see, Mr. Potter you and Mr. Black aren't allowed together in this class, one of you go with… no no, I don't think that will do." He chuckled, "My my you two are quite alike aren't you. So, Mr. James work with Mr. Black, Mr. Potter and Ms. Evans as Head boy and girl I think you'll fit nicely and Ms James you may work with Mr. Snape."

"HE'S A SLYTHERIN!" Sirius shouted angrily.

"And they have uneven numbers as do the Gryfindors, Mr. Snape and Ms. James will work together and as he is my best student I'm certain he will be able to help Ms. James get caught up. If you are unequal to the task for Mr. James I will have him work with Ms Evans and you may work with Mr. Lupin and Mr. James may work with Mr. Pettigrew. Now if there are no more objections, please move to your seats and we'll get started."

James shot Sirius a dirty look and Sirius sighed, "I'll work with James Two… uh Harry James I mean."

He got up and stopped Hermione as she moved to the front; "If he tries anything we'll hex him so bad he never shows his face in class." His hissed quietly sending an evil look at Snape.

Hermione shook her head and took her seat, giving a quick reassuring look to Harry and rolling her eyes at James's wide grin as he sat next to Lily. She had to bite back a laugh at the red heads suffering look.

"Hello." Hermione whispered bracing herself as she turned to look at her former professor.

Snape gave a curt nod and kept his attention on the board as Slughorn began his lecture and wrote up a potion.

"I'll get the ingredients." She offered as the lecture concluded and they were told to begin brewing.

Snape gave her another curt nod, "Make sure they're good and bring some dried elephant skin with the jobberknoll feathers."

Hermione opened her mouth to tell him the potion didn't ask for elephant skin but remembering who she was partnered with she quickly shut her mouth and retrieved the ingredients for the memory potion.

Snape had everything set up and ready when she returned and they worked carefully and quietly together. Hermione stopped her own work only to watch him grind the dried elephant skin into a power and sprinkle it over the feathers. He dipped the feathers in and stirred three times clockwise, six counter clockwise and once clockwise before dropping the feather in. Once this was done she watched the potion another moment before finishing her own task, checking the time, watching him begin stirring and then carefully adding her mixture. As she poured and he stirred the potion began to turn color. He stopped stirring and they waited for it to cool before bottling it and cleaning up.

"You didn't ask about the elephant skin." He demanded as they sat after finishing.

"You seemed to know what you were doing." She told him, adding his procedure to her notes, "It was three clockwise, six counter and once clockwise right? And you ground one ounce of skin?"

"Yes." He nodded glaring at her notes.

"What?"

"You seem proficient, it won't be terrible to work with you as long as you remain quiet and do the work."

She frowned at him; it was as close to a compliment as the man had ever given her though she wasn't entirely sure it was a compliment, "Thank you?"

"James isn't a pure blood name."

"Neither is Snape." She reminded him, chin jutting up.

"I'm a half blood." He shrugged, "How are you related to Potter?"

"I'm not."

"Your brother and he are identical."

"Not entirely and Harry isn't James, however much they look alike so whatever you have against him leave my brother and I out of it."

"He's a bully."

"He's been nice enough to us so far and you don't seem all that friendly yourself. Being bullied doesn't give you a right to be nasty."

Snape gave her a surprised look, "I wasn't being nasty."

Hermione opened her mouth but shut it, she supposed he really hadn't been but she was judging him largely from memory of a man that didn't exist yet. "No and I'm sorry, of course you haven't been. I'm very pleased to be working with you."

"You are?" The look he gave her was so skeptical and guarded she had to bite back a laugh.

Hermione nodded unable to hide her grin, "I have a feeling it will upset Sirius and all those boys need a little shaking up, besides like I said, you seem to know what you're doing and I like working with people who can keep up with me."

"You shake them up and it's me they'll come after." He shook his head, "You do understand the concept of separate houses right?"

"Yes and I understand the rivalry has gone a bit to far from friendly competition, at least it seems that way between our houses. The other two seem to get along with everyone just fine."

"Wait until Quidditch."

"Friendly competition." She contradicted with a shrug. "Besides, you and I might be in different houses but we're a team in potions now Snape.

Snape rolled his eyes but offered a quiet, "Severus."

"Mya." She offered back with a warm smile. He just gave a curt nod back and flicked to another page in his textbook.

Hermione watched him from the corner of her eyes, examining him without seeming to. He was thin but more lean than scrawny. His hair hung to his shoulders and as with the adult she had known, his nose was his most prominent feature. His hands were large and callused with long fingers a piano player would kill for. His mouth was a little on the thin side and though not turned down was set firm, giving him an unapproachable look even without the frown.

Just before the end of class she shut her book and sent him a gentle smile, "See you next potions?"

He gave a curt nod and she fought a grin as she moved over to Harry, leaving him to bring their potion to the Professor's desk.

"Are you ok Mya?" Lily asked, Harry having already discerned the answer with a look.

"Fine." She frowned at the Head girl, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Severus can be…"

"A tool." Sirius offered coming back to his desk with James, both boys having delivered the potions made with their partners.

"And you're a jerk." Hermione snapped at him. His playful smirk immediately dropped into a frown as he watched her sweeping out of class.

He turned to Harry, "What?" Harry just shook his head and followed her out. Sirius turned to Lily instead, "What?"

"You're a bully Sirius, all four of you are." Lily huffed spinning after shooting a dark glare to James.

"We were getting along so well too." James frowned after her, "Thanks mate." He shoved Sirius.

"What did I do?" Sirius exclaimed.

"She's just a Slytherin loving bint." Peter offered almost gleefully as he imagined them turning against the two new students, including him in pranks instead of spending so much focus on how much like James and the new kid was.

"Shut up Pete." Remus growled at him.

Peter bit back his surprise at the response from the generally mellow Marauder.

"Seriously, what did I do?" Sirius asks trailing after Remus.

"This potions partners thing is going to help me win Lily, I can feel it." James crowed following them, "Can you feel it Sirius? This is going to be the best year!"

Peter followed behind his friends, he didn't get into the NEWT for Herbology so he was only a little hurt when they ignored him all the way outside and Sirius frowned at him, "Still here Peter? We have class."

"Right, yeah, just walking out with you. I've a free period so I'll just uh, hang out at the lake while you rot in class.

The three boys rolled their eyes and waved him off as they entered the greenhouse. "Meet us at the pitch after, you can help bring out the equipment for tryouts!" James called back. "Evans!" James immediately turned his attention to the red head, moving to sit with her, "we worked so well in potions I thought it might carry over." He winked at her.

Lily rolled her eyes, "If you can pay attention." She conceded. Arrogant and cocky though he was, she couldn't deny James was smart and a good student when he wasn't fooling around with his friends.

"Partners mate?" Sirius wrapped an arm around Remus's shoulders with a wide grin.

"Only if you can pay attention." Remus chuckled.


	6. Chapter 6

Herbology went quickly, being partnered with Lily, James was careful to pay attention and not much about with Sirius, who was also less apt to fool around when partnered with Remus instead of James. It was often remarked that the two boys were bad influences on each other but they figured it was the opposite. Their brilliance was just to much for some.

James and Sirius immediately latched onto Harry at the end of class to drag him to Quidditch tryouts, so Hermione followed quietly behind.

"Do you play?" Hermione asked without looking back for the third marauder she knew was half a step behind.

"Not really." Remus took a couple longer strides so he was beside her, "I mess around with the boys but it's James's thing."

"Not Sirius?"

Remus shrugged, "He loves to play but it's more of a fun, mess around thing for him, a game. James takes it more seriously; he loves being part of the team. It's why Peter wanted to play."

"How's that?"

"James and Sirius play and when we aren't all together they are with the team, at least James is. When he's with them, I'm studying and Peter's not so great a student but don't let his slacker boy doesn't give a damn attitude fool you because Sirius is and will spend a lot more time than people think studying with me, which can leave Peter a bit left out. Not much for being on his own or doing his own thing."

"Of them, who are you closest with?"

"Sirius." He shrugged, "Probably James is a very close second. Peter is one of my best mates but he's always been closer to James than Sirius or I, he prefers Sirius next to James, probably because I spend too much time reading. James and Sirius are practically brothers of course."

They found seats in the bleachers as they talked and waited for tryouts to start. "What about you and Harry? Who are your best mates?"

"Harry and I lost everything and everyone but we've always been best friends." She told him honestly, fighting back the small wave of grief as she forced a smile.

"I'm sorry." He offered genuinely. Quietly they watched the try outs.

"Oi mate you were brilliant!" James laughed wrapping an arm around Harry, "you'd make a fair chaser but your sister's right, you're bloody brilliant as seeker."

"Now you can get back to playing chaser." Peter grinned.

"Right you are mate!" James laughed happily as Remus and Hermione joined them.

"What do you think? Best team in years hey Moony?" Sirius clapped his friend on the shoulder.

Remus just nodded and shot a quick eye roll at Hermione making her bite back a laugh as they all made their way up to the castle for summer.

"So kitten, your brother got double the Quidditch gene in your shared pool, what did you get extra of?" Sirius asked her with a wink.

"Brains." Harry snorted with a laugh.

Hermione rolled her eyes at him but smiled, it was good to see him so happy. Quidditch was just the thing for him.

Lily joined them as they entered the great hall and James looked ready to explode with joy.

September 1 had fallen on a Thursday that year, so though it was the first day of school, it was also a Friday and when they got back up to the common room, the Marauders were quickly huddled, with Harry to plot their first adventure of the new year.

Hermione pulled a book into her lap, only a fraction of her focus staying with Harry in a subconscious way, the same way she subconsciously knew each time someone came and went from either dorm or the portrait and where everyone was in the room. Constant vigilance, it was so ingrained in her she didn't notice it, Lily quietly talking with Alice near her did. She also noticed the pain lurking in the depths of the brunette's eyes and as nervous as she, and the rest of their house had been at the idea of a second James, she noticed it in Harry to. He was more subdued than James, watchful and kind, completely lacking in the arrogance and obnoxiousness that plagued James at times, instead he seemed quietly confident, overly protective of his sister and just a bit closed off. Not that the marauders noticed that, they swept him up ready to indoctrinate him in their boys club just for looking like James without giving him the chance to say boo about it.

Lily watched as a frown on his face and shift in his posture caught Hermione's attention, their eyes met and as though he'd called her over she set aside her book and moved over to sit by him.

"Well hello luv." Sirius grinned at her; "Not coming to curtail our hijinks with your brother are you?

"They want to start the year off with complete reckless stupidity." Harry told her with twinkling eyes.

"Oh?"

"Apparently Filtch got some map of theirs end of year and they want to get it back." He couldn't hold back the mirth in his eyes as they met hers in silent acknowledgement of the Map so often part of their own adventures their six years in Hogwarts.

"Break into Filtch's office?" She mused with a frown and tap to her chin before giving James a glare, "How on earth did you make Head boy?" With a headshake she focused back on Harry, "Alright but we'll need a lookout, a distraction, no two distractions and an alibi while you slip in and get it."

"Right then." Harry nodded, a sly smile curving his features, "Peter's the one going in, Sirius, James and I will each create a distraction to confuse him, Remus can keep lookout for him but you'll need to do something about the demon cat."

Hermione frowned in thought and then nodded and looked at her watch, "Best to do it right before curfew."

"Not after?" Remus asked her with an amused expression.

"No." Hermione shook her head, "Before, Sirius you'll be with me, James you and Harry rally Peeves up, Peter, you'll have two minutes to get in and out. Remus keep watch and distract any other students or professors."

They ironed out the details of her plan and fifteen minutes to curfew they snuck out and quickly divided into groups. Remus and Peter towards Filtch's office, James and Harry to find Peeves and her and Sirius took a longer loop to the hall behind Filtches office to set off some whizbangs. Running to a secret passage they waited until they could hear Peeves making a racket and snuck through to the hall one over from Filtches and watched James run past one hall and then Harry another. Mrs. Norris hissed at one and then the other hesitating chasing one and Hermione hit her with a stunning hex. Sirius levitated her into a corner and they ducked into an alcove as Filtch ran past after Peeves. A few seconds passed and they could hear Remus walking down the hall talking, "Just doing my patrol as Prefect Professor, James is around as well and Bobby from Ravenclaw."

They sunk deeper into the alcove, Sirius wrapping an arm around her tiny waist to hide them both in the small shadowy space.

A shriek made them both jump, and Remus and Professor Sinistra immediately appeared behind the girl.

"What are you doing up and about Laura?" The professor demanded, "I, um, uh, well I was, heading back from the library."

"It's past curfew. Remus walk her back to Hufflepuff and you two." She turned to them and frowned, "You're in the same house, why are you out past curfew snogging in corridors?"

"I'm sorry." Hermione blushed, "Sirius came to find me because it was curfew, I forgot we had to be in our dorm, I'm not used to the schedule or rules, I'm very sorry professor."

"You were snogging because you don't know the schedule?" The hufflepuff girl snapped.

"I wasn't…"

"Jealousy doesn't suit you Laura, just leave her alone and run off to bed."

"Whatever Sirius Black, I bet you wouldn't know what to do with a woman and that's why you've never had a girlfriend!"

"Go. Now." The professor snapped at the girl, "And ten points from Hufflepuff."

"But…"

"One more word and it will be fifteen." The girls mouth snapped shut and she stomped off, "Make sure she gets there Mr. Lupin."

"Yes, ma'am." He nodded to her flicking his friends a sympathetic look before following the seething sixth year.

"Ms. James, in future you will remember school regulations, in fact you'll write me a short parchment on curfew and I'll have one on student conduct from you Mr. Black, now hurry up to your dormitory before I take points from you as well."

"Yes Professor." Hermione nodded solemnly.

"Thank you Professor." Sirius grinned and tugged Hermione by the waist before letting her go and taking her hand instead, pulling her as he jogged down the corridor and into a secret passage, they took a short detour and met with James and Harry before getting back to the common room where Peter sat holding up the map with pride.

Remus came in a few minutes later with a shrug, "I had to finish patrol."

"We got it!" James told him crowing with happiness.

Hermione rolled her eyes and went to go up to bed, "Oh no you don't." Sirius grabbed her around the waist spinning her around and back towards them. She'd frozen in his arms for a millisecond before her elbow snapped back into his solar-plexus and she shoved away from him, grabbing her wand as she spun. It all happened in less than ten seconds but Harry was beside her, wand drawn and face furious, while hers was white though her wand was steady.

The boys, the entire common room, just stared in shock. Slowly Hermione dropped her wand and lifted a hand to Harry's. The brush of her fingertips had his dropping and he turned to her, making sure she was ok.

"I, I'm sorry, mate, I didn't…" Sirius ran a hand through his hair, his other still rubbing the spot her elbow had hit him. "I just wanted her to celebrate with us. I mean, it was her brilliant plan." He looked from them to his friends and back, "I'm sorry."

Harry just shook his head and slipped his wand away, "I'm going to bed." Hermione whispered.

Harry grabbed her arm as she turned and tugged her back, guiding her out of the common room and up to the boys dorm.

Sirius turned back to his friends, perplexed, disturbed and regretful, "I didn't…"

"It's ok Sirius." Lily laid a hand on his shoulder having witnessed the whole thing, "I'm sure she knows you didn't mean anything."

"Just don't touch her." Peter told him with a headshake, "He gets crazy when you touch her."

"Think she was the one went a bit crazy." Penelope huffed.

"Shut up Penny." Sirius growled at her, it wasn't so much the shot of her elbow but the look in her eyes as she stood across him wand raised in defense. She had shaken, or cried but there was more than fear in those eyes, it was pain, a memory of nightmare she'd already lived.

"Sirius?" James moved closer to his friend. Sirius shook his head and sat down, all excitement from getting the map back gone. He looked up at Remus, who just shook his head and sat beside his friend.

"Hey Lily." James moved over to the red head, "You'll tell her he didn't mean anything by grabbing her right? I mean, it was just a friendly thing you know, you saw."

"I'm sure she knows James, but I'll tell her." Lily assured him.

"You think she's ok?"

"I think they've both had a hard time of it and came to Hogwarts for more than just a formal last year."

"You know something crazy?"

"What?"

"I might like the new version of me better than myself." He whispered.

"I like this you better than the you I knew last year too." She told him with an eye roll, "Though the arrogance is still clearly in overabundance."

James shook his head and frowned at her, "I'm not sure if that was an insult or a compliment Evans but I meant James two point oh, Harry."

"It was both and what about Harry?"

"He's me only not." James shrugged.

"You look a lot alike James but he's not you and since when haven't you thought you were the best thing to walk these halls?"

"Since me two point oh walked through them and he's mysterious and a bit dark, brilliant and fun and you know, I think he's nicer than me because he didn't even seem to consider hexing Snivilous during potions when the git glared at her and even though he doesn't seem to like Peter at all, he kept Willard and Joel from picking on him."

"You sound like you have a crush on him." She teased.

"You are the only love of my life Evans." He grinned at her and got up, "He is definitely the next marauder though, he was brilliant tonight Evans, almost as good as me."

She shook her head chuckling, "Almost but not quite, I'm sure."

"Well there is only one James Potter, even if there is a James two point oh, there is nothing like the original baby." He waggled his eyebrows at her and moved back to his friends. "Snap Peter?"

"Yeah!" Peter readily agreed. Sirius, to energetic to sit still for long was shaking one leg and twirling his pen as he contemplated his notebook before continuing with his sketch. Beside him Remus was flicking through a book, growling and nudging Sirius's bouncing leg every few minutes to make him stop. Sirius would for about thirty seconds before the leg began bouncing again.

A few hours later the boys made their way back up to their dorm. Frank was still in the common room snuggling with Alice and Adam was playing chess with Penelope so the room was empty save for Harry's bed. The curtains were drawn leaving only a tiny crack, through which the boys could see a tiny feminine fist curled around the edge of the mattress.


	7. Chapter 7

When they woke in the morning, Frank and Adam were still sleeping but both Harry and Hermione were gone.

Sirius found them by the lake, "I'm really sorry." He said, lifting his hands and stopping a few feet away, "I should never have grabbed you like that."

Hermione shook her head, "It was me, I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting it. I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?"

"Nah." He grinned, "I'm a beater kitten, I get worse hits to my kidneys weekly."

Hermione bit back a smile as she shook her head at him, "So, now that you have your map back, what are you boys plotting?"

"Nothing yet." He laughed, "We didn't actually expect to get away with it, you two are bloody brilliant."

"Where are the others?" Harry asked looking past his godfather.

"Eating." Sirius shrugged, "I came to find you, not first, I grabbed food but came instead of sitting." He admitted pulling an apple from his robes and offering a shrug. "What are you reading?" He asked dropping next to Harry though he spoke to Hermione.

"A book on becoming an animagus." She told him flicking to another page.

"How's that then? I mean uh, why?"

Hermione shrugged, "I like learning."

"We thought it would be a good idea to learn." Harry shrugged in agreement.

Sirius nodded and plucked at the grass, "do you ever sit still?" Hermione demanded after a long silence.

Sirius barked out a laugh, "Not really no. The best I can do is when I sketch and even then I drive Moony mad twirling my pens or if I'm not really focused and my leg bounces, he's nearly hexed me a few times for that."

"Let's do something then." Harry stretched and got up, "Broom race?"

"You're on." Sirius bounced up and looked down at Hermione, "Coming Kitten?"

"No." She shook her head, eyes still on the book, "I hate to fly."

"HATE TO FLY!" Sirius shouted in indignant surprise, "who hates to fly?"

"Me." Hermione told him with an eye roll, "Harry got double the flying and Quidditch genes I guess."

Sirius just shook his head in admonishment. James, Remus and Peter joined them and soon, Lily, Alice and Frank arrived as well. Remus only flew for a bit before dropping to the ground next to her and leaning back in the grass. "Sirius says you're studying animagus magic?"

"Yes." She closed the book to smile at him, "I know, studying on a Saturday but I really don't like to fly and mostly I'm just reading."

Remus chuckled and shook his head, "Never defend reading to me Mya. You might have to for the other boys but not me." He reached out for the book and nodded, "This is a good one, you should read The Anima Within as well, cheesy title but really informative."

"Thanks." She smiled taking the book back.

"Sirius apologize for last night?"

"Yes though he didn't need to."

"He'll be a bit… hesitant and protective of you for a bit I think." At her frown he gave her a weak smile, "Thing is, he's the most loyal friend you will ever make. Scaring you like that, hurting you, it'll hit him hard for a while."

"Remus?"

"It's sort of hard to explain, my home life is a bit different and his just plain sucked. I was sort of a loner, never had friends, then I'm on the train first year, minding my own business and Sirius comes in, by the end of the train ride, he'd just, decided we would be best mates, once we were sorted he sat next to me and James was across from us, once those two met it was all over, they instantly bonded." He rolled his eyes watching them goofing off as they flew, "Brothers born to different families." Remus grinned and shook his head, "We met Peter of course but didn't talk to him until a couple days later, he was getting picked on by some older Slytherin's and James stepped in. Sirius immediately embraced him in his circle and hexed the boys. We've been a foursome since." Remus smiled in memory and then shook his head, "Anyways, the point is, that really, we all come down to Sirius. You asked before who I was closer with and I said for me it was Sirius, for Peter probably James but truth is, James probably would have defended Peter and then gone back to ignoring his existence focusing on me and Sirius and pranks and whatever else we thought of as eleven year olds. Sirius brought us all together, maybe because his home life sucked so much, or his hatred of his family, he's determined to build a new one and once he's decided to include you…" Remus shrugged.

"So I'm included?" Hermione asked softly.

"You and Harry both." Remus chuckled, "At first, from the platform, he just thought you were a knockout and Harry was James's evil doppelganger but by the end of lunch yesterday we could all tell we would have two new best friends, because Sirius had decided you belonged. That's why he included Harry in the plotting last night."

"So Sirius just decides at random that someone is going to be part of his little family?"

"Sort of," Remus shrugged, "It's more that he gets this feeling, a sixth sense or something, he had it with me and James and well, his loyalty to our house and rivalry with Slytherin brought in Peter but he's… the glue I guess."

"He's not really what I expected." She admits quietly thinking about the older Sirius.

"The real him isn't what most people expect."

"What do you mean?"

"Sirius is seen as the ultimate bad boy, number one desired by girls of all houses but maybe Slytherin. He's dark and mysterious, mischievous and a slacker. The truth is he's loyal and honest and the reason he ignores girls is, and I quote, he hasn't met, _the_ girl yet." Remus laughs, "He looks, and he'll talk with us guys but for him, she has to be _his_ girl. James on the other hand, is and has always been obsessed with Lily and the whole school knows it, not that the girls don't still want him, badly, but he's a flirt and a prankster and not a mystery at all."

"What about you?"

"Me?" Remus shrugged, "I'm the quieter book worm who tries to keep them from doing anything to terrible or stupid. Peter is… he's funny and quirky when he's not trying to hard. He's not stupid if he applied himself and he's pretty powerful when he focuses it but he doesn't, he's a bit of a fool and doesn't try, won't work for it like the rest of us. Unlike James and Sirius, who despite disrupting class, _do_ pay attention, Peter doesn't. He idolizes James and Sirius a bit too much and can take things a bit to far to impress them but is mostly timid. He hates to be alone and is always up for a game of Exploding Snap or a prank or a midnight run to the kitchens for chocolate. We don't have much in common but he's loyal and fun to be around."

"Do any of you have girl friends?"

Remus smirked and laughed, "Like I said, James has been in love with Lily since he first thought about girls that way. Sirius is rebellious and charming but he's always been set on finding _the _girl. He has taken out a girl or two but nothing serious and the second they even hinted at wanting more he ended it before they could get clingy or be hurt. I don't date and Peter, he doesn't really say much about girls. Actually we aren't sure he's interested in girls." He frowned, "Not that he's interested in blokes." Remus shook his head, "He could be, come to think of it, I have no idea. What about you and Harry?"

"We both cared about someone special once." She told him honestly, "It didn't work out, for either of us. Harry and Ginny broke up and Ron and I never got together, I don't even know if he knew how I felt, he was sort of dense about that even though I had a crush on him for years."

"Maybe it'll work it out."

"Ginny and Ron both died."

Remus reached out and took her hand in comfort, "My mum died last year. She was a muggle and when she got hurt in a ski accident there was nothing we or their doctors could do."

Hermione squeezed his hand back, "Ron was murdered and Ginny killed herself. Harry and I lost our parents to terrorists. Over the years, we've lost everything but each other. We're going to make it better though, the future, we're going to have a family again, to survive and be happy."

Remus squeezed her hand again, "What do you want for the future? I mean, to do, after Hogwarts?"

"I'm not sure. Harry and I talked about Auror Training, Magical Law Enforcement or even Curse Breaking but we aren't sure yet."

"What if you decide to do different things?"

Hermione shook her head, "Harry and I… we're a team."

Sirius dropped to the grass grinning at them as he walked over and sank down to sit beside them, "Your brother must have been born with a broom." He laughed, "I almost fell off trying to keep up, we lost Peter, Frank did fall but Alice made sure he wasn't hurt."

"Pete's lost?" Remus frowned at his friend.

"James is looking for him with Lily and Harry. I'm heading up to the castle to swipe us all a picnic, give me a hand?"

"Sure." Hermione smiled and Sirius held out a hand to pull her up but quickly retracted it.

"Sorry." He mumbled.

Hermione jumped up and linked her arm with his, "Come on, you can tell me about Remus, he'll talk all about you guys but avoids talking about himself."

"Clearly he's the modest one and he's the smart one." Sirius laughed, "He keeps us from doing anything to stupid but don't let his prefect act fool you, mostly he keeps us from doing anything stupid by helping us come up with better ideas. He has a chocolate addiction so anytime you need to apologize to him or he's feeling down just hand over a block of chocolate. Any type will do but Honeydukes chocolate bars are his favorite, milk chocolate or sometimes a little dark, he says it's a bit bitter but still likes it and he thinks the white tastes a bit like soap. He's brilliant at every subject except for potions, he's a bit bullocks at it, squeaked into NEWT level with an E but it's his worst subject by far. Peter is worse, we aren't sure why Slug let him into NEWT level. James usually partners him and I partner Remus, at least he gets the theory part. I don't have the patience to work with Pete, really I don't have the patience for potions which is why I only have an E but unlike Remus an E is pretty typical for me, he's an O man himself. Let's see, his favorite class, besides DADA because that is everyone's favorite, is Ancient Runes, boring but eh." Sirius shrugged, "He knows all sorts of cool muggle things and gets me muggle magazines and comics and pens to sketch with because they're way better than quills. Actually they have this amazing sketching charcoal which he calls pen-sells, much better than our charcoal sticks which crumble. I get a new case of them every Christmas and this summer he introduced me to something amazing called a motorbike, I'll have to have one when we graduate, it's almost as great as flying."

Hermione laughed as she thought of Sirius's motorbike, learning as much about him as Remus as he described his friend.

They gathered food and pumpkin juice before heading back out. The others had found Peter and everyone was waiting under the big tree. Hermione felt her heart pull at memories of the future past but shook off the melancholy as Sirius continued to describe some of the Marauders more memorable pranks to her.

Sunday played out similar to Saturday and to soon it was Monday and time for their first full week of classes. The week passed easily, Hermione had always been used to being the only girl so being surrounded by the Marauders was easy, Lily spent time with them as did Alice and Frank but they and the other Gryffindors had closer friendships with each other and it was clear from the start that Hermione and Harry were already viewed as Marauders to the others in their house.

**A/N**

Thanks for the reviews! PLEASE SEND MORE!

Note to Bellislefan - love the guess but will not confirm nor deny anything more than that there is something special between them but he's not the only on she has something special with - who ends up together in the end, well I hope you keep reading to find out.

**I am wondering who everyone else thinks she's meant to end up with, as the story progresses please share all guesses, suggestions and opinions for Hermione, Harry and the others!**


	8. Chapter 8

In potions that week Hermione smiled at Snape and tried not to be hurt at his responding scowl and the way he practically ignored her. They finished first again and he immediately tidied his things and pulled out his textbook.

"Severus?" She questioned tentatively.

"What?" He sent her a glare.

"Did I do something to upset you?"

"No." He frowned at her.

"Are you upset?"

"About what?"

"Anything?"

"No."

"You seem upset."

Severus rolled his eyes, "What do you want?"

"I, nothing, I was trying to be nice."

"You're a Gryffindor and I'm a Slytheryn."

"I thought we agreed in potions we were partners and the whole overdone house rivalry would boil down to friendly competition, friendly being a big word in there, huge, all capitals and exclamations." She teased biting back a smile as he rolled his eyes.

"You're with them now aren't you?"

"Them?"

"The Marauders." He spat the name.

"Not in potions, I'm with you."

"Right." He snorted.

"Please Severus. It'll be a long year if you hate me just because they made me a friend."

He gave her a shocked look, "I'm pretty sure hating _me_ is a requirement for them."

"If it is, I'm not willing to meet it." She told him lifting her chin stubbornly.

"I called Lily Evans a mudblood." He blurted.

"I told my best friend he had the emotional capacity of a teaspoon." She shrugged, "Sometimes we say things we don't mean." Then she frowned and grinned, "That was actually pretty accurate but I also sent a flock of conjured birds to attack him once and I called a boy who was mean to me a ferret. Once I even punched him. He deserved it and I meant it so that's a bad example too." She shrugged, "My friend once called me a nightmare and bushy haired-know-it-all."

"Did you forgive him?"

"Of course." She shrugged.

"Lily wouldn't even let me apologize."

"Mudblood is a horrible thing to call someone." She sighed, "I'd forgive you if you said something awful to me once, if I didn't think you really meant it or just said it in the moment to lash out and I bet you just called her that to lash out and not because you think she's less than you because her parents are muggles."

Severus nodded, "I did, lash out I mean, Lily is amazing, I'd never think she was beneath me or anyone else."

"So ok then." Hermione smiled at him, "Friendly competitors and potions partners?"

"Sure." He conceded with an eye roll.

"Even though I'm friends with your nemeses? Neme-sees?" She frowned and then gave up, "The marauders." He snorted in response and turned the page in his book, Hermione examined him again as he read, so different and so similar to the man he would become. "You're surprisingly attractive." She blushed and slapped a hand to her mouth.

Severus had turned to gape at her, "What?"

"I'm sorry." She shook her head and focused on her book.

"I'm scrawny with a big nose and no friends so if you're trying to pull some prank you can shove it up Potter's arse because I know what I am and I wont fall for it." He hissed quietly.

Hermione shook her head, wide eyed in shock, "You do have a large nose but it gives your face character and you're lean not scrawny, it's a wiry strength. I admit you aren't obviously beautiful, which is why I said you were surprisingly attractive though that was rude and I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it at all let alone go on but it's not a prank and I'll maybe die of embarrassment, please let's forget that ever came out of my mouth."

He glared at her for a few moments before giving a curt nod and focusing back on his textbook, "This is wrong." He muttered, loud enough for her to hear, "Honestly the people who write these books are complete dunderheads."

Hermione flicked her eyes over to his page and flipped a few pages in hers to it with a frown, "How is it wrong?"

"You need to stir it to boil, stirring clockwise not wait until it boils to stir and once it starts to boil you switch to stirring counterclockwise, seven times and then turn down the heat stir clockwise twice and counterclockwise once and then let it simmer." He tells her writing it down and handing her the parchment to tuck in the pages of her book. "Also, this next one, if you add a little ashwinder shell, just the shell, crushed not powdered, it creates this warming, affectionate feeling that works to enhance the trusting effects that make the person want to confess the truth about what they're feeling."

They discussed a few potions and techniques for preparing different ingredients until Slughorn told them to turn in their potions. Severus took it up again while Hermione made her way back towards her friends.

The days began to blur together, Sirius and James got detention, twice. Harry focused more on his studies than before and thanks to his own years of sneaking around, so many of which were life and death rather than just fun, he got caught far less often than his former father and godfather.

James was a bit of a flirt though anyone could see his eyes and his heart were all for Lily. Sirius had a habit of ignoring everyone who wasn't a marauder unless they were being pranked, so of course girls seemed to almost swoon if he paid them any sort of attention. Remus, tall and sandy haired, was completely unaware of the numerous crushes that had eyes tracking him as well. He was like Harry in that, as much as in their quieter and more devious plans for the marauders. Hermione got along with them all as well as with Lily, Alice and Frank though she wasn't overly close with anyone but Harry and spent the most of her time in the library.

"HOGSMEADE!" James shouted as he entered the Great Hall for breakfast. A few weeks into school and it was the first weekend the students were free to go.

Hermione let herself be carried off by their plans, accepting that as an extension of Harry who'd been completely swept into their boys club she was pulled along. As they walked Harry fell back beside her, "Do you feel like we're growing distant?" He asked in a near whisper.

"We remind each other of home and here, it's nice to be young, to be with them and have fun. You deserve that."

"I can't lose you Mya. I know you're right here but I think sometimes I miss you." He shakes his head, "I see you everyday still."

"You can't lose me Harry, we're part of each other, I'm happy because you're happy."

"You're lonely though." She can't argue, he knew like he knew so many things about her.

"I just miss you sometimes too, the way things used to be."

They thought back to their Hogwarts, to Ron and sharp bolts of pain ran through them both, "I know how happy I am but, I still miss that too. Sometimes I feel bad being happy."

"Oh Harry no. You should be happy. We both should. I just…"

"What?"

"I never had the time to be sad, to heal. With fighting and then… missing them all hurt so much, I couldn't really think about me, about what happened. I miss them but I'm healing from that here, the spell helped us both to heal because we'll make it better but I can't make better what happened to me Harry." Her voice cracks even though they're whispering and she fights back tears.

He reaches out to squeeze her hand, "I wish I could kill him."

"Draco did." She whispers and sniffles locking away the tears, "Draco did." She repeats turning to look at Harry, "We need to remember that, remember about his mother and about Regulus."

Harry nodded "Snape too, it's lucky you got partnered in potions."

"He needs Lily to forgive him Harry."

"She will." He's not sure how but his mother can't hold a grudge like that, he just knows she'd be the forgiving type, maybe… she was definitely the stubborn type.

"Come on!" Peter shouted back at them. He was someone they were both having trouble with. Hatred of who he had become, could still become, warred with the image of the boy he seemed to be and being cruel went against their natures, but could befriending him change things when he'd betrayed his best friends? He was weak and petty, sometimes mean but mostly just insecure and a bit timid.

Harry shook his head and Hermione nudged his shoulder with her own, "Think of it this way, keep your friends close and your enemies closer, until we know which one he is, at least he's around to keep an eye on."

"Right." Harry snorted, "Come on then." They jogged a few feet forward to catch up to their friends and Sirius fell back to walk beside Hermione. Remus had been right that first Saturday, he was especially careful and protective of her.

"So Kitten, we'll hit the sweets shop first, then I need a new quill and you'll want to go to the bookshop, Remus will come but James and Peter are going to the broom shop, James needs to fix a wriggle in his foot cross bar."

Together they went into the sweet shop and Harry was dragged off with James and Peter so Hermione went with Remus and Sirius to the tiny bookshop, which in two decades would sell only quills and parchment. Sirius picked out his quill and then trailed after her while Remus disappeared to find the text he was looking for.

"Why don't you meet James and Harry at the Quidditch shop?"

"What for?" He shrugged flicking through a book absently and then laughing when he shoved it back and the one next to it tried to hit him.

Hermione rolled her eyes at him and plucked another book from the shelf while he tapped out a random pattern on the spines of books with the end of his quill.

"I'm ready." She told him with a sigh.

"You sure? Moony usually takes twice as long and he only ever comes for one thing specific."

"I have what I need and you're driving me nuts, can't you ever be still? I know you can be quiet, I've seen it."

Sirius chuckled and shook his head, "Fine, you keep doing the book worship thing and I'll go sketch over there just come get me when you and Moony are ready to go to the Three Broomsticks."

"You don't have to wait for us." She called after him but it was pointless, he just waved backwards and pulled out his sketchpad, quill tapping the side of his leg.

Hermione frowned and shook her head after him before browsing the shelves. She selected another book and then paid for them and wandered over to Sirius. He was absorbed and perfectly still and quiet except for his hand flowing over the page. She stood back and watched him a moment, the autumn sun shining through the window lit up his pale gray eyes, which were only highlighted by the slight frown of deep concentration and the scruff of unshaven dark hair along his jaw. It was his stillness that made her stare though, Sirius Black was never completely still.

"If his pencil stops the energy comes back with extra to spare." Remus whispered moving next to her with a grin as he watched his friend. "He's not even still like this when he sleeps."

Hermione chuckled and shook her head; "Whoever introduced him to sketching deserves an award."

"Regulus." Remus shrugged, "His little brother. Just don't ask him about it." Hermione's smile fell as she nodded and moved towards the still boy.

She barely got a glimpse of his drawing before he closed the book, jumping up and grinning, "Ready then." Remus was right, he walked quickly to the Three Broomsticks and as they talked he used his hands more than usual and his leg bounced as though having spent thirty minutes still had built up excess energy bursting to get out. She had to bite back a smile whenever she looked at him but shared a secret smirk with Remus when the boy's leg first bounced into motion at the table.


	9. Chapter 9

"Mya." Harry wrapped an arm around hers as they walked back, "Have fun?"

"Yeah." She grinned at him, "I got the last book on becoming an animagus, it's got the instructions for the potion to find your form, it's shockingly simple as potions go. I've been studying for years and now its all coming together, we should be able to transform by the next new moon."

"It's almost unfair, I got all the knowledge from our bond and never did half the work, not even a quarter to help you."

"We haven't really had a lot of spare time Harry and anyways, I like studying and I'm glad I wont be trying it alone." She grinned at him. "I'll need to find a new project to challenge me so I don't get bored."

"Don't we already have one?" He asked back with a lifted brow.

Hermione's expression fell as she nodded with a frown, "I haven't forgotten."

"I'm sorry Mya, I know you haven't, I just meant, you should have some fun and be young too, I'm not the only one who missed out on getting to be young and carefree."

Hermione forced a smile but it quickly turned natural, "Learning is fun for me Harry."

He shook his head and laughed, "Peter thinks Sirius has a crush on you."

"What?"

"As soon as he said it James denied it and then went still and frowned then his mouth fell open and he spun on me and got us almost kicked out of the shop when he shouted profanity."

"What?"

"Yeah," Harry laughed, "He let out this loud _Fucking Hell_ spun on me and opened his mouth and closed it a few times and then goes, 'don't curse him… or me, but Pete's right, I think Padfoot likes your sister, like, like likes her' then he shook his head and muttered about Sirius not telling him."

Hermione rolled her eyes, "Sirius doesn't like me."

"Whatever you say Mya but James and Peter think he does and he did go with you to the bookshop instead of with us to the Quidditch shop."

"He needed a quill."

"He waited for you."

"And Remus."

"Right." Harry snorted in amusement.

"When do you think James and Lily get together?" Hermione changed the subject.

"Who knows," Harry shrugged, "I hope they still do."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've been thinking about it and it's not really a guarantee is it? We don't know how my parents ended up together and nothing about the future is set so maybe they wont. If she forgives Snape maybe she'll end up with him or maybe they'll just be friends but it will drive a wedge between her and James and she'll marry someone completely random. I sure hope Remus isn't alone for the next twenty years and who knows who Sirius will meet that may have been with someone else completely before. I mean, the whole future is a complete mystery." He grinned at her, "I shouldn't be happy about it but I am, I mean, if they're meant to be James and Lily will be together but the future is… it will be different Mya, completely and totally different, and it will be better, we'll make it better. For you and me and them and everyone not born yet."

Later in the library Hermione saw Regulus sitting in a corner, she remembered what Remus had told her, Regulus had started Sirius sketching but she knew little of Regulus except that in a couple years he would defect, which meant he was either already or about to become a death eater and until he defected he was a believer, no one had forced him into it like so many in her time.

When he glanced up and saw her looking he sent a withering glare, he was similar to Sirius in looks but without the beautiful gray eyes and playful smirk seemingly always present on his older brother. She hurried over to a shelf and plucked up a reference book she knew she'd need before finding her usual table, Severus was two tables away from the one she liked so she moved to his instead.

"Hey Severus." He looked up and nodded at her before turning his attention back to his book. "Can I sit with you?"

"Why?"

"Why not?"

Severus rolled his eyes but said nothing else as she sat across from him, "That potion doesn't make you an animagus, it just helps reveal what you might be and it's not completely accurate without the proper training to become an animagus."

"I know that." She told him flicking to another page. "I'm still going to brew it."

"It's easy." Severus shrugged.

"Have you?"

"Dream walked with my animal spirit?" He asked lifting a brow, "In fourth year. I was a fox."

"Suits you." She smiled at him and flicked to another page. "I wonder what I would be."

"A cat."

"Why?" She asked him with a frown.

"Independent, intelligent, watchful, curious, you can be playful and affectionate but are specific about with whom, you're loyal, can be calculating and you're graceful and agile. Kind and gentle but with claws." Hermione just stared at him, "We might be partners in potions but I'm also in DADA with you and arithmancy." He told her with a shrug, "I'm observant."

A grin broke out and she fought back a laugh, "Help me with the potion then and we'll see if you're right."

"You don't need help, I told you, it's simple and you're proficient in potions."

"High praise from you and I might not need help but it would still be nice to have the company."

"Of me?" He frowned at her.

"Why not?"

"I'm a Slytherin for one." At her eye roll he glared, "Your friends hate me for another."

"So what? I don't hate you and when you aren't being a snarky git, I might even like you."

"When aren't I a snarky git?"

"When we're brewing." She answered with a shrug. His smirk was almost a real smile.

"Fine." He caved, "It's Saturday so curfew is later, we can do it now."

"Now?" She frowned at him and looked at her new book.

Severus rolled his eyes, "You can read that and do it alone or I can teach you a better way."

Hermione closed the book and grinned at him, "We'll need to pinch the ingredients."

Severus rolled his eyes at her, "Or we can ask Slughorn to let us in and use the potions classroom like I usually do when brewing out of class."

"He lets you brew when you want to?"

Severus shrugged, "Generally."

He was right, Slughorn was only to happy to let his two best students use his classroom on a Saturday evening and didn't even question them on what they were brewing. Just winked and nudged Severus's shoulder hinting at what a good job he'd done matching them as partners, Slytherin and Gryffindor or not, heavy wink wink, they could use his class anytime to work _together_ several mores winks and guffaws followed this. Hermione and Severus rolled their eyes and forced smiles until he was gone.

"Ok." Severus grinned pulling out a cauldron, "What?" Hermione just gaped at him, "What?" He demanded.

"You smiled." She told him in shock. He glared at her and laughter bubbled up that she just barely suppressed, "I've never seen you give more than an amused smirk but you just smiled."

He rolled his eyes at her, "Are we going to brew or are you going to titter like that all night?"

"Both." She smirked at him. "Will you smile again?"

"No." He sneered though she could tell he was fighting another smile so she just chuckled and set about working.

When they finished she bottled some for Harry and slipped it in her pocket, at his frown she explained with just his name, "Harry."

Severus nodded like he understood as he bottled more and handed it to her. At her confusion he frowned back at her, "Aren't you taking it with him, the whole point to this was to check if I was right about you."

"Exactly, I'm taking mine now." She told him pulling the cork from the vial.

"Wait." He stopped her, "You should sit down, it's this sort of trance like thing and you need to focus." He rolled his eyes, "I only did the basic reading about becoming an animagus but it takes intense focus and you want to connect with your animal form, it took me two tries to see the fox and I couldn't even merge with it, you have to merge with the form to continue the process to become an animagus but that takes intense focus and years of training. You can still see yours like I did though, if you try properly."

She grinned at him, "I'm focused, promise." Then she sat cross-legged on the cold dungeon floor, smirked up at him and took the potion. Carefully she monitored her breathing and closed her eyes, focusing on each breath and trying to relax. Behind her eyelids light seemed to dance and then the dark became foggy.

She grinned at Severus when she blinked her eyes open and saw him sitting across from her, an open potions text in his lap, "I can't believe you were right." She laughed. "I thought I might be an otter because it's my patronis or maybe a rabbit or something but I saw this little chocolate colored cat."

Severus shook his head and rolled his eyes, "Your animagus is your animal self, your patronis can change, who you are, at your core, that never does. A cat suits you."

"A fox suits you." She smiled back at him, "I never would have guessed but you are very intelligent and cunning." She chuckled, "I can't imagine you being that colorful though."

He scowled at her, "Well I was a black fox."

Hermione laughed and nodded, "Yup, that fits."

"Of course it does." He rolled his eyes at her, "It would be my animagus if I chose to spend the next few years working on something so pointless."

"Why is it pointless?"

"It would be a great disguise, perfect to hide or disappear except that you have to register which defeats any real purpose. My time is better spent at more immediately useful work, like potions and DADA."

"What do you want to do after school?"

"I'll become a potions master." He shrugged, "Maybe develop new potions and spells. I'll have to find an apprenticeship and figure out how to support myself so I'll probably have to follow some useless and boring pursuit until I can achieve my goals and make a living at it."

"What about your family?"

"My mother neglected the basic human and animal instinct to survive and fell in love with a muggle who despised that being a witch made her more powerful than him. He made sure she and I knew he was stronger, and the one in control of our lives, that he was the provider and she was the woman who had to stay home and take care of him. Not that he actually provided, he got fired mostly and drank away most of the money. Eventually he beat her to death and finally drank himself to death a few months later."

"Is that the year you called Lily a…" His scowl was answer enough. "I'm sorry Severus."

"I'm going to work on another potion, you should find your friends."

"I'd rather keep brewing." She offered gently. His curt nod was invitation to stay and they brewed until curfew leaving a stasis charm on the last cauldren.

From that night Hermione moved to sit with him in the library and snuck into the potions room to brew with him when Harry was off with the Marauders. By the end of October, he was simply Sev and she teased him about counting any real smile he gave her, they were up to nine.


	10. Chapter 10

Halloween was when it all blew up. Hermione was walking with Lily when they came upon James, Sirius and Peter surrounding Severus.

"Don't." Lily grabbed her arm to stop her as she angrily went to step in. Hermione wrenched her arm from Lily sending her a glare, "He wont thank you." The red head insisted.

Hermione ignored her and sent a quick and vicious stinging hex at Peter, who yelped and spun, wand raised, his expression angry as he fired a nasty spell back. Sirius decked him, hard, his nose spraying blood as he flew back.

Everyone outside stared at the dark-haired man in shock. It was during this silence that Harry and Remus found them.

"What's going on?" Harry demanded.

"James?" Remus asked looking from Severus, still on the ground to his friend but his eye caught Sirius still trembling with rage and Peter sitting shocked with tears in his eyes and blood flowing around the hand he held up to his nose.

No one knew what to say, "She attacked me first." Peter finally mumbled.

Sirius just growled at him and took two steps to Severus yanking the other boy to his feet roughly, "Take her to brew or something." He practically shoved the boy at Hermione before turning back to his friend with a glare. "We're going to have a chat."

To stunned to move for a minute Severus glared at him but shrugged and pulled her arm through his and led her away, Lily following after them. Harry stayed with the boys to sort it out, knowing she was fine.

"What was that about?" Lily finally asked as they entered the castle.

Hermione shrugged, "James and Sirius don't like me spending time with her." Severus spat out.

"Sirius just shoved her to you and told you to spend time with her."

"_That_ is a mystery." Severus shook his head, "So was that hit, where did the little pureblood learn to punch? Why didn't he use a hex? Why did he attack Peter at all?"

"He likes Mya." Lily shrugged. At Hermione's expression she laughed, "Come on, the whole school can see it, you can't? He's terribly jealous of Sev. I bet that's why they were picking on him."

"You mean because James picked on him because of you?" Hermione shot back.

"He did not." Lily glared.

"You abandoned your friendship with Severus and they don't pick on him anymore." Hermione spat back, "He made one little mistake and you threw away a life time of friendship."

"One little mistake?" Lily almost screeched back as they argued around Severus. "He called me a mudblood because I tried to help him!"

"Don't be so conceited! If you could see past your own bloody perfection you'd know he was lashing out because he was hurt, you're a terrible friend Lily Evans." Hermione, arm still linked with Severus's, jerked him a little more towards her and away from Lily on his other side.

The red head grabbed his other arm and yanked him closer, "I'm not, at all, am I Severus? We were the best of friends!"

"Until you tossed him aside." Hermione hissed.

"He tossed _me_ aside, I'm the mudblood!"

"He apologized or tried to and you were a bitch!"

They'd stopped walking and turned to face each other, still holding tightly to one of his arms while Severus stood there in complete shock, not entire sure what was happening. One moment he was being taunted and hexed by the Marauders, without the somewhat restraining presence of Lupin, next Sirius punched his best mate and shoved Mya to him and now she and Lily were arguing over him? What the hell universe had he just stepped into?

"I was hurt!"

"So was he!"

"You think I haven't missed him? I didn't know how to make it better!"

"Did you try talking to him, telling him you forgave him?"

"So he could call me that again? I tried to help him, he clearly didn't want to be my friend anymore, even if he was sorry for announcing it by saying that to me!"

"You were his only friend!"

"I made a mistake!"

They stood there glaring at each other and finally he shifted, catching their attention, both girls looked horrified at their white knuckles gripping his arms and yanked their hands back comically.

"Sorry Sev." Hermione rubbed the spot she'd been clutching.

"Me too." Lily turned to him and then licked her lips, "I really am sorry, for everything."

"Me too." He offered her a tentative smile and she smiled back, linking their arms.

Hermione shook her head and took his other arm, both girls tugging him a little as they started walking towards the dungeon again. Severus let himself be led, walking along in a bit of a daze.

"Do you really think James was mean to him because we were best friends?" Lily asked Hermione gently, "I don't want him to go back to being such an awful bully. He's almost… fun, to be around now."

"Do you really not know how in love with you he is?" Hermione snorted.

"Everyone knows that." Severus mumbled.

Lily stumbled a little as they walked, "Really? I mean, he's such an obnoxious flirt. I figured I was just a challenge or something."

"How can you like him?" Severus growled.

"I don't!" Lily defended, a little to vehemently.

"Yes you do." Hermione rolled her eyes.

"No!" Lily hissed but a sharp look from Severus made her huff, "Ok fine, I like him but I don't know why, he's so, so, insufferable." She looked pleadingly at the boy, "I'm sorry Sev. I really am. He's always been so awful to you and I hate him for it, I do. I hate that I like him at all, I always did."

Severus shrugged, they'd reached the potions class at this point, "It's fine Lily, I guess we can't help who we like."

"I won't let him bully you though Sev, I'll hex him and hate him forever."

"I can handle myself." He huffed, drawing up to his full height.

"Of course you can, but it's what friends do." Hermione told him, knocking his shoulder with hers before letting go of his arm to enter the empty classroom.

"We are still friends aren't we Sev? I mean, we can be friends again right?" Lily asked tentatively.

Severus gave her a wide grin, "Of course."

"TEN!" Hermione shouted as they came in, making him shake his head and bite back a chuckle.

"Ten?" Lily asked. When Hermione explained counting his smiles, she fell into a fit of giggles.

* * *

><p>Harry had been having the time of his life, the memories still haunted his dreams, both happy and terrible filling him with pain but he was happy and young and despite the side project he and Hermione still researched and plotted, he'd never been so free to just be young and have fun. He missed Ron more than anything and he worried about Hermione, but not being the boy-who-lived was remarkably freeing, here he was just another prankster, a marauder. The future, saving the fate of having to save the world still weighed heavily on him but it wasn't as pressing, suffocating or terrifying as it had been. He was prepared for war and had learned to sit back and plan instead of jumping head first with only assumptions and headstrong accusations. He definitely got his stubborn side from his mother, James laughed things off and moved on from things easily, except Lily Evans herself of course, James seemed incapable of moving on from his crush on the red-head, she dominated his thoughts.<p>

He'd known about the way his father had bullied Severus from Snape's own memories but had never seen it in real life and had, not exactly forgotten but not thought about it, shrugging it off as something his father had grown out of so seeing it was hard. He wasn't sure how to react. Then he saw Hermione and Peter squared off but as his wand flicked into his hand he saw Sirius's hand shoot out. Everyone stood in shock as the pudgy boy flew back and landed, blood spurting from his nose. The whole student body currently outside had gone quiet in shock.

Quickly jolting out of his own shock Remus jogged forward and Harry followed him.

When Sirius shoved Severus towards Hermione and told him to get her away from there he'd been ready to take her himself but a quick look told him she was perfectly fine, if as surprised as the others, so he stayed to figure things out.

"You broke my nose." Peter finally spoke again. Sirius angrily flung a spell at the boy snapping the cartilage painfully back into place and making the boy yelp.

"Sirius!" James snapped.

"You ever lift your wand to her again and we're through." Sirius spat at the boy.

"She hexed me first!" He protested wiping his bloody hands on his robe.

Sirius just growled at him and turned to storm away. Peter glanced pleadingly at James but the boy didn't seem to register a decision was being made between his friends as he automatically turned with Sirius and wrapped an arm around the dark boys shoulder, "Alright mate?" Sirius just snorted as they walked towards the castle.

Harry looked from Peter to Remus, the pudgy boy was getting to his feet and angrily swiping at a few stray tears, "You ok Pete?" Remus sighed.

"He punched me, I defended myself and he punched me." Peter fought back tears as he angrily faced the third Marauder.

"More like she defended Severus and you turned on her, I'd have hexed you too." Remus told him rolling his eyes, "Sirius will get over it."

"He punched me." Peter repeated. "James just walked away, asking if _he_ was ok, I'm the one that got punched and they were the ones who started in on the slimy Slytherin git."

"You just followed along, egging them on like usual but you turned your wand on one of ours Pete." Remus shrugged, "You know James would never condone it, that's how you and he met, and Sirius… I'd have done the exact same thing and you know it. You know you were wrong. They'll get over it. Come on and we'll get you cleaned up."

"No." Peter hissed yanking back from the taller boy and wiping the dried tears away again turning away and storming to the school.

Remus shook his head and turned back to Harry, "We should check on Mya."

"She's fine."

"I don't think he sent a mild hex Harry, not if Sirius was that pissed."

"She can defend herself, his spell didn't even come close to touching her." Harry shrugged, "Severus will take care of her anyways."

"They hate him." Remus nods in the direction of his two best friends.

"I don't really know James's problem with him besides his being a Slytherin and how close he was with Lily but Sirius only jumped on board because of James." Harry told him with a shrug. "I don't think it's hate, just years of antagonism." His mind darted to the blond Slytherin, his school nemesis, "It's something they can get past." For months Draco had helped get muggle-born children to safety, found places for people targeted or survivors of attacks. For months, after saving Hermione, killing Greyback and then his own father, the boy had been his friend. Trusted and respected. "Sirius doesn't hate him he's just badly motivated by James to dislike and bully him."

"James and now Mya."

"So it true? He likes her?"

Remus shrugged, "Ask him."

"I'm asking you."

Remus just turned and started walking towards the school, "You're different with her too." Harry pressed. "You glare at Severus when they sit together in the library, you always make a point to sit near her and keep sugar quills in your bag with your chocolate because they're her favorite." Harry pressed.

"So I like her." Remus admitted, "We're just friends."

"Why?"

"It's complicated." Remus shrugged glaring at the ground.

"Because you're a werewolf?" Harry ignored the clear, change the subject, vibe coming from the taller boy.

Remus tripped over his own feet and just barely caught himself from falling as he spun on the Harry, "What?"

"Mya told me." Harry shrugged.

"Mya?" He frowned in question.

Harry chuckled and shook his head, "She's brilliant you know."

"When? I've only transformed twice this year." Harry shrugged again in response. "So you know, have known?"

"Yeah." Harry offered absently before pressing on what he considered an actual topic worth discussing, "So is that why it's complicated or is it because of Sirius."

"Both but you knew?"

"Yeah." Harry laughed, "We know, she's also trying to get information on Damocles new potion, Wolfsbane, for you. It's going to make the transformations easier. She says he'll get the Order of Merlin for it. I guarantee she'll have the potion mastered and be talking Severus into helping her brew it by the New Year."

Remus just shook his head in shock, "So it's ok, with you?"

"If you date my sister?" Harry couldn't help teasing him.

"That I'm… that I'm… a thing."

"Point of advise Moony." Harry stopped him with a hand on his arm, "Don't ever let her hear you say that, the girl can be a bit nutters, especially when it comes to her friends and she wont stand for them being picked on or abused, even if you're doing it to yourself."

"I'm a monster Harry, surely she understands that."

"You're a werewolf Moony, not a monster and I mean it, she can be right scary sometimes, so don't let her hear you putting werewolves down, don't let her hear you put down any creature but especially not yourself."

Remus nodded to stunned to say much, "So what now? I mean it's Halloween, that little incident has kind of put a damper on the day but we can still salvage it."

Harry shot his friend a grin, "Prank Filtch?"

Remus shook his head with a laugh, "Come on, let's find Sirius and James."


	11. Chapter 11

All four boys ended up in detention for three nights. Lily studied with Severus and Hermione in the library and the two girls were finally able to grow close. Something that made Harry extremely happy, Hermione needed female friends. At home she'd had Ginny and Luna to an extent but for the most part, she'd just been with him and Ron. As happy as it made him, it was also hard, Hermione had never not been at his side.

Tuesday Peter had ignored them all but Wednesday he went to sit with them again; it was clear things weren't the same though. He didn't jump to agree with anything James said and sat away from Sirius. Mostly though things settled down.

It was two more weeks before Hermione and Harry were able to transform, her into the same chocolate brown cat she'd seen in her vision and he into a beautiful falcon. Immediately he took flight with a cry to the moon. Hermione smirked in her cat form, of course he'd be a bird, no wonder he could fly the way he could right from the first instant he got on a broom, he was at home in the air. They were birds of speed and agility, focus, intelligence, prophecy, power and determination. Birds were always a symbol of freedom and change, of hope, all things Harry had always been a symbol of too.

Hermione was amused to find an odd growth pattern in his feathers gave him a lightening bolt on the right side above his beak to his forehead just in front of his eye.

They agreed not to tell anyone until the full moon and surprise the boys. They also weren't planning on registering until after they were sure Voldemort was dead, completely dead, and not returning but Hermione, rule followers as she was, insisted that once it was safe they'd register properly.

So on the 25th of November they waited until the other boys had snuck out and Harry jumped out his window and tapped on Hermione's. She slipped out and down to the common room, transforming to slink through the halls and outside.

Harry flew and landed on James's antlers startling the buck and making Peter scurry back to the base of the whomping willow in fright. Sirius huffed out a doggy laugh until Hermione bounded up to him and sat with a glare. Understanding flowed through them as the animals recognized each other and soon Remus had joined them. Harry took flight and Hermione wound around the werewolves foot before meowing and darting into the woods. Sirius immediately took chase with Remus and then James following last. Peter was never able to keep up with them but they quickly circled back from the run and all played together. As soon as the sky began to light they lay down and waited for Remus to become human, huddling close to keep him warm from the November cold. Quickly Sirius transformed and grabbed clothes they kept near and covered his friend. Human again the five friends met Hermione at the school steps; she'd left to give Remus privacy once the change started, knowing he wouldn't keep his clothes like they did.

Exhaustion was replaced by renewed excitement as the boys discussed the addition to their secret. James proclaimed them both true marauders now and immediately demanded the creation of names.

"Whiskers?" Remus nudged Hermione chuckling.

"Meow." James suggested, "Or Puss."

"Fluffy." Peter suggested, making Harry and Hermione share a small smile of remembrance but shake their heads no.

"Kitten." Sirius told him winking at her, "She's always been Kitten."

"To you." She agreed with a blush, because she had been, in both of her lives.

"Kitten isn't really very subtle." Peter offered.

"Neither is Prongs or Moony." Sirius shrugged and insisted. "She's Kitten."

"To you mate, but do you really want us all calling her that?" James chuckled, "Let's go with Whiskers."

"What about Harry?" Sirius conceded to his friends point on Hermione's new nickname, James was right, she could only be Kitten to him.

"Flappy." James suggested.

"Tweety." Remus chuckled making Hermione and Harry both laugh and shake their heads.

"Hell no." Harry told him with a shove.

"Zippy." Peter offered.

"Wings." Sirius rolled his eyes at them.

"Obviously." James snorted shoving his friend.

"Welcome to the Marauders Wings and Whiskers." The boys laughed wandering in for an early breakfast.

The joy of the morning was shattered when James was led away by the Headmaster, "You should come too Mr. Black." Dumbledore requested, leading the boys out.

An hour later the boys were found hiding in the dorm, James curled in his bed and Sirius hexing or throwing things between stomping around.

"Sirius?" Hermione bravely moved closer to the raging and angry teen. He shot tear filled eyes at her and ripped another page out of his sketchbook.

"My mum died last night, dragonpox." James croaked, "Dad followed this morning."

Harry grabbed Peter and whispered, "Get Lily." Then moved to the bed and sank down, he hadn't ever really thought much about his grandparents. They might have even been at the train station in September and he never even saw them. Remus moved to Sirius but the boy shoved his friend away and threw the remains of the journal at the wall before blasting it.

"Why couldn't it be someone who deserved it! Someone hateful!" He shouted spinning on Remus, "WHY COULDN'T IT BE THEM!" He blasted the last name on his trunk.

Hermione moved to him, shrugging off Remus's cautious hand and slid right up to Sirius, pulling his stiff body into a hug from behind before sliding around, under his arm and resting her head on his chest, hugging him tightly and breathing him in, not saying anything, just holding on. His body slowly relaxed and he clung to her, dropping his head to bury it in her shoulder, hiding his face in her waist length hair as he cried.

Hermione heard Lily led in by Peter but didn't look up, she heard the bed springs move, Harry shifting positions or Lily sitting, she wasn't sure, she just held onto Sirius.

Later, Peter and Remus raided the kitchens and brought snacks and tea, or Peter did, Remus snuck into Hogsmeade and returned with firewhiskey, to add to the tea, and chocolate, his cure all, comfort food.

By this time Hermione was lying on Sirius's bed, the dark boy wrapped around her, like she was a lifeline, his head still buried in her hair.

Harry sat next to Lily on the other bed and James had his head in her lap while she ran her fingers through his hair, tears staining quiet paths down his cheeks in unrestrained grief. Peter was uncomfortable with the grief and hovered on his bed, eating. Remus got on the bed with Hermione and Sirius, resting a hand on his friend's shoulder but said nothing, following the twins lead. They had after all know more grief and understood this better than anyone, even him, he'd lost only one parent and that had been painful enough. None of them went to a single class that day and neither of the other two seventh year Griffindor boy's returned, opting to sleep in the common room and give them privacy.

They sat in silence for a while before Harry shook himself and made them all spiked tea. "What were they like?" Harry finally asked in a whisper.

"The best parents in the universe." Sirius mumbled from where his face remained tucked in the back of Hermione's neck.

"They are… were." James agreed in a choked voice. "I was their miracle kid. Mum always wanted a big family but couldn't ever seem to get pregnant. The one other time she did, before me, she miscarried."

"She accepted me into the family that very first Christmas. Then fifth year when I was actually disowned by my own crappy elitist blood obsessed freakshow family, she took me as her own son."

"You were her son first year." James contradicted, "She just gave herself an excuse to do you up your own room at our house and say it out loud once you were living with us."

"Your dad started calling me son."

"They were proud of you." James told him, "To have you as their kid." He forced a weak smile, "Not as proud as they were of me, I was first and all."

Sirius snorted out a watery laugh and finally lifted his head a little, "Please, I was the favorite."

"Not a chance." James teased back. "That's why I had the bigger room." Slowly they began to tell stories and Sirius loosened his grip on Hermione a little. They picked at food and drank all the tea and firewhiskey, eventually falling asleep. In the morning,

Hermione tried to slip from the bed but Sirius's arms automatically tightened and he woke, "Don't leave." He whispered pleadingly.

"Come with me." She whispered back. With a look to James, sleeping between Lily and Harry, Sirius gave a sad smile and nodded. They tried not to wake Remus, curled on the bottom of the enlarged bed they'd made of the boys two beds the night before and slipped out. Peter was asleep in his own bed and Frank and Adam were asleep on the couches. Quietly they made their way outside and Hermione led him to the lake to watch the last of the sunset.

"Are you always up this early?" Sirius yawned.

"I have trouble sleeping." She admitted, "So does Harry. He'll be out before long, he was awake when we left."

"What were your parents like?"

"Supportive and loving but absent. The truth is, Harry and I are as close as we are because we weren't together until we were eleven. Neither of us even knew we were magic. The people who raised me worked a lot and expected a lot from me. Even as a child everything had to be tidy and organized at home, routines properly kept, I didn't know until later that it was a bit of a cold place to grow up, emotionally I mean. Instead of hugs I got smiles and pats on the back for my achievements. They loved me, bought me books and took me to the museums and though they didn't understand magic they were supportive of me being a unique child. They died in a car crash though and Harry, he was raised by the opposite, they were cruel and hateful to him, my relatives didn't know I was magic but they knew I was special and encouraged it. His knew he was a wizard and despised him, called him a freak and never explained about magic. When we were finally with our true family, with each other, it was different." Hermione smiled thinking of the Weasley's. "They were loud and everything was chaos all the time, but everyone was warm and affectionate and loving." She bit back tears, "They were the best family in the universe."

"I'm sorry Mya."

"So am I." She told him, taking his hand, "I know the Potters loved you, you were their son, but Sirius…"

"What?"

"You're also a Black." He frowned and turned away from her to glare at the lake, he hadn't let go of her hand, his grip was tight with his tension so she lifted her free hand and rested it on his arm, "You are strong and good and brave and kind, even more so _because_ you're a Black." He turned back to her, his glare shifting into confusion, "You're a…" Hermione frowned in thought as she tried to word it, "It's easier to be brave and strong when you're surrounded by brave and strong people who support you. Being brave and kind, being different from everyone around you takes a lot more. Be proud of who you are, where came from, because you came out of that darkness and hate, with light and love in your heart. It's the epitome of hope, bravery and strength. To do more than survive darkness but to overcome it and really live."

Sirius smiled "If a girl like you thinks nice things about me, they must be true." he told her and tucked her into his side as the sun rose completely above the edge of the lake.

Sirius and James both left after breakfast, the funeral would be the next morning. When they returned to class on Tuesday, students were all supportive but the boys were quick to shrug off their sympathy. Neither wanted to wallow in the grief and when they did, it was a private thing, shared only with each other though James would more often than not be found with a supportive Lily and by Christmas the pair were a couple.

Peter was the only one of their group to go home for the holidays but all the rest of Gryffindor had cleared out.

"Sev!" Hermione called out to the Slytherin boy jogging to catch up to him, though he'd stopped to wait for her.

"I already know." He told her with a glare.

"Know?"

"About Lily and James." He spat, turning on his heal to start walking again.

"That." Hermione sighed, "I'm sorry Sev."

"No you aren't."

"Not for them but for you, I know how you feel about her."

"It doesn't matter."

"Of course it does."

She reached out but he jerked away, "Is that all?"

"Huh? Oh, no." She shook her head; "I wasn't looking for you about that. Are you staying here for the holidays?"

"Where else would I go with no family or friends?"

"Lily and I are your friends."

"Are either of you inviting me home for the holiday?"

"We're both staying here. You know I only have Harry and Lily's parents are gone to meet her sister's fiance's family." He just glared at her, "Right, so ok, then will you help me brew a really difficult sort of experimental potion?"

"Sure." He shrugged. "Which one?"

"Wolfsbane."

He turned to glare at her, "You know what he is then?"

"Yes." She grinned, "So will you help me help him?"

"No."

"Why?"

"I hate them and they hate me."

"You don't hate Remus and he doesn't hate you, besides you're my friend and Lily's friend and they're my friends and Lily _is_ dating James."

"So?"

"So wouldn't it be nice if we all were?"

"No."

"You don't hate Remus."

"So?"

"So, it's for him not James."

"Fine."

"Really."

"If you'll stop pestering me about it, yes."

"Great." She took his arm making him stop walking and leaned up on tiptoes to peck his cheek, "Thank you Sev. I knew I could count on you." Then she turned and hurried down the hall and away from the shocked boy who stood staring after her.


	12. Chapter 12

"What did you do to Severus?" Lily demanded when she entered the common room that night, dropping next to James.

"Nothing!" He immediately insisted.

"Not you." She waved at him, "Mya."

"Me?" She frowned at her friend.

"She kissed him." Alice announced with a laugh joining the group.

"WHAT!" Sirius's head spun to her so fast it could cause whiplash.

Remus's mouth fell open in shock as he looked at her, "You and Snape?"

"Marauders not good enough for you?" Peter hissed.

Hermione shot him a glare fingering her wand, he blanched and shot a look to James but he was just staring at his female friend, completely ignoring Peter "Please say that isn't true Whiskers."

Hermione rolled her eyes and shook her head, "He agreed to help me with a complex potion, I thanked him."

"With a kiss!" Alice squealed.

"Ok," Frank moved over and lifted his girlfriend to her feet, "Time to go before there is crossfire."

"Oh hush." She shoved away from her long time boyfriend and turned back to Hermione, "Penny saw it herself, PENNY!"

"What?" Penny asked coming down the stairs holding a sweater, "Can I borrow this? I have a family dinner thing and its perfect."

"Take whatever." Alice waved at her friend, "Just tell us about Mya and Severus kissing."

Penny smirked at Hermione, "Was it a secret? Kissing him in the hall wasn't very discrete."

"There is no secret, he agreed to help me and I thanked him, nothing happened." She rolled her eyes, "I've done the same to Harry."

"Kissed me?" Harry frowned at her.

"On the cheek."

"Oh." Harry shrugged, "Was it about _the_ potion." He lifted his eyebrows in emphasis.

"Yes."

"He said yes?"

"Of course." Hermione grinned at him. "He's my friend, I never doubted he'd help."

"You know he likes you right?" Harry chuckled.

"You know who he's in love with right?" She contradicted.

"You're under his skin now too though."

"Am not."

"Yeah right, like we don't know anyone else who's got a thing for you right?"

Hermione frowned at him, "I don't."

"He means Remus." "He means Sirius." Penny and Alice spoke at once.

Hermione blushed while Lily laughed and the two girls glared at each other.

"She's Sirius's."

"Remus's."

"Sirius's, he watches her all the time, I bet that's what he draws all the time."

"Remus studies with her and sits next to her all the time."

"Sirius punched Peter."

"Remus hexed Chase when he was talking about scoring with her."

"Yeah but _Peter_, Sirius hit Peter over her."

"Yeah but Remus never hexes people less skilled than him like that." The girls continued to argue.

"They both like her." Lily finally interrupted with a laugh, "Why do you think neither has made a move?"

The girls both stared at Lily and then looked at Hermione and back to Lily before focusing on the Marauders themselves.

"Good plan boys."

"Leave a catch like Mya on the market."

"Now a Slytherin's caught her up." Penny laughed.

Alice just shook her head at them and frowned at the sweater in her friend's hand, "How are you not packed yet?"

"You haven't helped me."

Alice laughed and nodded, "Fine, let's go."

"So, that was, um, yeah, ok." Frank nodded nervously as he broke the silence and clapped his hands, "I'm going to find Adam and just, _not_ be here." He chuckled as he left.

"Well that's not awkward at all." Harry laughed.

"Shut up Harry." Hermione huffed getting up in a snit and disappearing up the girls staircase.

Lily bit back a smile and got up, "It would serve you right if she did date someone else." She told them both disappearing up the steps after her.

"I'm with Lily on that." Harry told them leaning back in his seat and pulling a snitch out, letting it go and catching it again and again.

"You can't be ok with her being with that greasy snarky basement dwelling, snake!" Sirius raged at his friend.

Harry shrugged, catching the snitch again and turning to him with a smirk, "If she's happy."

Sirius stared at him wide eyed before turning on James, "Fix that." He waved at Harry.

"Fix what?" James asked him perplexed.

"Your doppelganger is broken." This statement made all the boys laugh.

"Why didn't you just ask her out yourself?" James asked with a lifted brow.

"One of you should have." Harry added playing with the snitch again.

"I'm…" Remus's voice dropped, "Moony."

Harry rolled his eyes, "I really can't wait for you to say something stupid like that to her."

"What's so special about her anyways? She's clearly deranged and, and" Whatever he was going to add was cut off at the glare Sirius was sending him.

"Finish that thought at your peril." James laughed. Peter shot his friend a hurt look but just shut his mouth.

Harry sat up looking from James to Sirius to Peter and back then jumped up and called up the steps, "My?"

* * *

><p>Hermione had flopped on her bed, watching Penny and Alice pack, Lily came in a only a minute after her, "You really had no clue?"<p>

"We're friends." Hermione insisted.

"Have you seriously missed the sex eyes Sirius gives you?" Penny laughed, "It drives the entire population of sixth and seventh year girls insane because nothing we did made him notice any of us. I've forgiven you of course but Laura in Hufflepuff cried when she thought you two were snogging in secret passages."

"Why do you think Remus is always touching you and giving you sweets?" Alice adds. "He's so adorably oblivious to how cute he is, Frank's actually shown a tiny jealous side because I can't even help sighing over him sometimes."

"He doesn't even like sugar quills." Penny agreed. "Giving in a little on which wizard might be the wizard for the pretty petite female bookworm marauder."

"Sirius is totally sketching her in his notebook too, I've seen him look over the rim at her as he draws." Alice added.

"Yeah because they both like you Mya." Lily chuckled.

"My?" Harry's muffled voice drifted up the steps. Instantly she was up and going down. Without a word they left the common room. He led her to the ROR and paced before opening the door and motioning her inside.

"Do you think Peter's gay?"

"What?" Hermione frowned.

"I think he's in love with James and that's why he betrayed them. He got James back for not loving him, Lily for getting him and Sirius because, even platonically James loves him."

Hermione frowned in thought and slowly nodded, "Maybe."

Harry groaned, "I was kind of hoping you'd tell me I was nuts."

"Sorry, but the whole twisted love triangle sort of makes sense, I can't really see another reason for him to betray James."

"Speaking of twisted love triangles…" Hermione blushed and looked at her hands, "Or love quadrangles?"

"Harry!"

"What?" He laughed, "You know for once I can't actually tell what you're thinking without having to ask. I can't even tell if you really like one of them or if they're all just… what I used to be to you."

"Used to be?"

"We aren't exactly best friends anymore Mya, I mean, I know we aren't really twins who grew up with separate relatives and then went to the Weasley's to be reunited when we were eleven but it feels real. More real than our past, you are my twin sister My."

Hermione smiled at him and nodded, "I know what you mean. I know the little changes we made to the truth but even though I know it I don't really remember it that way anymore."

"You figure its part of the loop spell thing?"

"Yeah." She nodded.

"We're way off topic." He finally shook his head.

"About Peter being in love with James."

"About you maybe liking Sirius or Remus or Severus and just so you know, I am totally good with any of them. I don't know Severus well and I completely misjudged Snape so I have no real conception of who he is except your friend."

"I like all three of them Harry, and Lily and Alice and Frank. All our friends here."

"My." He frowned at her.

"Remus is smart and funny and he's Tonks's husband. Sirius is your godfather and Professor Snape, is there really anything else to say about that?"

"No, Professor Lupin was married to Tonks and we don't know that they'll be together, maybe he'll be with you or someone else and no matter how much he and our Tonks loved each other, this will be the true love of his life. Besides he wont be the same man My, we won't let him be and he shouldn't have to be alone. None of them should be. Sirius is my friend, not my godfather and Snape isn't our professor he's your friend Severus. Let go of the past future Mya, all of it, we have to."

"It's not just that." She half yelled spinning away from him.

"Mya?" It was a question but pain, regret, sorrow and dread filled him because he knew without her saying. Anger flooded him and he yanked her around glaring at her, "Don't you dare." He hissed, "Don't you dare let what he did destroy any part of you. Not one tiny piece! If I could kill that fucking werewolf bastard I would and it would be painful, far more painful than how Draco ended him!" The rage flowed through him and into her, darkness rising and writhing in them both as magic pulsed through them.

The words of the hat during her sorting flashed in her mind, _One cannot live where the other doesn't. Live in darkness and forward will rise darkness, live in light and love will reign. _"Harry." She breathed out the anger and gripped his hands in hers, trying to send him calm.

He seemed to shake the dark emotions off himself and she gave him a weak smile.

_Be careful though the damaged spot in your heart, rising and twisting and dark. Do not be afraid of life or love. _"I care about all three of them, I just, I know they like me, of course I do but they're best friends and neither seem to want more and I do like Sev but he's still in love with Lily. Not a single one of them is ready even if I were sure and I'm not. I like them all, in different ways, more than just friends but, I'm not sure yet."

"That's ok."

"No, it isn't, I need to let myself be open to loving one of them or someone else."

"I maybe like a girl."

"Sophie, from Ravenclaw." She smiled, "I know."

The response made Harry chuckle, "Of course you do."

They spent a few hours together, trying to figure out what to do and how to save people, to change things, they knew they couldn't save everyone but they wanted to try. Forgiving Peter for the things he hadn't done yet was hard from the beginning, it should have been easier, coming to understand why, but seeing the first signs playing out just made it harder. After all, they couldn't make James love him back anymore than Severus could make Lily love him.


	13. Chapter 13

The next morning the dorm was a mess of activity as people all left, running about to grab last minute things, say goodbyes or handing out presents wrapped in haste. Finally though the school was quiet with only a few students remaining.

"Let's play in the snow."

"We just sat down." Remus smirked at Sirius.

"So?"

"Lily?" James grinned at his girlfriend.

"I'll build a snowman." She smiled back.

The group bundled up and headed outside, Hermione and Lily all insisted they be made by hand rather than magic. Remus and Sirius were quick to agree as soon as Hermione agreed with Lily and James was the first to jump on board with Lily's suggestion making Harry laugh and shake his head at them all.

They ended up in a snowball fight with the Ravenclaws and went in wet and chilled to supper. It took Sirius one day after that to have to much energy to contain himself so Hermione rolled her eyes at him and gave him an early Christmas present.

He ripped into the paper with relish and found a new leather sketchbook with Sirius monogrammed on the cover. He grinned at her and caught the package flying at his head from Remus, the muggle graphite and charcoal set he loved and Remus replaced for him every Christmas. He grinned and sank into an armchair by the fire and suddenly his body went still, his whole being seemed to sigh and relax as charcoal met paper, his forehead crinkled lightly and his gray eyes seemed almost silvery steel blue in the firelight. Hermione smiled softly at him, watching, before turning back to her notes. Every once in a while, she'd hear the gentle tapping of the end of his pencil on the page and glance up to see him pausing to look at the page before drawing again. By the time an hour had passed and the fifth tap, tap, tap of his pencil end had drawn her attention, she had given up the research and sat watching him. There was something beautiful about him when he drew and she realized this was something else his future self had lost, not just the youthful energy or playful mysterious smirk and carefree attitude but this intensity, concentration, this beauty. Sirius Black was who he was without excuse or apology, he wasn't as boisterous or in your face as James could be about it with his I'm here, this is me, I am amazing vibes. Sirius was quieter about it, mysterious, he felt no need to announce himself, there was nothing obnoxious in his confidence, he didn't care if people liked him or didn't because he knew who he was.

"Mya?" Lily asked gently.

Hermione blushed, "I might have fallen a little in love with him like that." Hermione admitted in a whisper.

Lily looked over at Sirius with a slight smile, "I swear when he's sketching or sleeping is the only time he stops moving."

"Remus says not even when he's sleeping." Hermione remembered making Lily chuckle.

"I bet you five quid it's you." Lily teased.

Hermione studied Sirius a moment and then nodded, "Think he'll let us look?"

Lily smirked and stood up, motioning her to follow and quietly they moved up behind Sirius but as soon as a shadow touched the page or maybe he saw movement from the corner of his eye, the book was closed and he was grinning at them, "Ready to play a game?"

Lily and Hermione laughed, "Can we see?" Lily asked pointing to the book.

Sirius shook his head, "Nope, it's a present."

"What's it of?"

"You'll see." Sirius grinned. "Now." He clapped and jumped up, "Let's play something fun!"

Hermione grinned at him but shook her head, "I'm meeting Severus but I'll see you all later."

"What are you two brewing anyways?" Lily asked with a frown.

"A special Christmas present for Remus."

"Does it make everything taste like chocolate?" Lily laughed.

"No but that _would_ be brilliant." Hermione chuckled as she gathered her things and went to find Severus, she still had half an hour but if she got caught up playing a game she'd be late.

He was already there when she arrived.

"I swear I'm early." She told him with a frown.

He smirked and nodded at a cauldron, "This is for something else."

"Can I help?"

"No." He shook his head, "Only I can touch it at this stage. It can go in stasis in ten minutes if you want to start setting up, we can begin your project then." She nodded and began to take out ingredients and set up another counter space before settling in to wait for him to finish.

"Sirius." She told herself with a nod from where she'd been sitting on one of the benches watching him a little while later.

"What?" Severus asked looking up at her, to the door and back to her with a glare.

"I was thinking you remind me of Sirius sketching when you brew. You guys have the same level of concentration and intensity."

"Do not compare me to that…that… knobhead if you want to remain friends."

She giggled, "knobhead?" He just glared so she shook her head biting back the laughter, "Ok." She told him with hands raised. "Sorry."

"Are you dating him?" Severus asked quietly once he'd finished his task and was focused on the potion.

"No." She told him gently, honestly. "I might like him though."

"Might?"

"It's complicated."

"No it isn't."

"You love Lily." She reminded him gently, his hand clenched on the ladle he stirred with but he said nothing, "If you started to like someone else, wouldn't it be complicated?"

"Do you love someone else?"

"No. I might have once but no. I just, I'm not sure how I feel about him or if I like someone else or no one."

"Remus isn't terrible. I don't hate him." At this response Hermione giggled. Severus sighed and glared into his potion, "I _could_ like someone else, since Lily doesn't love me back."

"One day, I hope you'll love somebody else."

"Maybe." They let the topic drop and continued to brew in quiet.

"Mya?" Severus questioned softly as they tidied up, having reached a point that the the potion would need to sit nine hours before the next stage.

"Sev?"

"You're sort of tolerable to be around."

"Thanks." She offered with a frown.

Severus shook his head, "I mean, because you're friends with them. It's sort of tolerable still, to be your friend."

The frown faded into a smile as she caught his meaning, he'd tolerate them for her. That's why he was brewing wolfsbane with her, not for Remus but for her.

"Even if I dated one of them?"

"The animal would be preferable." He sniffed. "But I suppose since Lily already loves the worst of the lot Sirius wouldn't be _that_ bad."

"Thanks Sev."

"You know that pudgy little prig scampering after them is trouble though right?"

Hermione nodded slowly, "He's not my favorite person."

"He's cruel Mya." Severus shook his head, "Not in the I hate James and Sirius they're utter prats and dunderheads and numpty muppets way but in the generally and not completely accurately way that's associated with my house."

"What happened?"

"Not much, he's to chicken shite to do anything without them lot." Severus shook his head, "Honest though, I've no idea why he was sorted Gryffindor. Maybe because Slytherins would eat him alive and he wasn't kind enough for Badger or smart enough for Raven. Point is, watch out for him, he's not sly enough to be sneaky but he's… just be careful not to trust him because he'll never come at you face to but he'll go behind your back with a knife."

"You know, the more you actually talk to me, the more British you sound."

"I am British." He glared at her.

"Yes but I mean like a regular teen," she chuckled shaking her head, "Come on Sev, numpty muppets? Were you in the East End of muggle London recently?"

"My dolt father was and a shite stereotype on the sick after running through my mothers inheritance and driving the estate into ruin." He reminded her, "I might be educated and a wizard but I _am_ British, out of the East End." He rolled his eyes glaring at her, "I learned two things from my father, a foul mouth and to never show emotion."

"That's sad."

"Which part."

"Both." She shook her head, "I do promise to watch out for Peter though, I sort of had a similar opinion anyways."

"Yeah well you pay attention. You and Harry both and you're sly, him especially. He could have been Slytherin whereas you'd fit with the Raven's, I'd bet the hat put you where you'd be together as much as for your sickening Gryffindor traits."

"I never know when you're complimenting or insulting me."

"Usually both." He shrugged making her laugh. "Stop that now, someone might think I'm amusing and I like being left alone."

"It's holidays almost no one is here."

"Regardless." He glared at her.

"Sev?"

"What?"

"I like you too."

He fought a smile as he glared at her, "Go away you insufferable know-it-all."

"See you tomorrow to finish the potion?"

"Obviously, and don't be late, timing is important and we need to complete the next step at ten ten." He called after her once she was at the end of the hall. "Mya?"

"Sev?"

"If I could not love her I might love you but I'm glad I don't."

"Why?"

"I'll never have to lose you."

"You never have to lose either of us." She called back with a wave before turning and heading back up the steps.

Severus shook his head and glared around the hall incase any others were around before sweeping away in a billow of cloak down the hall to his common room. He glared at the few younger years staying and playing some game in the common before going up to his room.


	14. Chapter 14

The full moon fell on Christmas day this year so while there was excitement every year, Remus and in turn his friends were even more restless. They woke up early and Hermione looked at the packages at the bottom of her bed. No lumpy package with a sweater from Mrs. Weasley, no hastily wrapped candy or trinket from Ron, no books from her parents, no harmless little prank from the twins like a rubber ball that bounced and exploded in confetti to sing Christmas carols or fake wand that became flowers. There was no lip-gloss or pretty new stud earrings from Ginny. She bit back the wave of anguish as a tap tap on her window brought her attention it.

Pulling it open she let Harry in, "It's harder today." He told her, "Seeing the presents and thinking of them."

Hermione nodded in agreement as he pulled her into his arms while she fought back the tears. After a minute he pulled back and smiled sadly at her, "Merry Christmas Mione."

"Merry Christmas Harry." She choked out at the old nickname, he hadn't used since Ron… they held each other another moment before she pushed away and sniffled. "I'm going to get washed up, meet you down in the common room to open together?"

"Ten minutes." He agreed.

Back in his own dorm a quick flight later he transformed back on top of James, the only one still sleeping.

The boy grunted at the weight and groaned, "I'm awake Sirius."

"Oi, that time it isn't me!" Sirius laughed shaking his damp hair to spray them all like a dog.

Harry bounced up, "Come on, Mya's meeting us downstairs to open gifts."

"Lily!" James jumped up and flew to his trunk flinging things out.

"You got her a gift Prongs." Sirius laughed.

"You even wrapped it." Remus reminded him.

"Ah ha!" James pulled the package out with a grin, "And here it is." Then he looked from one friend to another, "What if she doesn't like it?"

"She will." Harry assured him, "I promise." He remembered the necklace from one of the few photos he'd ever seen of her and smiled at the memory and at the hope for the future. "Come on."

The boys clambered down the steps and found Lily and Hermione both waiting by the fire. Harry carefully handed out the presents and then sat and looked at his friends waiting for someone to go first. Presents never lost their appeal to him, he'd only been getting them the last seven years and he loved to give things as much as to open them.

"Sirius." Remus nodded to his friend and then smirked at Harry, "He can never sit still long enough unless he opens first."

"Gets to excited by what he got us." James laughed.

Sirius just scowled at them, "I love all my presents too."

"So open them." Lily smiled at him.

Sirius grinned back and picked through them until he found one from her, "Love Lily." He smirked, "Hear that Prongs, your girl loves me."

"We're brothers, she has to." James shot back with a laugh.

Sirius opened the package and winked at Lily, "Whoa Lily!" He exclaimed pulling out the large wood case and opening it, carefully picking out a colored pencil before putting it back and selecting another, "There's every color in every shade imaginable!" He beamed at her and then waved at Remus, "They're all like your pen-cells but with so many colors!"

Remus shook his head and chuckled while Lily beamed at him, "I'm glad you like it Sirius."

"I _love_ it!" He lovingly ran a hand over them before carefully shutting the wood case.

"Lily's turn." James turned to her.

"Sirius hasn't opened all of his." She protested.

"One at a time." Sirius rolled his eyes fingers twitching to the boxed set of coloured pencils.

"Attention span thing again?" Harry laughed.

"For all of us." James grinned with a laugh, "Go on Lils."

"Ok." Lily reached into her pile without looking, "Harry and Hermione."

Opening it she found a lovely leather arm holster for her wand, with a Lily in gold stitching.

"Go on Harry." Hermione urged, she'd always loved watch him get presents, giving _anything_ to Harry was always fun, he was always so surprised and happy.

Harry grinned at her and purposely chose the one from her, "A NEWT study planner?" He winked making her laugh. Carefully he opened it. In the box was a chess piece, a black knight on a leather cuff. He looked up at her and swallowed, nodding, "Thank you Mya."

She smiled tightly back as they both remembered that first life and death adventure they shared with the missing third of their trio. Ron playing as the black knight, sacrificing himself to win the game and get them across the board.

She shook off the emotion and smiled at the group, pulling a package to her, "Love Sev." She grinned at Lily while they boys rolled their eyes and Harry motioned for them to be quiet.

Tearing open the package she found a clearly used leather bound journal, opening it she saw meticulous notes copied out with clear instructions and grinned.

"What is it?" Lily asked leaning closer.

"He wrote me a potions text." Hermione handed her the journal to see. It must have taken him hours to do, the writing was careful and precise and he'd drawn some diagrams or pictures of certain ingredients.

James went next since he hadn't gone yet and had a new pair of dragon hide boots from Sirius. Remus went last and pulled out a shrunken broom from James and Sirius, it expanded to its real size when he opened it and he sat holding the latest and fastest racing broom.

"No way." He protested. "It's to much."

"It's a joint gift." James argued.

Sirius just shrugged and grinned at him, "Just accept we love you too much and have too much money to spend and say thank you because you deserve it for keeping us alive and out of to much trouble the last seven years."

"Yeah." James grinned, "Sirius and I would have gotten ourselves expelled by third year without you around."

"Third?" Remus lifted a questioning brow.

"Ok second, at least give us second." James laughed.

"Go on then Sirius, but don't expect I got you anything this good."

"You got me through seven years at school."

"Almost." Remus rolled his eyes.

"There is still a last semester to go out with a bang." James laughed rubbing his hands together.

"Go on and open already." Harry urged Sirius.

"Technically I opened two already a couple days ago so I'll skip. You open mine next Lily."

"No way." Remus picked up a gift, "Mine was only half your gift."

Sirius shook his head, "Those are the best charcoal pen-cells mate, and the tin case is perfect to keep them safe and with my sketch book. I'm always losing or breaking quills but those are safe."

"Just open it." Remus rolled his eyes.

Sirius grinned and opened the case inside was a silver belt buckle with a black paw on it, he laughed and showed it around thanking Remus, the wolf always gave him muggle gifts and he loved it.

Lily went again and gaped at Sirius, "Its…"

"You did want to see what I was sketching." He grinned at her. "Like it?"

Lily nodded and grinned down at the picture of her surrounded by Lilies, a stag standing at the edge of the frame while magic flowed out of her wand giving the impression she was casting a levitation charm on the flowers around her.

"I guess you owe me five quid." Hermione teased, amazed at the detail of the drawing and just a little jealous of the gift.

"Not really." Sirius smirked, "Open yours!" He bounced.

"Go on." Remus nodded, "He'll get twitchy until you do." They chuckled as Sirius was practically bouncing as his fingers drummed against one of the packages in front of him, he was nervous about these gifts having made them instead of bought.

Hermione dug through and found her present from Sirius, opening it carefully. She knew it was framed like Lily's and probably spelled against tearing but she couldn't help but be gentle with it.

Tears stung her eyes, she was sitting in profile looking out at the lake, in her lap, the head of a large black dog rested while her hand was resting on his head. It was done in charcoal but the mist on the lake and light to dark sky gave the impression of predawn. Her expression was peaceful and in different ways she seemed both sad and happy. The way her mouth curved up though she wasn't smiling but something in the way he'd done her eyes made her seem almost but not sad either. Every detail was perfect, her long hair up in a ponytail curling gently down her back, the graceful line of her neck.

"It's beautiful Sirius."

He grinned at her and made a flipping motion with his hand. Frowning she turned it over, on the back was another little box. She pealed it off and opened it. Inside there was a delicate gold necklace with a circular pendant on it. _To keep you safe from nightmares and remind you, love can light the way through any dark. I'll always be there to chase away the darkest night and welcome the dawn with you. _

She read the tag to herself before looking up and meeting his gray eyes, "Thank you Sirius."

"Your welcome Kitten." He winked at her but his eyes were serious instead of teasing and his smile warm.

Carefully she drew the necklace out and put it on while Harry took his turn. Finally they came to her gift to Remus, the last to be opened, and she grinned at him as he read the card.

"This vial times twelve. Love Hermione and with semi-reluctant help, from Severus, Happy Christmas least awful marauder." Remus read out the tag, chuckled and shook his head as he opened the small box and grinned at her, "Thank you Hermione, even it doesn't do anything, thank you for trying."

"It will help, I promise." She grinned at him.

"What's the potion for?" Lily asked looking around, no one wanted to lie to her, "Oh… that." She nodded, "I should have guessed before. It's still very experimental Hermione, are you sure its safe for him?"

"What do you mean oh, that?" James sputtered. Remus was just gaping at her trying to decide if she knew what he thought she knew.

"It's wolfsbane, isn't it?" Lily asked Hermione second-guessing.

"Yup."

"You know? You knew?" James demanded.

Lily rolled her eyes at him, "I did make head girl for a reason. I happen to be rather intelligent. I also have my suspicions about three, come to think of it, now five, marauders also exhausted after each full moon but since that would be illegal those suspicions are clearly completely false and imagined, aren't they _Prongs?_"

"Completely, sort of, kind of, absolutely." He offered.

Lily huffed, biting back laughter, "Right, well, just be careful. It's a wonderful gift Hermione and Severus is going to be an amazing potions master one day but…"

"It's safe and it'll work Lily. I promise. I'd never put Remus at risk."

"Of course not." She conceded with a smile.

"Take it now." Hermione told him glancing at her watch, "Oh." She stopped him, "It tastes terrible but don't ever mix it with anything, you just have to choke it down."

Remus nodded and took it quickly grimacing and coughing at the taste, "This better not be a prank so Severus can get back at us." He finally got out.

Hermione rolled her eyes, "We'd have given the potion to James."

"Not with Lily dating him." Remus contradicted.

"Sirius then." Lily mused, "You are, what did he write, the least awful one."

"It's almost a compliment from him." Hermione mused.

"Exactly." Lily agreed making both girls giggle.

"He told me I was tolerable." Hermione told Lily making her chuckle.

"In the potions room, that's highest praise."

"True." Hermione grinned back as they carried their gifts up to the girls' dorm. The rest of the holiday passed in easy friendship and lighthearted laziness.


	15. Chapter 15

Peter came back from the holidays but spent as much time doing his own thing as following James and Sirius around. They still pulled some pranks but all in fun, they'd grown out of bullying students and James spent most of his time with Lily who wouldn't stand for her boyfriend picking on anyone, even if it was just in fun. When words were exchanged either in banter between Quidditch teams or just gossiping amongst themselves, Peter would sometimes snap out a particularly nasty thing and be admonished. Slowly he was included less. They'd never really sought him out to include him so it wasn't like they were actively giving him the cold shoulder, mostly they just overlooked his absence, only shouting for him to join them plot a prank. In March he didn't show up for the full moon, nothing was said about it but it was clear to them what had been clear to other students since January, Peter had drifted from his friends.

Almost every morning that Hermione woke from a nightmare and went down to the lake to watch the sunrise, Sirius would join her moments later, no matter how cold it was. Harry would wake up from the bond and more often than not see Sirius up and going down and stay in bed. If Sirius wasn't quite awake or he had a nightmare of his own, he went down and Hermione joined him. They were quiet mornings as they sat under warming spells and shook off the horrors or aching remembrance of loved ones still haunting them. Sirius would turn up as Padfoot and lay with his head in her lap, offering silent comfort until the sun rose up and then he'd shift back and they'd walk quietly together to the castle or he'd play in the snow and make her laugh or tackle her or jump in puddles once spring weather began to warm and turn everything into slush. She'd become Whiskers and play with him sometimes and they'd both go in for breakfast, pink cheeked and cold but laughing.

They became busy with schoolwork, preparing for NEWTs filled up every spare moment. Hermione had grown used to the tap tap tap of Sirius's quil or the gentle vibration of the couch as his leg jumped while he studied. The near silent passing of notes between her and Remus as they poured over ruins or arithmancy problems together. The meticulous and nit picking instructions and huffed exasperations over nitwit or halfwits writing various texts of Severus when they studied for potions. Harry rummaging through her notes since his weren't as good, copying them over again and again as a way to study. James practicing wand work while Lily quizzed him on theory in hushed tones. There was always someone to study with and every moment was an opportunity to practice or quiz each other until quickly, to quickly, days grew longer and plants bloomed, the weather warmed and the Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Tests were upon them. Fifth years took the OWLs first and they had two weeks completely free to study. Written exams came first in the morning and then practical, one subject daily until they were finished, for most it was four days almost all the rest five. Hermione and Remus were both sitting seven exams and Lily six. The friends all studied together often, joined at times by Frank and Alice though they generally studied with Adam and Penny. More often than not Hermione found herself alone with Remus as they studied longer and harder, due to their amount of exams or maybe their level of dedication and perfectionism.

Going into the exams they'd reach for each others hands and give a squeaze of support, reminding each other they would do amazing and wishing each other luck, just with the simple gesture alone. At the end of the day they'd collapse exhausted with the others for a few hours and then head back to study before falling asleep, usually over notes they had been reviewing until it was time to wake for the next.

When it was finally over Hermione collapsed on Harry's bed and moaned at his inquiry if she was ok making him laugh and nudge her over lying down, "It's over now. We've finished Hogwarts."

"I know." She sighed shifting to rest her head on his shoulder, "It's wonderful and amazing and should be everything I've worked seven years for."

"Instead we've spent almost eight working for something much more life threatening."

"I just wrote seven NEWTs don't tell me its not life threatening or I'll throttle you."

"Well it's certainly threatening to my life." Harry chuckled.

"It's just beginning now though." She sighed after a moment, "It's really going to start again."

"Yes." He agreed softly.

"We didn't make a difference at all here, didn't reach out to any Slytherins, haven't even really changed anything."

"We did Mya." Harry contradicted, "You know small changes can have huge consequences. We are making a difference just by being here but we've also changed everything for Severus and hopefully my parents, Sirius and Remus, I don't know about Peter, maybe he'll still follow that path but we won't let him hurt the people we love while he does it. We are making a difference My, I promise."

"I don't want to make a difference." She hissed, "I want to change it."

"We will." He agreed firmly, "We'll make it better."

Hermione sighed and nodded, "Just, not today." She yawned and closed her eyes.

"Not today." Harry agreed quietly, closing his eyes to nap as well.

Once the exams finished for all of them, students were given a day off before graduation, families all came and the school, quiet after the departure of all the other students, was busy and full again.

"You alright James?" Hermione smiled at his rumpled appearance in the common room as he returned from breakfast without Remus and Harry.

"Fine." He huffed, "Not like this part matters does it."

"Graduating?" She frowned at him.

"The whole stupid ceremony."

"It's to celebrate with our family and friends James, since when don't you like any excuse to celebrate?" Adam chuckled coming down from the boys dorm.

"With the family I don't have not cheering for me?" He hissed turning to go back up the stairs moodily.

Hermione followed after him and found Sirius lounging on the bed, "You aren't dressed yet."

"For what?"

"Graduation."

"My family isn't coming Kitten and if they did, all the more reason not to go."

"What's the point in being at some stuffy, stupid ceremony?" James agreed tossing his tie to his trunk where it hung half off the side.

"To celebrate with _us_." Hermione finally told them gently, "With Lily and with Remus whose been your best friend for seven years and worked so hard. With Harry and I, who don't have anyone but each other and you, either so if you aren't going to be there to cheer for us, I suppose we'll walk across a silent stage and accept this recognition of our accomplishments alone." Sirius groaned as she quietly left but got off the bed and flung James's tie at him.

"I could almost pretend at Christmas Sirius but I can't pretend today." James told him running a hand through his hair.

"Neither can I mate but she's right, we're a family and we should celebrate these moments because wherever we go after we're gone you know Mrs. P is watching us, grinning and sobbing and Mr. P is congratulating us and telling us how proud he is"

"I know." James agreed sulkily as he put his tie back on.

"Lily will want you there to."

"Lily." James smiled at her name, "I love her."

"I know but she'll kill you if you don't show up to give that speech with her."

"Yeah." He jumped up, "Can't disappoint Lily and mum would never forgive us for not walking across that stage after getting through seven years without expulsion or suspension or extensive hospitalization."

"Exactly." Sirius agreed. Quickly they got ready and though the pain of missing the Potter's was still there, they smiled and joked and grew excited about the party with their friends and classmates.

Remus stopped frowning at them as they came out of the dorm, "Mya said you two weren't coming?"

"Of course we're coming!" James jumped the last few steps, "I'd never let Evans down!" He called grinning at her as she rolled her eyes from the couch where she was reading over her speech but smiled back.

Sirius cuffed his friend on the shoulder before wrapping an arm around him, "Really Moony, me, sit still and alone in my room while you were having a party? Please."

James stepped up to give his speech with Lily, he looked around noting again the painful absence of his parents but his eyes found his friends, all smiling happily, looks encouraging and so supportive. With a deep breath he began and shot a quick look to Lily, the words stopped. He was mostly winging it, knowing roughly what to say but not having written it out. His mind went blank as he looked at his friends, his family, his eyes flicked to Lily.

"Sorry." He told the crowd, "I have more to say about our years here and Lily's going to talk about the future and how prepared we are and what an adventure it will be, which I agree with, it's a great speech. I've heard it, but I can't hear it again, can't really be excited about our future just yet. See, I lost my parents this past November. All of you graduating with us today know it was a loss for me and Sirius both and it was really hard but we had each other and our friends. They've been our family here at Hogwarts and I know that many of us graduating today will keep in touch in years to come, will stay friends, so of you, like Sirius and I, found family here. I'm so grateful to them, to all of you for having gone on this adventure with me here at Hogwarts, whether we were once enemies, friends or just passingly aquainted, I'm not sure there is a single Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff or even Slytherin who hasn't been aware of the crush I had on Lily, from our very first year. I thought she was amazing before I really understood the concept of girls. Then once I did, I knew she was the only one for me. Lily of course, being the kind and good, brilliant witch she is, wouldn't give me the time of day unless it was to tell me when I was being a jerk. I was a prankster and slightly obnoxious git to be honest and I didn't deserve her, though most of the pranks have been in good fun over the years, Lily made me see I had been a bit of a bully in my younger years and to all of you I'm sorry, none more than to her friend, Severus because she loved him and hated me so long. I'm sorry Snape." He met the wizards eyes and nodded before glancing at Lily and taking a deep breath and looking out at the crowd, "When my parents died, Lily was there for me, the same way my friends were, those friends are my family and I don't know how to face the future, to see this next great adventure and be excited by it without knowing Lily will be on it with me, without having her either hate or love me. She's made me a better man because I've always wanted to be a man who deserved her. I'll leave here tomorrow, with memories of seven years shared with all of you and with the only family I have left." He smiled at Remus, Harry, Hermione and Sirius, meeting Sirius's eyes before he turned to the blushing red head, "I don't want to leave here without knowing that family will include you. Lily Evans, I've loved you for seven years and though I never deserved you, I'll spend my life trying to be the man the does, I'll make mistakes and I'll probably still be an arrogant prig sometimes but I'll love you above anyone or anything for all of my life. Please be my wife."

Lily was crying as she stood staring at him, the entire great hall was silent for a long moment as she sniffled and nodded fligging herself into his arms. "Yes." She finally managed to get out.

"I love you." He whispered only for her.

"I love you." She answered back as he pulled back a little to wipe her tears. She laughed and kissed him, it was just a quick kiss but the whole hall cheered riotously. Even a few Slytherin's clapped as the seven year love story reached it's happy end.


	16. Chapter 16

After the rest of the ceremony finished, a late lunch or early supper feast appeared to be shared with their family and friends then the guests departed for the trip home with a five o'clock train. The seventh years had the option to leave with them but there was a graduation party that lasted all night for just the seventh years that almost all of them stayed for. Once goodbyes were said they all dispersed to dorms to change and relax before the party or in the case of the Marauders, to celebrate the engagement of their friends.

At the party itself, butterbeer was flowing, music played loudly and food came out at midnight for a second mini-feast. Everyone was laughing and dancing, having a great celebration.

"You alright Remus?" Mya asked grinning as she dropped into a seat next to him, at one of the tables that lined the walls of the Great hall, out of breath and over warm from dancing.

"Just watching them." He told her grinning at his friends.

"Are you worried? About the future." She asked, taking in the slightly more solemn attitude of her friend in comparison to the others.

"What future?" He asked with a lifted brow. "You might not want to hear it Luv, and Harry's warned me thoroughly that you don't, but I'm a monster." He held up his hands at her angry expression, "In the eyes of _most_ of the wizarding world, I am. My parents didn't even expect I'd be able to come to Hogwarts but I was really lucky, and when the boys found out what I am, I never expected them to stick by me, having them and you, Harry and Lily amazes me but I'm still what I am and there are laws and prejudices." He shrugged, "No matter how lucky I was to come here and how blessed I was to make the friends that I have, the reality is that there is no future waiting for me outside of Hogwarts."

"What are you on about?" James asked panting as he dropped into a chair as well and took up some pumpkin juice, handing a cup to Lily first, only having caught the outside of Hogwarts words as he sat.

"Tomorrow." Remus shrugged, "The future."

"What will you do?" Lily asked with a warm smile.

"Nothing." Remus shrugged.

"Men of the world." Sirius grinned clapping him on the back and dropping into a seat as he joined them.

"More like men of the wedding. You lot aren't roaming the world without me and just popping back in for the party." James rolled his eyes at them, "Where _are _we going to live." He asked with a frown, "I don't think I could handle being home without it being _home_ anymore." Lily took his hand in hers giving it a sympathetic squeeze.

"Have you counted us mate? Even if you weren't getting married, we'd never fit at home now that it's more than the three of us." Sirius laughed.

"True." James nodded with a bittersweet chuckle. "So we'll buy a place."

"We should get something close to muggle stuff." Sirius grinned, "Then I can get my motorbike, eh Moony."

"Obviously Pads, Lily's muggleborn, she'll want to be part of that world still." James shoved his shoulder, then he frowned at her, "You don't want to live on our own do you?"

"You will be married." Remus told him with a shake of his head.

"Yeah but we're all a family." Sirius frowned at his friend, "Of course we'll all still live together, won't we?"

"Lily?" James looked at her with pleading eyes.

"We can all get a place together." Lily smiled at him, "At least to start out, then I'm sure we'll all stay close."

"So we buy a house." James grinned.

Remus shook his head, "I wont be able to afford it."

James snorted and rolled his eyes, "You need to visit the vaults mate. Your children's children will be able to afford it."

"Yeah Moony, even without the vaults Mr and Mrs P left us, I have one from some uncle before I was disowned and James had one from his grandparents that would have done us until we were Dumbledore old if not longer. Now we're like… Malfoy rich."

"Not quite." James rolled his eyes, "We never spend the ostentatiously the way they can though so it'll likely last us a generation or two longer than it will them."

"You think Pete will live with us?" Sirius asked frowning around the room as he looked for his friend, "Where is Wormtail? I barely saw him today, all week actually."

"He left before we finished writing exams." Remus rolled his eyes at his friend.

"He did?" James questioned, looking around as though Remus might be joking.

"He came back for the ceremony with his mom and left during the feast." Remus shook his head at his less than observant friends.

"Huh." James shrugged, unconcerned. "I don't think he ever planned to live with us anyways, his mum has him in line to work at the family business straight away."

"What's the family business?" Harry questioned with a frown.

"They have a shop selling meat pies in Piddlehinton, down Dorset area." Sirius flicked a Bertie Botts bean in his mouth from a bowl on the table. "We'll go down and have a bite and a visit for his birthday next month. We always do."

"You figure on working at all Padfoot?" James asked with a frown, "Can't believe I don't know the answer to that." He shook his head with a chuckle, "Talking about the future and planning past our next prank was never our thing eh?"

"Nah," Sirius shook his head, "It'll be a series of adventures and exploring the world for me. I'll come home where you and Lily will be all domestic with kids and then be off again. Moony will be studious and talking me out of at least half of everything I think of to do but coming with me to do half the time too. Maybe I'll even have the Kitten in tow, what do you think Whiskers, will you take turns with Moony keeping me out of trouble or are you going to have a real job?"

Hermione rolled her eyes and laughed, "Eventually I will but not right away, have a job I mean, not keep you out of trouble."

"You could always get into trouble with me." He smirked at her.

"Mya and I are going to take some time, relax, sort out what we want, maybe do a bit of travelling." Harry spoke up, "before we really decide what comes next."

"You'll have home base with us though right?" Lily confirmed before turning pleading eyes on Hermione, "You can't leave me alone with all three of them."

Hermione laughed shaking her head but agreed, "Of course we will."

"Like Sirius said," Harry shrugged, "We're family."

"Let's dance more." Sirius jumped up holding his hand out to Hermione, "Coming Kitten?"

"Yeah." She grinned getting up and taking his hand.

Harry shook his head and laughed as he watched Sirius twirl her.

"Evans?" James grinned at her.

"Engaged and he still uses my surname." She pretended to huff at Remus.

"Come on Lils, my Lily-Flower, my love, my beautiful wondrous possibly mad for agreeing to it fiancé, dance with me." James gave an exaggerated bow before tugging the giggling girl to her feet.

Harry slid down next to Remus, "You ok?"

Remus just shook his head and stared after his friends, "My family had little money, my father faced discrimination at work never getting a promotion and with having to move us so often we had no savings, were barely able to keep out of debt. Even my mother's life insurance barely covered her funeral expenses. I have no money and won't be able to make any. They know all of that, I know they know it but…"

Harry stopped him with a hand on his arm, "But to them it doesn't matter where you came from or what you come with or that once a month you get a bit hairy and cranky because you're their brother, _our_ brother and together we have money and family and love and that is all any of us will ever need in life. Hell, with mine and Mya's gold we might actually be as wealthy as the Malfoy's after all."

"I can't just live off of you or them."

"Remus, we're family, we take care of each other and until the world changes and people become less stupid, you will face discrimination but no one who loves you will let you suffer because of it. Not as far as we can help anyways." Harry shrugged, "Besides, you know none of them will let you not accept their love and support." He chuckled and shook his head, "I dare you to try just so I can see how Sirius reacts. Or Mya for that matter and did I tell you how scary she can be?" Remus swallowed and nodded, fighting back the waves of emotion, "Come on." Harry grinned nudging his shoulder, "This is a celebration and it's the one time I won't hex any of you lot for groping my sister." He teased.

Remus shook his head and laughed but got up to join their friends on the dance floor. Lily left James to dance with him and then traded Mya for Harry, each girl dancing with the four boys, as they spun and twirled and traded them around until all six were laughing and over heated again. Alice and Frank joined in their odd circle dance and they played around enjoying their last night as Hogwarts students.

Walking outside in the predawn light to get some air, Hermione went down to the lake and sat cross-legged looking out over the water, she'd miss this view and the calm she got sitting there every morning.

She laughed when a large black for jogged over and rested his head rested on her leg, "Hey Padfoot." She told him. He just rumbled in enjoyment as she rubbed his ear. "I'll miss this." He whined in agreement and she stroked his head in silence, watching the sun come up. Harry and then the others joined them as the sun made its first sliver of appearance in the distance and Sirius transformed back.

"I didn't see that." Lily groaned shaking her head.

"See what?" Sirius winked at her making her chuckle and roll her eyes at him.

They all sat, exhausted, watching the sun come up, the dawn of a new day and of their new lives.


	17. Chapter 17

Breakfast was served when they went inside, all of the students were tired and a bit solemn as they ate and packed up their things, gone was the excited bustle of packing up and saying goodbye to friends they wouldn't see again until September. It was more than just the all nighter that left the castle oddly quiet, as everyone got ready to meet the train. All the celebration and excitement was gone and instead was a bittersweet goodbye to a place that had been home for seven years, to the life they'd known until then.

The train, empty of other students was equally quiet with multiple empty compartments, the six friends all crammed into one though as they talked about house hunting and what to do when they arrived in London.

Lily was bringing James home with her, Remus was going home to see his father but Sirius, Harry and Hermione had no where and no one. It was agreed that they would stay in Diagon Alley and start the house hunt, the others would come in a week and they'd make the purchase.

At the station they all hugged goodbye and the trio left behind got two rooms at the Leaky Cauldron.

"We could just share one." Sirius teased Mya with a smirk.

"Don't make me hex you." Harry laughed shoving his friend.

"Sirius snorted unable to hold back a grin, "As if you could best me."

"Easily." They proceeded to shove at each other playfully while Hermione ignored them and flicked through a real estate magazine she'd got at the train station.

"One of you go get a wizarding estates booklet." Hermione ordered, flicking her wand to repair a damaged glass they'd knocked over.

"I'll go." Harry told her, shoving Sirius one last time who sent a wordless tripping hex at him as he left in retaliation.

After a few minutes of his restless movements around the room, Hermione rolled her eyes "Sketch." she tossed his sketchbook at him from the nightstand with the flick of her wand, in annoyance. Sirius chuckled and waved his wand for his pens. "How on earth are you going to survive without anything to do everyday?" Hermione asked him with a lifted brow as she set the magazine aside.

"Sketching." He told her with a smirk as he held up the pad making her laugh. He shrugged, "I'll do something, I just don't know what. I could become an Auror as long as I passed my NEWTs but as much fun as defeating my family and their friends would be," he shrugged, "I don't think it would be for me." He smirked and winked, "To much paperwork." Hermione laughed and shook her head, as he continued, "The ministry is corrupt anyways and boring, again paperwork." He shook his head, "Curse Breaker would be cool but for the equations and banking part which is why I didn't take Arithmancy which negates that career as a possibility. I don't have the patience or attention span to make brooms or wands; I don't care enough about it even if I were good enough to become a Quidditch star and lets face it I'm not international star good. Muggle relations would be cool, I've always been fascinated in muggle things, well you know since I met Remus and actually learned about muggle things. Like have you heard about football? It's almost as fun as Quidditch to watch. Plus it would supremely piss off my family who mostly like to pretend Andromeda and I don't exist. Oh, that's my favorite cousin, even though she was a Slytherin she's cool. She married a muggle born named Ted and I haven't seen her since then, that was the same year I started Hogwarts. That would be even more paperwork than being an auror though and we return to the only negative aspect of my person, my attention span and ability to sit still."

"You don't give yourself enough credit, you just need to find something that can capture you the way sketching does." Hermione offered, "Give it a little time. Boredom will drive you to find something productive."

"Or destructive." He chuckled.

"Possibly." She agreed with a laugh. "You haven't contacted her? Your cousin I mean? Family seems so important you, it surprised me."

"My parents wouldn't tell me how when it first happened and we weren't especially close, she's so much older but of my cousins she was the best." He shrugged. "She has her own life. What about you, smart girl like you could rule the wizarding world if you set your mind to it."

"Harry and I considered Auror training but we want to take a year first."

"Yeah." Sirius nodded "a year is a good idea."

She turned her attention back to the housing adds and he began to sketch, Harry came back and began playing with a snitch, eventually the two boys went out to race brooms leaving Hermione in peace. When they came back she showed them the ones she'd circled and they debated which to see. The next day, they met a witch agent and had a look, narrowing the choices down.

While looking at places Harry and Hermione were able to carefully retrieve the ring without Sirius knowing. They already had the diadem, retrieved from the ROR the day of graduation but the cup was gone from Hogwarts, the Locket wouldn't be put in its hiding place for two years, Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange wouldn't be in possession of the diary or the cup until close to then as well. Nagini wasn't yet created and Harry had already died. Later the same day, they hid the ring in the vault with the diadem. Voldemort had been to split for to long to feel their destruction in the nineties but it was the seventies, they had to make sure he couldn't make more before altering him that they knew about the five he had. They also knew from experience with the locket, they didn't want the horcruxes near them so they were carefully locked away, waiting for destruction. As they left the vault, Hermione smirked at the one next to it, Bellatrix Lestrange's, they'd gotten the cup from it once, they'd do it again, as soon as they were sure it was there.

They'd have to be careful about their timing, they didn't want Voldemort to know what they were up to, defeating him once and for all would take time and careful planning. That meant waiting until the horcruxes were in locations they knew they'd be, which gave them two years to wait, fighting against him in other ways, saving who they could by working with the order and trying to influence events they knew about that had major effects on the future. The prophesy, meant finding a way to keep their old divination teacher from her interview with Dumbledore, no one could overhear that prophesy, Severus wouldn't be the one to give it to Voldemort but someone else might and they didn't want Dumbledore to have it either. Then there were certain battles they might not be able to prevent but could be better prepared for to save the lives of many, including the Prewett twins, Molly's brothers. So many little things to help as they continued to plot and wait the right time, all of it had to be carefully managed and done in secret. Getting the ring with Sirius was a risk but a small one, the wizard wasn't paying much attention as they visited the old Gaunt shack while looking at homes to buy. Hermione was easily able to distract him and the witch showing them places by walking around the garden and commenting that the listing made the place seem larger and she really didn't think it would work. Harry quickly located the ring under a floorboard and levitated it into a small magically protected box before joining them outside and shaking his head telling them there was just no way the small run down home would work. They'd spent no more than five minutes at the property and neither Sirius nor the witch with them had noticed anything out of ordinary in the visit.

Sirius still had to sign the last document transferring the Potter vault left to him into his name and getting the key. While Harry told him that he and Hermione needed to visit theirs as well, giving him a chance to put the ring in the one they kept specially for their mission, while Hermione went to their main vault to get some galleons.

Meeting Sirius in front of the bank a few minutes later Hermione took his hand, "Sirius?"

"I knew they left me a vault but..." Sirius swallowed and shook his head forcing a smile to her, "I didn't go in after the funeral, I knew they'd left me a vault, the will said I was their son to and they wanted to make sure I was always cared for. I thought it would just be gold."

"What's inside?"

"Potter heirlooms." He told her quietly as Harry joined them having come from his and Hermione's main vault.

Hermione squeezed his hand and sent him a smile, "How about some lunch before the next house?"

"Yeah," Sirius nodded, "that last shack we looked at was a dump, what were you two thinking? Even if it were a nice shack it would be WAY to small."

Hermione bit her lip and nodded but Harry shrugged, "In the picture I thought it was the big place down the road. Sorry. Guess I wasn't paying attention."

"Clearly." Hermione nodded biting back a smile.

It was the last house and they crossed it off the list as well, to ostentatious, Sirius decided. It was empty and he was afraid to get the floors dirty or break something. The trio had finally narrowed down the choices for the others to five.

Remus arrived the next day and immediately knocked another of the five off their list, apparently it was in the same town he'd lived in the year before Hogwart's and they'd been especially unwelcoming to the family once suspicion arose about his _condition_.

James and Lily arrived the next day looking tired from her sisters wedding the day before but excited to look at the houses.

One was turned down almost immediately though they all liked the pretty country house, because it wouldn't be available for a month and none of them wanted to wait. The second was a town house in London and the third a small estate outside of Selsey both available to move in immediately. The estate was right on the water, which they all loved and had plenty of space to fly but it was very rural. The townhouse was right in London but being on a muggle street limited the things they did outside. Eventually it was decided by Lily that the space wasn't quite large enough for the six of them and James pointed out, Sirius wouldn't do well cooped up in a townhouse, a fact Sirius whole-heartedly agreed with. Remus was worried the estate was to much but his friends had ignored him on that but then agreed the place itself was a bit imposing and cold. This left them with Hermione's favorite of all the ones they'd seen, it was a huge Manor house. Instead of cold stone and overly manicured lawns it had long grass and wildflowers with huge old tress all over the property and vines grew up the walls of house. There were lots of windows and large fireplaces, the whole place was light, open and airy but warm and welcoming. The group signed the papers and moved in that night, conjuring cots, cushions and blankets to sleep from Hogwarts trunks and old clothes.


	18. Chapter 18

They went together to shop for furniture and spent more time goofing off and laughing than actually picking things.

Hermione laughed as Harry sprawled on a couch, the fifth they'd tried this 'comfort test' on and deemed it perfect. Sirius piled on top of him and elbowed him a bit, playfully beating on him before declaring it a bit lumpy. Harry tossed the boy off him and tackled him while James jumped on the couch to sprawl out.

"Not bad!" He laughed, lifting his arms behind his head only to be yanked off by Sirius and Harry each grabbing a foot and yanking him to the floor.

Remus came up beside her with a grin, "You know you signed on to live with that."

"So did you." She reminded him with a laugh.

He shrugged, "After seven years it would be to quiet without them, summer always was and I saw one or the other if not both for at least half of it."

Hermione turned to face him with a smile, "Life will never be boring at any rate."

"No." He agreed with a chuckle, "Unless we hex them, will you hate me if I hex Harry?"

"Nah." She laughed, "I do it all the time."

Remus grinned at her and leaned in, "I can't decide if they should be more afraid of you or Lily." He nodded to the red head who was marching up to the three boys. Hermione bit back a grin.

"There's the exact same couch right there!"

"It's not the _exact_ same." Sirius protested.

"That one's green." Harry nodded with a grin.

"Yeah Lil, we can't have a Slytherin couch!" James gasped in mock outrage.

"So change it." She rolled her eyes at them.

"It will still be Slytherin at heart." Sirius exclaimed dramatically.

"Sit!" Lily ordered pointing from him to the couch.

"Lily." Sirius protested but at her look he sat.

"See, it hasn't killed you." She rolled her eyes, "It's a sofa."

"It's not comfortable." He grumbled.

"Quiet." She told him waving over a sales person. "We'll take that chocolate sofa but we'll need two and those over large round red arm chairs."

"Oh, where?" James jumped up and looked around.

"There." Lily pointed at them as he and Harry hurried over.

"Can I go look to?" Sirius asked with puppy dog eyes.

Lily tried to look fierce but gave up with a giggle and nodded, he bounced up and ran after his friends, jumping on James sitting in one.

"Don't break them!" She shouted turning to the muggle sales person. "Sorry."

The girl just grinned and shook her head, "Are they single?"

Lily laughed, "Harry and Sirius are, James is my fiancé." The word was said with a giant grin she couldn't suppress whenever she thought about it, "Remus is around here somewhere with Mya and he's single to." Lily explained examining a pillow "Is this green or blue?"

"Sort of green blue I guess." The girl answered.

Lily sighed and put it down then explained, "They hate green. It's a school rivalry thing and they don't seem to have caught on to the fact we've graduated."

This made the girl grin and nod, "I understand completely, my mum can't buy anything that shares the colors of my dad's favorite football team rivals."

Remus caught Hermione's attention again as he tugged her elbow and led her over to some tables and dining chairs.

"Green?" He asked with a wink running a hand over one chair and making her laugh.

"To pale, it's got to be real emerald green."

Remus laughed and moved to another table, "That won't fit us unless you expect lily and I to eat in the kitchen and for none of you to ever have a girl friend over."

"Unless she were already in the house." He whispered.

"Sorry?"

"Nothing." He sent her a smile, "We could always extend it."

"Stop trying to save us money." She shook her head at him, "It's to flimsy anyways, the boys would break it before we ever sat down." She moved to a sturdier looking set.

"To blocky." He told her when a head shake. "The chairs look like boxes."

They moved together to another one but saw a snake design in the wood and laughed, immediately moving on.

She liked the next one he picked out and they marked it for Lily and the guys to look at along with another that was a bit formal but was big and seemed fairly sturdy before moving on to library furniture. He found a beautiful chess table and sat but when he looked at her with a smile and saw her expression he immediately jumped up and pulled her into his arms, "Mya, I'm sorry I didn't think."

"Think?" She asked pulling back.

"The cuff you gave Harry, the way you both looked, we all knew, I mean we figured it was special, the chess piece." He explained.

She forced a smile and nodded, "It represents something special, someone special. The memory is hard but happy, you shouldn't have to tiptoe around our past or not play chess Remus. It's a beautiful table."

He nodded and pulled her close again, after a moment he pulled back and they smiled at each other. Remus leaned down and brushed his lips against hers gently.

Hermione leaned into the kiss, surprising though the move had been, it also felt comfortable, right.

Sirius bounded away from his friends but came to a halt when he stepped around the corner to another section and saw Remus kissing Hermione. He stared in surprise but when they pulled apart he quickly backed away out of sight.

"What's up mate?" James asked slapping his back.

"Nothing." Sirius shook his head and forced a grin, only making James frown, "Nothing." Sirius said again. "Let's get something ridiculously muggle that we'll never use."

"Why?"

Sirius shrugged, "Because we can."

This made James laugh and nod, Sirius led the way, James kept an eye on the section Sirius had backed out of and a few minutes later Remus and Hermione emerged, both flushed and laughing. Understanding flooded James, along with both happiness for Remus and regret for Sirius. "I'm sorry mate." He whispered.

Sirius shook his head, "Don't tell him.

"He knows you like her." James told him with a frown.

"Yeah." Sirius replied looking away, it only took a moment for him to get himself under control and turned back with a forced smile, "It's good, great. I'm starving, think Lily will let us get ice creams and go to another muggle store?" James nodded forcing a smile of his own as he followed Sirius back to Lily.

As they left the store Remus felt a small hand slip into his and couldn't help but grin down out her petite frame, "Lily told Sirius we could go to a patio furniture store next, what do you want to bet he'll break something there?"

Hermione laughed and nodded, "Five quid says its James."

"You're on." Remus nodded squeezing her hand.

Inside the store the two pure blood wizards seemed even more amused than in the furniture store, James was playing with lawn ornaments while Sirius was challenging him to a dual with a pool noodle. Harry was laughing at them from a hammock and Lily tipped him, making all of them laugh until they nearly peed, his expression at it being her was so priceless that every time they thought about it the giggles started again.

Remus and Hermione lost the bet simultaneously when James and Sirius clapped two garden decorations together, shattering both and making Lily roll her eyes and tell them no ice cream if they broke anything else. Harry dropped a wind chime twenty seconds later, "It's not broken!" He shouted lifting it and shaking it out with a sheepish grin for Lily.

Lily shook her head trying not to laugh but when the arm of a fairy statue came off in Remus's hand and he tried to shove it back into place before surreptitiously sticking it in a pot, it was just to much and the red head and Hermione both burst into giggles.

At his sheepish shrug Hermione just grinned, chuckling and took his arm dragging him away from the clay objects.

They went for ice cream and went to a few more shops to get bedroom furniture, the boys all tested every mattress first lying on them, then bouncing around on them. Hermione almost fell over laughing when Harry flew off a springy mattress James jumped on to test with him. Remus jumped on Sirius in a twin bed prompting a pile of all four of them while Sirius thrashed and grunted, "This ones to small!"

"Cozy!" James disagreed pulling him back as the dark haired man nearly escaped.

"This one has straps and rails?" Harry mused looking at another hospital style bed.

"Perfect, Sirius wont fall out!" Remus called back.

"One time I fell out of bed but you were hogging it!"

"I was in the bottom bunk." Remus chuckled.

"It was the bigger part." Sirius insisted. "You know I need space when I sleep."

"Here!" James called leaping into the middle of an extended King.

"Bunkbeds!" Harry called climbing onto the ladder of one, "Top bunk ok for you Padfoot?"

"Bite me." He playfully growled examining a race car bed, "I want this one!"

"It's tiny." James protested getting in and kicking his feet hanging off the end.

Eventually they were able to pick furniture for their individual rooms, queen sized beds, dressers and night tables with mattresses and leave the store. After Sirius and James spent an hour playing with lamps in the store next to it, which they wouldn't have use for as electricity didn't work around to much magic, they picked out a random lamp 'just to have something ridiculously muggle' and declared the days tasks accomplished.

Finally they picked up takeout Chinese for dinner and left muggle London and went home. The next day they went to the wizarding shops but less amused by the novelty, the boys became bored quickly and shrugged at anything until Lily held up Emerald green curtains, in complete disgust the boys insisted they'd help if nothing green but a plant entered the house and took half the list of remaining items and went off to buy them.

With the help of magic the house was painted the next day and the day after that all the furniture arrived. They were finally able to sleep in beds instead of cots conjured from Hogwarts trunks. So by the end of the week they were completely settled in.


	19. Chapter 19

Lily and Hermione went back into muggle London for wedding magazines and Remus took Hermione on their first date, to a movie.

"You know movies?" Hermione asked him as he led her to the line of the cinema.

"My mom was a muggle." Her reminded her with a lifted brow.

"Right." She blushed, of course he knew about the cinema.

"We never went much," He told her, "We couldn't live in big towns and dad wasn't big on muggle electronics, even the microwave, he didn't trust them. We lived more around muggles, in a muggle home in a muggle neighborhood if we weren't out somewhere really rural, because it was easier with me, but he kept us a bit segregated. Mum took me at least once every summer though no matter where we were living. Dad always breathed this sigh of relief like he was afraid the movie screen would eat us or something, he absolutely refused to go after the first time she took him."

They got popcorn and sodas and settled into seats. It was fun and relaxing, easier than she expected, being with him was always easy but she worried how the pressure of a date would change things between them. He kissed her again, this time pulling her against his body and running his tongue over her lower lip, she opened for him and tentatively he deepened the kiss. It was soft and sweet and though he held her his arms were lose around her, more of a warmth resting on her back. He pulled back after only a moment and looked at her before smiling and lightly kissing her again before stepping away.

The next day Sirius got his motorbike and a week later James and he had made it fly. As Hermione and Remus got closer, so did Sirius and Harry, they went out to pubs at night or spent the weekend in London with Frank at his flat. He and Alice had broken up so he was always happy to have them and go out on the town. Lily went home to see her parents once a month but mostly it was Alice and Hermione to help her plan her wedding.

The time went by quickly and almost five months after moving in, after becoming a couple, Hermione slept with Remus. It was sweet and gentle and he seemed to be very careful. "Remus?" She asked lying in his arms after.

"Mya?" He asked back with a yawn.

"I wont break."

"Break?"

"You seem… afraid, sometimes, when you touch me."

"I am." He admitted, licking his lips he ran his fingers through her long hair, "I don't know everything that happened to you before Hogwarts Mya, and you don't have to tell me. I just never want to hurt you."

"Remus?"

"The way you reacted to Sirius, a year last September, when he grabbed you." He whispered.

Hermione nodded against his chest and fought the wave of tears and shivered at the remembered revulsion, "I'll never be afraid you Remy. I wasn't afraid of him, just surprised, I wasn't, I'm still not good at being taken off guard."

"You never have to be afraid Mya, I'll take care of you, we all will."

Harry and Ron would have died to protect her to, they would have killed to protect her that day and Harry hadn't even used the killing curse against Voldemort. She had no doubt in her mind he wouldn't have hesitated against Greyback. He was never given that chance, Draco had taken it instead, he had protected her, killed for her and they'd never cared for each other at all. Sometimes, you couldn't protect the people you loved and sometimes she wondered who it had broken more, her for having lived it or them for having been forced to watch something even someone they'd long considered a foe would kill to avenge. All she could say to remus laying there though was, "I love you Remy." She couldn't tell him she didn't believe him, because she did, she just knew, no one could protect someone from everything, no matter how much love there was between them.

"I love you too." He kissed her forehead, "So very much."

They heard a giggle and Hermione rolled her eyes, nightmares from the past chased from her mind again, "You know, with how he ignored every girl in Hogwarts I wouldn't have expected his door to be so revolving out of it." She didn't understand the bitterness in her own voice as she said the words but Remus didn't seem to pick up on it at all. Sirius was becoming someone neither of them knew and no one in the house seemed to know what to do or say about the seemingly abrupt shift in his personality.

"Lily's ready to hex him." Remus snorted, "You know the last slag was such a slapper I think her whole dress was a shirt bought two sizes to small." He shook his head and sighed, "I don't know why he's become such a playboy, it's not your brother's influence." He snorted, "He's not a Casanova, at least not that I've seen."

Hermione bit back a laugh, "Harry? Not a chance."

"He needs a girl." Remus mused.

"He's dating Alice."

"What?" Remus bolted up displacing her.

Hermione laughed at his shock, "Really, you can't tell?"

"He never said anything!"

"He's friends with Frank, so are you." She shrugged, "They've been keeping it quiet."

"How long?"

"I noticed it three and a half months ago." She shrugged. "I don't think is was anything more than a one night mistake because they were awkward around each other a week or so, then I was pretty sure they were a thing, hmm, little over two months ago now."

Remus shook his head and laid back down pulling her against his chest. "Do the others know?"

"Lily's pretty observant." Hermione shrugged.

Remus rolled his eyes though she couldn't see. Hermione yawned and he kissed her gently, "Sleep luv."

Harry and Alice hid their relationship for another month before Frank found out and punched him. Frank had broken up with Alice in Auror training and been flirting, even picked up a girl or two with Sirius but he was still in love with the girl. Harry forgave him, shrugging it off and saying he sort of deserved it anyways, it didn't make him break up with Alice though it ended the weekends in London, for a couple weeks at least. It didn't stop Sirius from going out, getting drunk and bringing home girls weekly though and depending on how much firewhiskey he had, often forgetting silencing charms.

Over those first few months after graduating, Hermione met with Severus at least twice a week if not more, once for lunch every Tuesday and at least one other day to brew together, usually on the weekends. Lily would join them to help out or share tea or lunch more often than not on those days. Hermione had never been to his home but he'd been to theirs often enough and they'd even turned a room into the basement into a potions room, ostensibly for her and Lily but neither girl really used for much except on the days Severus came and this both girls viewed it as his lab.

When he didn't show up for their Tuesday lunch, one day, several months into their weekly ritual, she went looking for him. It wasn't like him not to send her any word if he was going to be late let alone cancel, though he had been cancelling more and more lately and she hadn't seen him in three weeks which to her was three weeks to long. Lily told her to send him a note and to remind him that she wouldn't accept another excuse for him not to drop by that weekend to see them both but Hermione was concerned.

Disregarding the notion to send an owl she went out in search of the to long absent wizard. When she arrived at the address of his home she had to triple check she was in the correct place but no matter how many times she checked, it was correct. Trying to remember she was a witch and outside appearances could be incredibly deceiving in the wizarding world she approached the house but couldn't help but be appalled at the sight of Spinners End.

As she banged on the dilapidated door she reminded herself again, that they were magical beings and inside was probably much nicer. When he yanked open the door with an angry scowl that relaxed, minutely, when he saw who it was, and let her in she was even more appalled. The interior was even more dilapidated that the exterior which looked like an abandoned asylum out of a horror movie without the graffiti.

He led her to the kitchen, which was tidy and somewhat together and apologized for missing lunch as he'd overslept. The boy looked exhausted and as though he'd lost more weight, at least half a stone. He couldn't afford to lose even a fraction of a stone before, now he was scarily thin and she'd seen him, only a few weeks before.

Tea made, he led her to a small but tidy and well cared for library stacked wall to wall and floor to ceiling with more books than the shelves could hold. The rest of the house she'd seen looked like it would fall apart or should be condemned.

"Severus Snape," she glared at him as he handed over her tea, setting it on the small table beside a chair she stood near, "You tell me what's going on this instant and don't tell me you're just tired, you've been exhausted since we left Hogwarts and I don't want to hear how much work becoming a potions master is either." She demanded hands on hips, ignoring the tea and chair, "And what happened to your house?"

"Nothing happened to my house." He snapped. "It's in disrepair because father neglected it, the place belonged to my mothers family so he didn't care about it. After they both died I spent most of my time away at Hogwarts and hadn't the money or time to fix anything. I still I have no money to fix much more than the most essential rooms though this little library was pushing it and I really should have only repaired the kitchen and small bathroom, my room is perfectly serviceable still, if a tad drafty. Regardless, the house is just fine and will stand until it can be properly rebuilt."

"Do you have money to eat?" She demanded glaring at him.

"Enough." He shifted his feet and then angrily snapped, "Drink your tea."

Hermione crossed her arms, "Talk, now, or I'll get Lily and we'll make you."

He rolled his eyes and huffed, "There's nothing to say, I missed our lunch because I over slept, my house needs a few repairs, potions mastery _is_ difficult and keeps me very busy. I've been busy, to busy to spend wasted hours sitting about gossiping with a bored witch wasting away her prestigious mind such as yourself or helping to brew perfectly simple potions she might do on her own, at this point you should even be able to brew the wolfsbane on your own or at worst with minimal help from Lily."

"Sev." She pleaded gently, recognizing that his pride wouldn't let him open up to her when she demanded it like a brash lion charging in.

He sighed and sank into a battered chair, "I've been working nights in a muggle cemetery as a night watchman but I can barely afford the ingredients for my mastery and anything I had went to the master to teach me. Money is tight and sleep is a luxury I must limit but if I'm very careful and eat one egg for breakfast with a slice of toast and beans with toast at supper plus our lunches once a week or almost once a week, as long as I cancel one or two and I don't need a new cauldron or other equipment I can afford to finish this summer of study before taking on a third position and further limiting the time I spend lazing about in bed. I'm advanced enough that even tired I can complete the work."

"Sev." She bit back tears and moved to him dropping to squish on the chair with him and hug him. "Why didn't you ever say it was so bad? I hate the idea of you suffering or struggling at all."

After a few moments he hugged her back before pulling away, "I'm fine, now stop that." She got up shaking out her hair; chin jutting up in that stubborn Gryffindor way she and Lily both had. "Mya?" He growled, knowing he wouldn't like what was coming and afraid he'd have no say in whatever it was no matter how it affected his own life.

He was right. A few hours later they stood in the living area of the manor she and Lily shared with the marauders, he'd been there to brew almost every weekend and mostly he and the other men had been able to avoid each other. Now they were all gathered and glaring at him, except Harry who always seemed a bit amused by Severus's friendship with his twin.

"It's my house too and I'm opening it to him." Hermione was telling them arms crossed, "If you don't like it I can move out and Sev and I will find our own place."

"The three of us can." Lily, equally as stubborn, if not more so, crossed her arms in angry solidarity.

"Come on Lily!" James huffed.

"No way." Sirius growled.

"I put up with every bimbo you bring to our house on the weekend." She spat at him.

"I put up with him being here on the weekend." He shot back, "Not one complaint, I even helped set up the bloody lab downstairs!" Sirius protested, "If I have seen him I've been more than civil but downright nice to him!"

"He's moving in or we're moving out." Lily repeated.

"Lily-bug…"

"Don't you Lily anything me James Potter" She spat, "He's my friend and this is our home and he's as welcome in it as your friends."

"To visit!" Sirius growled.

"Remus? Harry?" Lily turned on them.

Harry shrugged and grinned, "What's one more in the mad house? He already has a lab downstairs and there is a bathroom and bedroom, hell he could convert the basement into his own apartment with little work. I say move him in."

Remus was unable to hold back the laugh entirely as James and Sirius spun on the boy.

"I knew he was your evil doppelganger." Sirius grumbled.

"How could you mate?" James shook his head looking appalled.

Harry shrugged, "He makes Mya happy. She's my priority, if you don't know that by now, you all have serious problems."

"He'll have a Sirius problem living here." Remus chuckled, "A James one too."

"I'm not…" Severus tried but was immediately cut off.

"Shush Sev, you're moving in and I wont hear anything more, from any of you." Lily told them all sternly. "Anyone who doesn't like it can live elsewhere."

"I'd be happy to." Severus muttered.

Hermione shot him a glare, "Let's get you and your things settled in your room and then we're having lunch and you'll call that dreadful cemetery and quit. You need rest, proper meals, a decent lab and a good home."

"I need…" He shut his mouth at the glare both women sent him and motioned Hermione to lead the way.

Lily turned back to the other men, "I expect all three of you to be kind. Harry clearly won't be an issue and I'd expect more from you Remus since you've never been a bully but let me be clear James Potter, if you are cruel to my friend, if you make him feel unwelcome or bad in any way, this wedding won't be happening, Hermione and I will move out with him and you can all spend you lives alone as miserable, childish bullies or with slags and slappers populating your bedroom until you are the first wizards to contract venereal disease like Sirius seems to be attempting." With that she spun around and went into the kitchen where they could hear things banging around as she made lunch.

"So I've slept with one or two women on the cheaper slide of the scale, I'm not some degenerate man-whore." Sirius spat.

All three men turned to him with skeptical looks and he growled getting up and storming away.

"Padfoot!" James called jumping up and stopping him.

"What?" He hissed spinning.

"We know you aren't like that." Harry offered, "You just…"

"What!" Sirius demanded.

"Drink a lot." James sighed running a hand through his hair, "It's not really like you."

"It's not even the drinking, Harry contradicted, the older Sirius had drunk heavily as well, "we have a great time on the town it's just…"

"This isn't the right way to deal with it Sirius." James told him gently, "I let it go, we all have but Lily's right, it's getting out of hand.

"You used to think it mattered." Remus supplied "You wanted to be with the right girl."

"I found the right girl." Sirius snapped at him, "I found _the_ girl, _my_ girl and she chose you!" He spun out of the room and they heard the door slam.

Remus looked dumbfounded from James to Harry and back, "I know he liked her but… I'd never… he never… James?"

"Give him time Moony." James sighed, "He's dealing with it and you know he'd never let anything come between us, we're a family, a real family and he'd die for us." James patted his knee and got up to go into the kitchen. He might not be able to do anything for Sirius right now but he could head off any issues with Lily, or at least try to be mature and discuss things like the grown up he was supposed the be.

"Lil?"

"What?" She demanded turning to him with a glare.

James ran a hand through his already messy hair, "It was a surprise is all, it would have been, I don't know, polite of you and Mya to talk to us about it instead of turning up with him and his trunk and telling us he was moving in." He held up his hand to stop her from responding, "It's your house and hers and you can have who you want to stay but it's our home too and we need to respect each other, it was just dealt with in the wrong way is all I mean."

Lily shut her mouth, still frowning but nodded and grudgingly agreed, "I'm sorry."

"Me too and of course I'll be nice to him, we all will. Sirius… that wasn't even really about Severus."

"What's going on with him James?"

"He's in love with Mya." James told her gently.

The concern, sorrow and love washed over her face as she opened her mouth and sighed, closing it she shook her head "I'm sorry. I know he liked her at Hogwarts we all did but if it wasn't Remy it would have been someone though, he understands that doesn't he?"

"Yeah." James nodded, "It's just, complicated. I'm sorry Lil, he just," James shook his head and smiled sadly at her, "Don't say anything to her ok? To anyone."

"Does he know? Remy I mean."

James nodded, "Yeah, he does now. It'll be fine though. Them and Severus."

She licked her lips again, "Ok." He turned but she stopped him with a gentle, "James?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry. For how we handled this." James shook his head and smiled at her gently, "I love you."

"Love you too Lils."


	20. Chapter 20

Severus became Lily and Hermione's project, they'd make him eat three times a day and sit for hours talking potions with him. If his girl didn't come to bed with him each night both James and Remus thought he might be jealous of the wizard. As it was the only one Hermione spent as much time with as she did Severus was Harry. The two were still closer than any two people any of them knew and would make it a point of spending time together just the two of them, they'd call it twin dates and sometimes disappear for days at a time. Hermione would wake from nightmares sometimes and if he woke as she was slipping out of bed she'd let him comfort her before leaving and then tell him to sleep before getting up and slipping into her twins room or if Alice was there the twins would be found, hours later, in the library, peacefully asleep close to each other.

On some rare occasions, when Alice was with Harry and Remus himself didn't wake by her near silent exit from his room, or the growingly rarer nights she slept in her own room, that Sirius would wake, hours earlier than usual and regardless of who was or wasn't in his bed, he'd be with her, watching the sunrise. Always he joined her as Padfoot, resting his head against her leg to comfort her, unlike at Hogwarts he wouldn't change to walk back with her or talk quietly in the light of early morning, nor make her laugh by acting silly or urge her to change and play with him. Instead, he'd sit with her from grey per-dawn until the sun fully lifted over the edge of the horizon and then trot away into the woods, leaving them to clear out the woman he'd abandoned in his bed even if there was no one night stand to abandon he'd disappear until noon and return as though he'd not been home all night, going up to his room to sleep or sketch and not appear again until supper.

Those mornings she never stayed with him and Remus tried not to worry about it, to be jealous of Harry or Sirius who were able to share the dawn with her, chasing away the nightmares she refused to talk about. It was easier with Harry, he was her twin and they shared everything, with Sirius it was harder, he knew she didn't tell him about it either but she let him be there in a way Remus himself couldn't. In some ways the beautiful witch was still so closed off from him, she was a mystery but he loved her and trusted her and was amazed everyday that she was with him, that she loved him, a werewolf.

After that day Sirius had snapped, and all but told Remus that he'd been in love with the witch, Remus was tentative around Sirius. This lasted for a week and then the darker man cuffed his friend on the shoulder and pulled him under his arm. Remus growled and they play fought, that night, a full moon, no one else joined the werewolf and dog as they played in the surrounding woods. In the morning when they woke, having fallen asleep under some trees, Sirius lay there, arms under his head.

"I knew how you felt about her." Sirius told him, not moving as Remus sat up.

"I knew how you did too." Remus told him regretfully.

"No." Sirius shook his head, "You knew I liked her, you didn't know I loved her."

"I'm sorry Sirius."

"When I saw her on the platform, she was so beautiful, so small and her eyes, those eyes held so little life in them, she was so broken. I think I was so shaken in that moment it took me longer than it should have to recognize Harry wasn't James. I didn't want to talk about her, about that moment; I couldn't explain it, so I just said she was beautiful, played it off. Every moment with her, watching her, Penny was right, I drew her almost obsessively all year, I still do, but I knew when we met her that she was too broken and then, later, I knew you liked her. I didn't know what to do, I never wanted anything to come between us but I also, I wanted her to be ok, I knew if it tore us apart that she'd be just as affected, just as hurt and I couldn't risk that. She was healing and you're so good and gentle and understanding and I knew she'd fall for you too, I knew and I watched as she did. I hated it, hated every moment but I knew you had come to love her too. I tried so hard to be ok with it, to prepare myself for that day but it still hurt when I saw it, that day furniture shopping, I saw you kissing her and I felt like you'd ripped out my heart."

"Sirius."

"I love her, but I wasn't what she needed and I'm not the one she chose. It hurts and maybe I'm not dealing with it the best way but I'm trying to, trying not to lose my brother because I've lost her and I can't lose you too, or what little I have left of her."

"I wouldn't have kissed her…"

"Probably not," Sirius agreed, "you're so good. I know I might have still done in your shoes, except I can't ever be selfish with her. I tried so hard not to be, to be what she needed me to be."

"When have you ever been selfish?"

"With every other girl." Sirius shrugged, "I'm a right bastard to them. Even before I turned into this, drunk playboy asshole, I was a bastard to them, I ignored them or looked past them, not seeing outside myself and my friends at all."

"Sirius…"

"It's ok Moony. I know, but you love her and she loves you and I love both of you so we'll be ok, all of us, we're a family after all."

"Family." Remus agreed sadly, he wasn't sure what to say or do, what could he? Sirius was right, he loved her and he wasn't willing to give her up. Leaving her would only hurt her to because she loved him, he knew she loved him though deep in his heart he knew she also loved Sirius, whether she or he let themselves see it, she had loved Sirius from the start.

After a moment Sirius shoved him, "Get some clothes on and lets get some grub."


	21. Chapter 21

Time continued to pass in easy routine, Severus spent most nights brewing, out working with the potions master or in his room only occasionally venturing out of the basement outside mealtimes, to spend time in the sitting room with the others. He, James and Sirius teased each other but in a slightly friendlier way. They weren't friends though Remus and he got along better and the two men played chess together often.

Harry wouldn't play, ever, though he'd finger the pieces sometimes, twirling them as he thought. He and Alice split up when she cheated with Frank while on an overnight Auror training exercise. Frank came and apologized and told Harry he should hit him. Harry didn't, he was a little heartbroken but the friendship survived. Frank and Alice immediately got back together, eloping only a few weeks after getting back together.

Harry, single again, went to the pub with Sirius often and picked up a bird once or twice but since his talk with Remus, Sirius had brought home fewer women and Harry had never been the type. Sirius still drank a bit to much firewhiskey but he was back to sketching instead of trying to whore away his heartache. For once, Hermione was blissfully unaware, she knew something was up with him, knew he used to like her but wouldn't for the life of her have guessed he was in love with her and not heartbroken but completely shattered she was with someone else.

Finally, the wedding came, it was a muggle ceremony, for Lily's relatives, so no magic was present at all and all the men wore suits instead of robes. Hermione thought they looked especially gorgeous. James choked up on his vows and though her voice was clear and steady, tears ran down Lily's face. There was so much love between them even Petunia who hated James and still called her sister a freak, was dabbing at her eyes and hugged Lily extra tight.

They danced late into the night and then James and Lily left for their honeymoon, two weeks on a private wizarding island in Greece. It only lasted twenty hours.

Petunia showed up at the front stoop demanding to see Hermione, Vernon in tow and a dark expression. She came seeking to speak to Hermione, since in her words, Hermione was, the least freakish of Lily's freak show friends.

Remus led them into the sitting room and soon after Hermione arrived with a tray of tea. As soon as they were alone, Hermione smiled stiffly at Pentunia and the girl burst into tears.

Petunia was sobbing on the sofa and Hermione had trouble making out the words, Vernon wrapped an arm around her shoulder in comfort and spoke up, "The Evans were in a motor accident, they've died." Petunia sobbed harder into her husband.

Hermione nodded, tears in her eyes, "I'll contact them immediately." She got up and left the room, body shaking. Remus had left to give them a little space to talk as it seemed what Petunia wanted but Severus, coming in from the garden where he'd begun to grow some potions herbs saw her pale faced and immediately grabbed her into his arms.

Coming in only a moment after and seeing her pale and shivering in his arms Sirius raised a wand angrily, "Let her go." He growled.

Severus glared back at him but Hermione sniffed and pulled back glaring at Sirius, "Stop it."

"What happened?" He demanded, worry clear in his posture.

Hermione bit back tears, "We need to floo James and Lily, have them come home."

"They've just barely gone a day ago." He frowned at her in question looking to Severus for an answer but the man just shrugged.

"Lily's parents have died." At her words Sirius sighed, his eyes closing in momentary grief, both with empathy for Lily and in remembrance of similar news coming to him and James less than two years before. He nodded and opened his eyes meeting hers, "I'll do it. Can you get in touch with her family, get the details for the funeral or what needs to be done?"

"They're still here." She nodded. Sirius nodded back and gave her a weak smile. He gave Severus a sheepish smile and shrugged putting his wand away without apology. Severus didn't expect one.

"Should I come with you?" He asked turning his attention to her.

"Please." Hermione took his hand in hers and they went back to the sitting room.

"I thought you were with the other one at the wedding." Petunia mused.

"Remus, I am, this is mine and Lily's good friend…"

"Severus." Petunia rolled her eyes, "I grew up next to him too."

"Right." Hermione blushed.

"Freaks together." She huffed under her breath before shaking herself and looking back at Hermione, "Where did they go, will she be back soon? We'll have the funeral to do…" Tears seemed to choke her as she fought to remain poised and together, her spine straightening like a steal rod. "Arrangements to be made and such."

"I'm here." Lily exclaimed coming into the room in a rush, tears already flowing as she ran to her sister, "Tell me it's not real." Petunia shook her head and stood hugging her sister, unable not to cry again, Hermione and Severus backed out of the room while James hovered near his wife.

James helped Lily grieve, taking her to the funeral and supporting her as she and Petunia met with lawyers and sold the house, all the muggle procedures were a mystery to him but James just held Lily close and supported her through it all. Neither Potter was up to the idea of returning to their honeymoon after the funeral so life went on as it had before the wedding and another year seemed to pass in the blink of an eye.

Not long after the death of Lily's parents, James and Sirius had a small misadventure in London riding his motorbike, with some Death Eaters and immediately after become embroiled in the budding war joining the Order of the Phoenix and bringing with them all the members of their little family. Harry and Hermione still worked in secret on their little project though they were unable to reach the horcruxes, they knew where they were and with some knowledge of where Death Eaters might attack they proved very useful in the order. Mad Eye was impressed by their constant vigilance, still so engrained in them they knew exits and noticed everything slightly out of place with out trying, he demanded to know why they weren't in Auror Training and when Dumbledore revealed they'd both achieved an O in all the required classes he seemed to make it a personal mission to have them in the department.

Severus was given his mastery in two years instead of three and was already brewing for the Order in large quantities out of the basement lab, which was enlarged and outfitted with everything he could ever hope to have at his disposal in a lab. Most of which he was shocked to learn, when Alice let it slip one afternoon, was paid for by James himself and not the Order.

Hermione sighed as she and Harry met in secret, they did it at least once a month, disappearing for twin night, which was really secret-mission-to-save-the-world-from-what-they'd-known-it-to-be night.

"What are you doing?"

"Lily should be pregnant now, Alice looks like a small bludger is under her shirt, Lily should too."

"You know neither of us can be born again, we're already here."

"I know." She rolled her eyes at him, "It's just, I don't know, its him. He's a baby, three months today and it's strange thinking about it, about any of it and it all feels so surreal now. We won't be there on the train to meet him, he won't ever know I maybe loved him because he won't know me, there will never be a golden trio." She bit her lip, tears stinging her eyes, "It's like it was all a dream, a terrible dream, it feels so far away, so unreal and I should be happy but he's getting so foggy and far away and I hate it. I don't want to forget them Harry."

"We wont." Harry pulled her into his arms, "We'll never forget him, or any of them." He told her, eyes searching out the chess piece on the cuff she'd given him. He pulled back and met her eyes, "I promise that we'll never forget him Mione but this is the way it has to be, that life has to be a dream, a nightmare, this is our reality, our life."

"I know." She swiped at the tears, the old nickname stung so bittersweet. She nodded and sniffled, "I know." She repeated stronger. She wanted to tell him about what else was bothering her, what had made her think so much about Ron but couldn't find the words. Harry knew everything about her but for the first time, she couldn't talk to him, because she couldn't voice the words, didn't know how to or even what it was she was thinking or feeling. Instead she hugged him and they began to discuss their next missions with the Order.


	22. Chapter 22

The following night Hermione and Remus went out for a romantic dinner, celebrating two years together and took a walk together in the woods.

"I love you Mya." Remus whispered.

"I love you too Remy, I love you so much." Her heart ached, she did love him, completely, didn't she? Yes, of course she loved him, so very, very much. They were happy together, he was so kind and understanding and supportive. They'd research together and debate different ideas, they were completely compatible and she loved him.

He kissed her, tucking hair behind her ear and smiled, "Home?" He asked.  
>Hermione nodded trying not to let her slight distraction show. She loved him, they'd been a couple for two years and barely ever even had a mild spat let alone an actually argument. No, she and Remus were perfectly compatible and good together, they always would bem she was sure of that and she loved him, loved being with him.<p>

Remus pulled her close and they went home, apparating straight into his bedroom, which they mostly shared, though she still had hers it hadn't been used in months. He made love to her and fell asleep with her wrapped in his arms breathing in her sweet scent of parchment, honey and vanilla.

When he woke she wasn't there and he followed his extra senses outside, finding her sitting in the dew damp grass of the pre-dawn by a little pond on their property.

"Mya?" He questioned gently. She looked up at him with tear stained cheeks and a watery smile. "What happened luv? What is it?"

Hermione shook her head, "I love you so much." She wasn't sure if she was confirming that for him or herself. Waking before dawn she'd slipped down to the pond to think but part of her had been waiting for Sirius, for Padfoot to come and watch the dawn with her, chasing away nightmares and worry, chasing away thoughts that crowded her head of the past and the future so nothing existed but them and the dawn. Sirius hadn't come down this morning though, hearing the backdoor she'd know it wasn't him and with his approach, she'd known the truth, though really wished she didn't, that she could pretend for a while longer because she loved him, because they were happy.

"Mya?" He questioned, afraid as he sank down beside her.

"I can't do it Remus." She bit back the sobs wanting to burst forward as she opened her mouth to break his heart. It killed her to do, she loved him so much and he didn't deserve to be hurt but she couldn't stay with him now.

"What?" He could barely breathe in fear of what was to come.

Hermione reached into a pocket and pulled out a little box, a little box with his mothers ring in it. "I found it, I wasn't snooping but I found it a few days ago and I was so scared you would ask last night and then I was relieved you didn't." She started to sob unable to hold back, hating herself a little as she broke his heart, "I love you so much Remy, I do, I love you."

Remus pulled the sobbing witch into his arms to comfort her even as his heart broke in his chest, knives slicing it open. "I know Mya. I know, I love you too, I love you so much."

"I'm sorry Remy. I'm so sorry."

"It's ok. Shh. It's ok." He comforted her and fought the tears burning his own eyes. After a while she stopped crying and they sat in the silent stillness of the morning as the sun rose around them.

"It's ok if you aren't ready." He told her, "I understand Mya and I love you."

"Were you going to ask last night?" She questioned with a sniffle, had he changed his mind at the last, realized it wasn't right?

"This morning." He admitted, the irony of it stabbed another knife in his heart, "The start of a new day and new life together."

"I'm sorry."

"It's ok." He hugged her to him not wanting to accept what he already knew. "We don't have to talk about it now." He rubbed her back, "You just aren't ready."

Sniffling she pulled away and handed him the box shaking her head "No," She met his eyes, "I'm not ready."

He forced a smile but only one corner of his mouth went up, "Later, next year or in five years, it doesn't matter."

Fresh tears welled in her eyes as she shook her head, "I'm sorry Remy."

"Mya, please." He hated that he was begging her, "I love you, you love me." He reminded her.

"I do, I do love you Remy, so very much."

"So we won't talk about this." He put away the box, "We'll just, be together and forget that for now, for however long you want."

She reached out and touched his cheek as fresh tears fell and she shook her head, "I found it and I was afraid, so afraid you would ask and so relieved you hadn't, Remy it shouldn't be like that."

"It's to soon is all." He argued but she shook her head and took back her hand pulling away from him. "Mya."

"I'm so sorry Remy. So sorry." She got up, "We can't be together Remy, we can't stay together." She told him sadly, walking away from him, holding herself together as she cried. Remus curled in on himself as pain sliced through him. In the house Hermione went into her own room, curled on her bed and cried. She had almost cried herself to sleep when the door cracked open and Harry slipped in, shutting the door he crept to the bed and slid in with her, holding her in his arms. "Remus was going to propose." She told him after a moment.

Harry nodded solemnly, he'd known, they'd all known. Remus had asked him and sat down with Sirius for a long time. The darker wizard was still so broken, two years she'd been with Remus and Sirius was still painfully in love with her. He'd disappeared with James after talking with Remus and the two men had spent all night drinking firewhisley, the next day Sirius took up Auror training and took more missions from the order, at home he was quiet and withdrawn sketching. They all hurt for him but Sirius had given his blessing to his best friend, told him all he wanted was for Remus and Hermione to be happy.

None of them had really thought they wouldn't be celebrating the couple's engagement that night. After two years together, Remus and Hermione were an envious couple, clearly in love and as compatible as two matching puzzle pieces. "You said no?"

"I love him so much Harry but I can't marry him." Harry rubbed her back not sure what to say, his mind couldn't seem to focus on the situation, instead it caught onto the shock that for once in a very long time, she had surprised him. The whole situation felt completely surreal and he wasn't sure how to comfort her with words so he just held her to him. She cried in his arms until exhaustion claimed her.

No one mentioned the breakup. James tried to be there for Remus but he'd never had his heartbroken, he'd fallen in love with Lily from the start and while it took him a while to get his girl, he did. Sirius understood heartbreak, the girl he'd fallen in love with had chosen another man but couldn't be there for his friend the way he wanted to be, not with it being this girl, his girl. She'd broken both their hearts and he tried but couldn't make it better. Oddly it was Severus who could and the friendship between the two wizards grew. Both James and Sirius, who had been kind but not overtly friendly with the man they'd lived with for so long, were grateful. More than grateful, suddenly Severus realized he wasn't just Lily and Hermione's family now, that these boys he'd once hated and now tolerated, had become his family too, his brothers. He'd earned their trust and respect in his time living in their basement, now he'd earned their love as they had earned his, though none of them had quite realized it until then. Severus wasn't sure what to do with that but it amazed him to realize, they were family in his mind and his heart, brothers, they'd always tease and taunt each other, never really get along but he'd die for them and they'd do the same for him.

Remus and Severus would spend hours together playing chess while Sirius sketched or in the garden growing potions ingredients while James and Harry raced their brooms around the yard.

Things were awkward between Remus and Hermione for a while and at one point Lily wanted to shout at them to stop being ridiculous and get back together, they were so clearly still in love with each other. She refrained, with some difficulty. They hated to see both friends like this but whatever had happened between them, neither spoke about it and they were both trying very hard to maintain their friendship, no one wanted to rock that boat and tear their little family apart. Things were strained enough between them all though the war was proving a distraction to keep them all busy and thoughts focused on bigger problems than one, unfortunate, confusing, breakup.


	23. Chapter 23

Two months after the end of Hermione's relationship with Remus, she was throwing herself into her mission, working long hours with Kingsley and Mad-Eye for the Order or with Harry using their knowledge of how things went in the past future to prevent or alter some events and to plan and plot their obtainment of the other horcruxes as well as developing how best to destroy them all at one time when the time came. With all of them working on various missions, many in secret known only to select other members of the order, the comings and goings at the house were hard to track and one leaving the house in the morning could return for lunch or be gone without word for up to a week.

It was a rare moment when most of the residents were home that Lily announced she was pregnant. It happened to be on the same day that Hermione showed up at the house with Regulus Black in tow.

"What's going on?" She asked glancing from one to the other as the celebratory sounds died down and they all faced her and Regulus, faces having gone from joyous to furious in an instant.

"You tell us." Sirius spat glaring murder at his baby brother, "What the hell are you doing here?"

Regulus swallowed and nodded at Hermione in answer.

"I brought him." Hermione told him looking to Harry, "It was time."

He nodded and looked from them to the others, "Here though?"

"Why not?" She asked with a frown, "It's our home and he's family."

"He's Death Eater scum." James hissed pulling Lily closer and a little behind him.

"Family." Sirius growled, "Not to any of us."

"Sirius." Hermione tried but he cut her off with a furious glare.

"Check his arm." Remus sighed, sad eyes meeting hers, "He's not a suspected Death Eater Luv, he is one."

"I know." She answered slowly, calm, "He's defected."

Sirius snorted, "He's a liar and a good one. True Slytherin from the moment he crawled out of my mother's satanic womb."

"He saved my life last night."

Regulus snorted, "I wouldn't have had to if you weren't there."

She rolled her eyes at him; "Somebody had to stop you from doing anything stupid and getting yourself killed."

"I don't think anyone here would have objected."

"Shut up Regulus." She turned back to the others, "He's turned against them, I know he's done some bad things but he's trying to make up for them."

"We'll bring him to the Order." Harry spoke up.

"No." Regulus protested.

Hermione shook her head in agreement, "Kingsley is letting Dumbledore and the others know about the situation but he needs to stay in a safe house while we get all the information he has about them and we've agreed it's best if he stays with me."

"Mya." Severus tried, "He's a believer, he's always been a believer, from day one, the first talk about Voldemort rising among students in Slytherin and he already worshiped the guy."

"I was wrong." Regulus growled. "That man is a whack job, he'll do anything to get what he wants and it doesn't matter who suffers. Sirius, he killed dad."

"What?" Sirius looked truly shocked, he hadn't heard his father was dead.

"He sent Kretcher to die for no reason, he just doesn't care about any life!" Regulus raged, "Kretcher was able to get to me though and I saved his life, I defied that psycho and he killed our father, would have killed me too. He had our own cousin came after me, Bella, tried to kill me! He told her to and she came after me no questions and only she" he pointed at Hermione, "helped me get away, Bella's husband almost caught her but" he shrugged, "I couldn't leave her to die." He glared at Hermione, "What you were even doing there!"

"The Order knew you went against him." She shrugged, "Kingsley and I were assigned to watch you for weeks, Harry and Mad-Eye traded off with us."

Regulus shook his head at her and looked back at his brother, "I was wrong Sirius."

"About him?"

"Yes."

"What about me?"

"You turned your back on our family." Regulus frowned at him seemingly unsure about what his brother was asking.

"What about Lily?" Sirius spat.

"Lily?" Regulus looked confused, "Potter's mudblood wife? What does she have to do with anything?"

"Get out." Sirius ordered wand in his brother's face.

"He's on our side Sirius." Hermione protested before glaring at Regulus, "Foul mouth or not."

"Foul soul." Sirius hissed, "He's not welcome here."

"One snake wasn't enough for you." Hermione spun as she saw Peter entering the room.

"What are you doing here?"

"James let me move in yesterday." He smiled darkly at her. "I've left the pie shop and come to work for the order."

Hermione stared at him open mouthed before shooting him with a vicious glare, he was up to something, she could feel it to her bones. He was up to something and it wasn't anything good for Sirius, not for James and Lily or Remus either and she had no doubt his move to betray and destray his friends would include her and Harry this time to. If they let him manipulate them and she wouldn't, she wouldn't let him hurt her family again, "You lying scheming little rat." She hissed at him, "What are you really doing here?"

"Slytherin loving whore." He spat back lifting his wand.

Much faster and without any hesitation, Regulus hexed him and Sirius cursed him back. Harry immediately set up a protection wall, before anything serious could happen or any harsher spells were used. "Enough!" He demanded. "Call my sister a whore again and it'll be my wand you meet Peter." He turned to Hermione, "Peter's not our enemy Mya."

"Isn't he?" She demanded back. They shared a look that spoke volumes, no Harry didn't trust him either but she'd said it herself once, keep your friends close and your enemies closer. If Peter was returning with any intention of doing harm, it was better to keep a close eye on him than have him able to manipulate the others behind their backs.

"He's not staying here." James shook his head, attention completely on Regulus, with a scowl so dark it could do Severus proud, the Professor version of him from her past.

Peter looked at him wide eyed, automatically thinking James meant him, expecting him to choose the witch over him, but James was staring at Hermione. "Severus was one thing, he _is_ family but Regulus isn't welcome here, he's not welcome anywhere near my wife or _my_ brother." He emphasized the last sneering at Regulus as his hand rested on Sirius's shoulder.

Regulus snorted, "Fuck yourself Potty, I want nothing to do with your lowbrow _wife_ or _my _blood-traitor brother."

"Shut up Regulus." Hermione hissed at him. He reminded her so much of Draco in their school days that she wanted to hit him. If Draco could be changed by the war, see the truth out from Voldemort's horror and his father's influence then so could Regulus, he could be saved. She could save him.

"He can't stay Mya." Remus shook his head, agreeing with James.

"Fine," She conceded, she could set him up in a safe house and in time they'd see he really had defected, they'd see him trying to help them and give him a chance to really change. "I'll find him somewhere else but I wont live with that rat." Keeping enemies close was one thing, having him sleep down the hall was another, watching him worm his way into her family, manipulating and then betraying them, plotting to send Sirius to Azkaban, no he wouldn't see the inside of one of those cells this time, she wouldn't let him spend one moment in the company of those Dementors.

"He's our family." Sirius protested.

"Regulus is your family." She snapped back. He just had to trust her, he needed to see that Regulus could be saved, Peter couldn't. Peter was rotten to his core, a coward, a rat, a manipulative bastard who would only betray them all.

The look of anger on his face cut her to the soul, she'd never seen him look at her with anything like it. He didn't trust her.

"He's staying Mya." James told her, standing taller. "You and Lily put your foot down about Sev and we're putting our foot down about Peter. He's one of us, he always has been.

"Mya." Remus spoke gently and she looked at him, her heart breaking again as he chose Peter.

"Sirius." She met his cold gray eyes. How many mornings had she spent with him? Padfoot's head resting on her thigh as the sun rose around them. From the beginning he'd seen her, he'd understood her nightmares and her instincts, he wouldn't turn his back on her, she knew he wouldn't. He didn't understand about Regulus but that was ok, he'd see but he'd understand about Peter, he'd trust her instincts, even if he didn't believe her, he'd stand beside her over him.

Sirius said nothing as he glared at her, arms crossed, choosing Peter. If it was her or Peter, he was choosing the rat.

She shook her head, her heart breaking, the cold steal of his eyes slicing strips through her heart in a way she'd never felt. With one look he flayed her and shattered her. Hate for Peter rose up inside of her, a darkness the pulsed deep and powerful. Betrayal shone in her eyes as she and Sirius stared at each other even as fear filled her, feeding that hate even she prayed for his sake that he was right and she was wrong, that Peter could be trusted, this time he wouldn't betray his friends. He'd been separate from them a long time now and had realized their friendship was worth more than anything. She prayed for it to be true but no part of her believed it.

She finally tore her eyes from Sirius and looked to Harry, "You know you can't trust him, you _know._"

He said nothing as their eyes met, they didn't need words. Harry knew and he'd watch over them all. He'd protect their family while she continued their work. For the first time, they'd have to be apart, they'd have to walk on separate paths, for the first time since they met she wouldn't be beside him. She nodded to Harry, though leaving Harry added a fresh wave of fear to feed the blackness rising. She nodded to Harry and tugged Regulus's arm, "Come on."

"Wait." Severus growled, "You aren't going anywhere alone with him." He moved forward and she nodded giving him a weak smile and taking his hand. Grateful to her very soul for a friend like him. Severus had never been given enough credit for his bravery, for his loyalty and the unending devotion of his heart once he let you in it. His palm wrapping around her smaller one pushed the darkness and fear back a little. She wouldn't be with Harry but neither of them would ever have to fight this fight alone.

Together the three of them left, walking to the apparition point since Regulus couldn't apparate on the property.

Breaking the quiet as they walked away from their home, towards the apparition point, Severus was the one to tell her, "Lily's pregnant."

"She is?" Hermione smiled at him, the joy didn't reach her eyes though, fear was twisting in her gut but the painful shards of her heart made it difficult to breath and each shattered piece inside her reflected cold steal eyes.

"Yeah." Severus nodded, "That's what we were celebrating in there. She tried to wait until you got back but no one knew when it would be, when you work with Kingsley you've been gone a couple hours to a couple days."

"It's ok, I'm really happy for them." She forced another smile and grabbed Regulus's arm and Severus squeezed her hand as they apparated to Spinners End.


	24. Chapter 24

"This place is a hole." Regulus growled as they made their way up to the manor and inside. Completely neglected since Severus moved in with them the place was even more run down than when she'd dragged him out of it, forcefully removing him from the dump and installing him in their home.

"Shut up and suck it up Princess." Hermione snapped. They'd make the best of it, besides, fixing the place would be a good distraction, the perfect project to keep her busy between missions so she didn't have to think, didn't have to close her eyes and see those cold gray eyes.

Severus showed them to the least rundown rooms and Hermione banished Regulus to his while she and Severus went to the shops and returned to start some repairs. Working as a potions master was finally bringing in some of his own money but even with the closed off, hard shell she presented, Severus could see how fragile she was so he said nothing about her paying for his house to be fixed. He just let her renovate however she wanted, dragging her to the lab to brew when she wouldn't sleep. They were both tired and had lost a bit of weight, Kreatcher had come with Regulus and grumbled at them but prepared meals, Mya barely touched them though and slept less than she ate. Severus hated it and didn't know how to help.

He asked Harry after an order meeting one night but the man just shook his head and shrugged, "We've never been able to get rid of the nightmares, the dreams make us remember and a spell we did to survive will make us keep dreaming. The wizard smiled tired, "We share the dreams Severus and I promise she'll be ok. Right now, all you can do is what you have been, just be there for her, it helps, I promise."

He still worried and despite his words, Severus knew Harry did too. He knew she used to watch the sunrise finding peace in the early light but she seemed to avoid it now, hiding in the library with curtains drawn. What little she slept was in the afternoon, she still had nightmares and he'd rub her back or sit with his back to the sofa so her little fist gripped his robes at his shoulder, touch seemed to make them better so after two weeks he dragged her into his own room to sleep at night holding her against the nightmares.

Seeing any of the Marauders in meetings for the Order was hard, she kept him close to her but sat near Harry and chatted with Lily. She gave nothing more than tight smiles to James, Remus and Sirius but Severus could see the pain in the depths of her chocolate eyes. Seeing Peter made her seethe with anger and a fierce darkness of hate would make her almost shake with rage even as her eyes reflected soul deep pain and fear.

Once they were left alone, just for a moment, before a meeting began and Severus realized she'd orchestrated it. Harry seemed to be holding the other back from entering, distracting them long enough to give her this time.

Severus watched out for the door as he saw her viciously spell the little rat with a silencing curse that locked him in place, the curse was done wordlessly as she glared at him and gave an evil smirk when he went to speak.

"If something happens to Lily or that baby, to any of them, I'll kill you." She whispered. It was a simple threat, one many might make in heated fury but her voice was ice and only grew colder, "If your eyes so much as flicker to my brother with anything approximating a threat or if I find out you've done anything to betray him or even just ignored a possible threat to him, I'll spell your skin to strip from your body, flaying you alive, then I'll leave you like that, in the woods so that animals can slowly finish you off." Oeter swallowed and she took a tiny step forward, "And if anything _anything_ ever happens to Sirius, if one curse, one hex touches him when you should have his back out there, you'll wish Voldemort held you captive because I _promise_ you, what I will do, will be more painful and last infinitely longer and when that magic results in a sentence of the dementors kiss, my joy will be so dark, so filled with hate that I'll receive it's kiss with a smile and that's nothing to what I'll do if you betray him, if _you_ are the one to hurt him."

The words chilled Severus to the bone and Peter looked like he was ready to wet himself, whether from what she said or whatever was in her eyes as she said it. If a man could die of fear, Peter might have. She waited until he gave an approximation of a nod, before she stepped back and broke eye contact. The effect as she walked away was almost as chilling, she turned and without looking back, wandlessly and wordless released him. The act a clear warning to him of her power and skill, she walked out of the room and Severus shivered following after her.

They went into the meeting and sat in the back. Peter stayed on the far side of the room when they entered and wouldn't look in their direction at all. The meeting itself was relatively short, Hermione and Harry shared a passing moment, then she led the way outside.

They never spoke of the moment and as soon as they left the building and stepped into the sun the cold dark shroud around her dissipated, maybe because Harry had looked over at her, a look passed between them and she relaxed as though whatever darkness that had possessed her was freed and she turned back to him with a small smile, "Let's stop at the apothecary, we need more blood replenishing potions."

During those few months they had made Spinner's End their home, she could almost murder Regulus on a daily basis. They did fully fix up Spinner's End and the Manor house was nicer than Severus could ever remember it being, it was warm and homey, welcoming. It was also one less thing for the younger wizard to bitch about because Regulus was nothing if not spoiled. Unlike his brother, he was able to sit still for long periods of time and would spend hours reading in Severus's library but unlike Sirius he didn't handle boredom well and would complain, finding anything to bitch about. He was decent at potions and would help them brew occasionally. Mostly he hung around the house, bored and similar to Harry, playing with a snitch. He'd debate pure-blood ideology with both of them and his arrogance reminded Hermione almost painfully of Draco. He conceded that maybe blood didn't make a difference in magical ability but was steadfast that some families were just better than others, namely the pure-blood families were better because they were more pure. He would probably always be a bigot but he didn't preach hate or even believe in it, he felt superior to others because of his family but even conceded the point that marrying a mudblood wouldn't lessen his child's superiority because his child would be his and thus a Black. Hermione could only shake her head at him and try not to strangle him. She couldn't quite avoid hexing him once in a while but it was only mild hexes which would start duels, Severus suspected this was the bored wizards intention all along as he purposely drove the witch insane and then grinned at she hexed him, starting the duel. She was good, very good and they gave each other pointers as they blocked and hexed, fighting until they went from mild hexes to silly curses and ended up in fits of laughter, collapsed on nearby furniture or just dropping to the floor breathless after having run through the entire house as they play fought.

Regulus, despite his overall obnoxious, spoiled, elitist prat attitude was good for her. Once you got past the arrogant blood purist, he was an intelligent wizard, excellent conversationalist and he made the petite witch laugh, chasing away some of the darkness still haunting her. Sometimes she'd look at him though and Severus wondered if the young wizard, somewhat similar to his older brother in looks if not temperament, was also painful for her to be around. He shook his head in regret, maybe if he'd told Lily how he felt before she'd fallen in love with James things would have turned out different for him or maybe if Lily hadn't accepted her love for James in seventh year they'd be apart now and miserable, Severus wouldn't have found brothers in former enemies and have Lily and Hermione both in his life the way he did, maybe they'd all have been miserable. He thought this because he couldn't help but wonder how things would be different if it had been Sirius to kiss Hermione instead of Remus. If they had accepted, back in seventh year, the love Severus had always seen between them. How would things have been different if Sirius had told her how he felt? He supposed they'd never know, not anymore than he'd ever know if he'd talked to Lily or if she hadn't given in to the love she'd had for James. One thing Severus knew, if Hermione and Harry hadn't arrived at Hogwarts his own life would have been a much darker and sadder place because he had no doubt it was this witch who had given him back his friendship with Lily and given him the chance at a family with people who'd once hated him as much as he hated them. It was something he could never repay her for but wished he could.

Severus couldn't repair whatever was going on between her and Sirius but Regulus was so delightfully and annoyingly Regulus that whatever similarity in his profile she saw to make her sad, lasted only a moment and then annoyance tinged with amusement would overcome her at whatever Regulus had decided to do then. Severus wondered at times if it weren't purposeful, did the younger wizard notice these dark, sad moments and purposely pull her from them? He'd never know. Regardless, how ever annoyed with the younger man he became, his gratitude outweighed it and his respect if not admiration for the wizard grew in their months together. His relationship with Hermione and his ability in the potions room at least kept Severus from hexing him at any rate. So it was in those months, Hermione and Severus had been divided from their family but a smaller, somewhat darker family was created as well. Severus hoped Hermione wasn't just right about the younger wizard, and the more time that passed the more convinced he was, but he also hoped that one day both families could be united and maybe then, they'd banish the darkness in her heart and sadness haunting her eyes for good.


	25. Chapter 25

In hiding from the Death Eaters, after having stolen the locket and given it to Hermione, he couldn't even go outside and they put a Fidelous charm on Spinners End to keep them all safe. At least, they thought they were safe.

The attack came in the night but the moment the first ward was breached Hermione was awake, wand at the ready. She apparated into Severus's room, she didn't have time to be embarrassed that he wore only black briefs, his lean frame spread across the bed on full display.

"Mya?" He frowned at her, the crack of apparition waking him instantly.

"Someone's in the house." She whispered.

"Yeah, he's a tosser but you want to keep him safe, stupid Gryfindor noble save people even if they want to be left to their miserable existence." He grumbled, still half asleep.

"Shut up Sev." She hissed.

"Mya?" He questioned again. Though teasing he knew it was serious and had already gotten up and pulled on slacks.

"What?"

"Lovely as you are in that tiny top and miniscule shorts, perhaps you'd like a pair of my track pants?"

She flushed and nodded, he handed them to her and she quickly spelled them to fit. "You realize only someone given our location could find my home?" He reminded her.

"There are spies in every war Sev." She reminded him, "Our people wouldn't sneak about like this. You get to Reg, I'll create a diversion."

"Not a chance." He growled. "You get him out."

She rolled her eyes and nodded, "Be careful, they're coming through the last ward."

He nodded and she disappeared with a crack landing in the middle of Regulus's empty room. With a quick check of the bathroom down the hall she ran and with another loud crack as the first explosion sounded she arrived in the library. Regulus was already dueling Walden McNair. Hermione sent a vicious curse at him but a cackle raised the hairs on the back of her neck and she was quickly focusing her attention on Bellatrix as her husband and brother-in-law moved in on Regulus. Lucius Malfoy came in with Peter Pettigrew and her blood boiled, "You sick son-of-a-bitch, weak, fucking coward, fat fucking shite rat!" She raged.

"Tut tut, what a mouth." Lucius smirked at her.

"Fuck yourself."

"A fighter." Her blood ran cold at the voice as the last Death Eater entered the tiny library.

She shut her eyes as her whole body convulsed in fear and disgust, Draco killed him, Draco killed him, Draco killed him. This is just another nightmare. Draco killed him. It's what she reminded herself of after every nightmare, what she reminded Harry of every time he raged about killing the werewolf himself; Draco killed him. Her couldn't hurt her. He was dead and Draco had killed him. Only Draco was an infant just barely out of his mothers womb.

"She has a thing for werewolves." Peter's laugh made her want to retch.

"Funny that, since I have a thing for petite little witches with fight in them." Greyback laughed, "Must be fate." Hermione screamed as she was tossed to him, her body was frozen in fear, everything inside of her curled up as the memories flooded back in brutal clarity. She threw up on Roduphous as they passed, barely registering the crumpled form of Regulus whose eyes stared unseeingly after her.

A sob rose in her throat, for the boy who'd become her annoying little brother over the last few months, for the innocent girl she used to be, before Death Eaters, before Greyback, for the knowledge deep in her soul that said she wouldn't survive this again. She didn't want to, wanted to fight back, to force them to kill her instead of handing her off to the insane werewolf but fear held her frozen because if she didn't survive this, Harry would die too. Somehow she had to survive, had to get free, to find Severus, please let Severus be alive. In the back of it all was the soul deep slice, scaring her with the knowledge that she'd failed. She hadn't saved Regulus, maybe what little they had done wasn't enough, maybe they hadn't really changed anything. Regulus was dead. She had gotten to know him, care for him had sworn she would protect him and he was dead.

* * *

><p>Harry felt a wave go through him and bolted from bed, racing through the house he set off every alarm he could, in minutes the Order was gathering in their kitchen. Hermione, Regulus and Severus excepting.<p>

"Mya." He was panting and pale, "Mya." Mad Eye had made him wait as they checked the house but he knew, he could feel it. "Hermione. I'm sorry. Mione." He could barely breath and Lily did her best to comfort him. He hadn't been with her and something bad had happened, she was alive but some things were worse than death. He couldn't breathe, somehow he had to find her.

The Aurors were back in minutes.

"Regulus." Sirius growled. Rage and fear making his body tremble.

"Dead." An auror reported and glanced at the man, "Sorry." Sirius went completely still, Regulus was dead? How? Why?

"Dead?" Sirius frowned dropping into a chair, "My brother's dead?"

The auror nodded, "Avada in the library. The place was pretty torn up. Severus Snape and Mya James weren't there."

"Mya." Harry repeated, "Where are you Maya?"

"Looks like she and" the auror met his eyes with regret.

"She's not dead." Harry knew that, he could still feel her, feel their connection.

"She's a traitor." Peter spoke up, entering the room, looking a little worse for wear "She was trying to bring that Slytherin in to spy on us, she's a Death Eater."

Harry spun on him, but Kingsley nodding shocked him into stillness, "Harry." Kingsley gave him a sympathetic look, "She was part of the attack on several muggles only a moment ago."

"She blew up a bus of them, luckily it's so late only seven were on it."

"It wasn't her!" Harry spat, shaking his head, "Mya's not a Death Eater!"

"She's a traitor." Peter's sneer barely hiding the glee in his eyes.

He spun on Peter, "Blew up people? She did? Hermione would never. How could you even know anything about it? Where were you? Where have you been tonight?"

"It's true Harry." Frank spoke up trying to calm him, regret warring with anger and disbelief. He'd seen it himself but couldn't really comprehend the truth of it, not from her. "I was there."

"It wasn't her." Harry was shaking, rage making magic rise up in an uncontrolled wave through him, "Tell me where she is, what you did." He hissed, darkness and rage focused entirely on Peter. He knew, he knew to the core of his being this had been Peter, he knew at though she was standing beside him shouting it. Peter had been behind this.

"She's a death eater." Peter snapped, "A traitor who's betrayed us all. Who knows how much information she's given them, how many muggleborns she's helped them kill. She certainly didn't hesitate tonight."

"Not Hermione!" Harry snapped. "Mya's a muggleborn." He couldn't fight agains the rage and darkness, somewhere deep he knew part of that was her. One couldn't live where the other didn't, if one let the dark consume them than it would consume both. This darkness rose in each of them, feeding into each other but if he could feel it, she was alive and still fighting. He had to find her, he needed them to help him or get out of his way but first that rat wasn't leaving here, not free, not this time. "She's not my twin by blood, she's my twin by magic and everyone we've ever known or loved was killed by them!" The admission spilled out without thought, it was time. This was the end, there could be no more secrecy, he'd get her back if he had to take on Voldemort and his Death Eaters alone. He'd get her back and end the war. It was time to end it and they'd either find peace at last or start new lives, lives free of this hatred once and for all.

"I saw her." Peter returned, unsure now. Their secrets were his undoing, if this were true he'd never get away with it. Except, darkness stirred in his gut and he fought a smirk, Sirius had been her secret keeper, Sirius and Harry. Her secrets would take Sirius down, not him. He was just following orders, doing his job, reporting what he'd seen. "Frank and I both did, we were following the Carrow's together when they met up with her and Greyback." He smirked, feeling the win as he tossed the last part in, sealing the deal, and her fate as a traitor, maybe Sirius's too. "She has a thing for werewolves I guess."

Harry had gone paler, completely white and his body began to shake, "Greyback." The name was poison on his tongue and he lifted his wand again, the darkness and rage boiled over, "You lying rat."

Peter backed away as they all tried to subdo the young wizard, "Harry." Lily's voice was quivering and empathetic.

"HE RAPED HER!" Harry bellowed, "She wouldn't go with him! Not ever, she was terrified of him, the only thing she was ever afraid of BECAUSE HE RAPED HER, HE MADE ME WATCH AS HE VIOLATED HER AND YOU BETRAYED HER SENT HER WITH THAT THAT ANIMAL!" Darkness, rage and pain swirled up uncontrollable and blasted out of him as he pointed his wand and shouted "AVADA KEDAVRA!" The sharp green light barely missed Peter as he became a rat. The kitchen was chaos then, rescue plans and plans to hunt Peter, and demands to know who the secret keeper had been, who had known where they were.

Harry shoved past all of them, there was no light, no goodness, only revenge and hatred in his soul. James tried to stop him and Harry spun on the three marauders, "You chose that rat over her! She told you, she told you and you didn't believe her, you chose him over her!" His eyes sought out Sirius and held them, "You will regret this, _everyday_ for the rest of your life. You turned your back on her, you trusted him and this is _your _fault. She would have _died_ to protect you. Whatever he does to her, it's on you." He spun away with a loud crack.

Sirius felt his soul curling in on itself as he sank to the floor, "It was me, she made me the secret keeper. Only Harry and I knew." He shook his head in disbelief, "I never told him, I never told where they were." He looked up pleading at his friends, "I never trusted anyone with her. I'd never trust anyone else with her. Not Peter," His eyes sought out James, "Not even you."

James nodded, he knew it was true because he'd wanted to bring her some of the things from the basement a few months before and Sirius had refused to give him the address, instead he'd brought boxes to the next Order meeting for her and Severus to bring home themselves. Sirius had stood with him about Peter but he hadn't completely trusted him after that day either and had made James question it too. It was more than not fully trusting Peter. Sirius wouldn't tell him or Remus where she was either; he'd have died before telling anyone where she was so how had the Death Eaters found them? Where was she now and what were they doing to her?


	26. Chapter 26

Hermione woke, lips dry and cracked, cold in a cell. She shivered and felt a hand touch her arm. She jumped with a shriek, shaking in fear.

"It's me." Severus croaked, "It's me." She burst into tears and fell into his arms. Grateful he was alive, that they both were. Reg wasn't though, she had failed him, failed Sirius, failed them all. She'd tried to make a difference, to make it better but she'd failed.

Carefully Severus held her to him and let her cry. When she finished he pulled back a little, she didn't seem to want to let him go, "Water." He explained, she nodded and pried her fingers slowly from him. Severus hesitated and took her hand walking her the few feet to the bottle and picked it up handing it to her to drink, he took a sip and set it down before sitting and tugging her down. He settled her into his lap and let her cling to him.

"I'm not sure where we are." Severus whispered.

"Malfoy Manor, in the dungeons." Now that her eyes had adjusted to the dark she recognized the place.

"How do you…"

She cut him off as her nails dug into his skin, "Good, this is good."

"How is this good?"

"He has it." She whispered.

"Who has what?"

"Lucius Malfoy, he has the diary."

"What diary?"

"Voldemort's diary." She grinned and stood up to pace, shaking off the fear, pushing back the pain and darkness to focus, she'd failed Reg but she could still make Voldemort pay, she could still save Ron and Ginny, Fred and by extention poor broken George. Draco and Blaise, NArcissa, Lavender, Molly and Arthur, Sirius. If she got out of here and ended this war, she'd go after that rat, go after him and make him pay for Reg and for the other Sirius who'd spent thirteen years in Azkaban and for Harry who'd grown up without parents. She'd focus and get out of here, end this war and then, then she'd end Peter Pettigrew. "We have to get out of here and up to the library, we have to get it and get out of here. They'll know, of course they will so we'll have to do it fast. I'll go to the bank and you'll have to get to Harry, quickly, you'll have to find him and tell him it's time."

"Mya." Severus stilled her, "What are you talking about?"

"The horcrux." She whispered, "It's here, upstairs." She could see him trying to process, "I'm going to try to bring down my occlumency walls, they're part of a spell so I don't know if I can but try to have look." She urged him.

He nodded looking deep into her eyes and focused on using Legilmency. Her walls were strong and not much came through he pulled back shaking his head, "I can't see." He tells her at her frown he pulled her tight, "I don't need to."

"Severus." She protests, he needed to understand, to believe her.

"I don't need to Mya, I trust you." She hugged him tighter as tears came again and he hugged her back until they heard someone coming.

Hermione started to shake at the memory of Greyback, "Do you know where it is?"

"The book?"

"The book, the library, the exit."

"No, yes and maybe."

"Ok." He nods and pulls away taking her hand in his, "Good enough for me." At her skeptical look he smirked, "Need me to say it then?"

"What?"

"I'd die for you, you stupid witch, I'd rather not though so let's hope this stupid Gryffindor moment passes quickly and we both get out alive."

She chuckled through the tears and squeezed his hand, "Me too, for you."

"I know." He nodded as Lucius appeared.

"Hello." He grinned at them and focused on Hermione, "Greyback was very disappointed the Dark Lord wouldn't let him keep you but he thought it would better motivate our friend here to have you with us."

"Motivate me?" Severus growled.

"Our Lord wanted the traitor dead, she's just a bonus but you, you Severus are a man whose reputation precedes him and a good potions master is so hard to find." Lucius smirked, "He'd like to recruit you so to show you his greatness, he's decided to let you keep her. Do well and she's safe, don't and we hurt her." Lucius grinned lasciviously at her, "What fun that would be."

Hermione shrunk back against Severus who tightened his grip on her hand. "Look at me, not her you inbred ponce."

Lucius glared at him and Severus smirked, slipping easily into the older man's head and reading what he needed. Backing out of his mind he shoved Hermione hard to the side, Lucius frowned caught off guard as the girl caught her balance and spun on Severus in shock, automatically reaching for her missing wand. It was the distraction Severus needed to do something stupidly Gryffindor and he tackled the blond wizard in true muggle fashion. Getting up he punched the wizard, having grabbed his wand he forced it to work for him and he and Hermione locked him in.

"Library?" Severus growled.

"Um…" Hermione panted as they ran, "This way!" She shouted and they ran up and through the room she was tortured in, around the corner to the stairs and into a very shocked Narcissa, a tiny baby in a sling around her. "NO!" Hermione stopped Severus as he raised the wand, moving in front of the witch only a few years older than her. She spun to Narcissa, and in the beautiful young witches eyes she saw the poised and strong woman she would become, the woman who would defy light and dark to protect her son and bring him into this world "He lied. The Dark Lord didn't help you keep Draco, he stopped having his follower slip you another potion to miscarry. He wanted Lucius, he wanted Malfoy money and he manipulated you both for it." She gestured to the boy, "His name is Draco, right? Born on the fifth of June, it was to early for him but he survived and he's strong now and he's beautiful. He'll grow up beautiful with silver bond hair and pale eyes. A spoiled, elitist brat but beautiful and he has goodness in him, buried deep… very deep but he's good, will be good and you don't want this life for him. Voldemort will only get worse, he's a deranged half-blood who's brain-washed your husband and will end up killing you and your son, please. Draco is so good, he can be so good and have such a long beautiful life. Please. That maniac, he's not like you, he doesn't care about anyof you, he'd kill your infant son to get what he wants and one day when Draco's a little older he will use him, torure him and then kill him. Voldemort doesn't care that he's beautiful, he hates that Draco is good, will try to destroy that in him and for what? Blood purity? Your leader is a half blood named Tom Riddle, he's not after protecting the pure-blood lines. He doesn't care if you all die and in the end, he'll kill your son like he killed Regulus and Orion Black." Narcissa was staring at her in shock, her son was only a few months old, she hadn't made the announcements yet, no one but the family knew his name. Slowly she nodded, hands covering the small form of her sleeping son, "The library?"

"We keep dark artifacts in the basement." She whispered.

"No one could tell it's dark unless they knew what to look for and no one would. It's just a book, a journal he gave your husband, it looks blank but older with a black leather cover."

"The desk in his office." Narcissa pointed and Hermione grabbed Severus by the arm again and began running. In the office she grabbed up the journal and spun as they heard the noise coming towards them.

"Exit!" Severus shouted at her, stolen wand pointing at the door.

"DOBBY!" She shouted. "DOBBY!"

"I is Dobby." A house elf appeared and she could have cried she was so happy to see him. To see him now, to see him alive.

"Please get us out of here."

"Master be very angry. Dobby is a good elf. Dobby no make master angry."

"Dobby is a great elf." Hermione sobbed sinking down to her knees, "Dobby is the best elf. One day, Dobby will be free, he'll go to work at Hogwarts and he'll have so many friends and be treated so nice. Dobby is _great_ elf." She sobbed looking at him, "The best best elf and he's my friend." She met his eyes, "Please Dobby. Please." Dobby blinked wide eyes at her and nodded, taking Severus by the wrist and holding her hand he popped them out of the office as the door blew open.

"DOBBY!" Harry yelled running to the elf.

"Missy James says find Harry Potter James's and says safe safe. Masters angry angry I is helping hers but when I says Missy says I'm best elf going to be free one day and work in school for kind masters, I beat my head and pulls my ears for it and he's very angries but Mistress says I needs finds Missy James rights aways and takes offs ones of her tops and says I must be a goods elf and gives me it and I's finds Missy James because I's free and she says finds Harry Potter James's!" The elf is vibrating in happiness. "Missy James says is time, yous needs to know she's with the book and is time and I'd rather be with Missy James than some school, can she be my nice mistresses now maybes?"

"Maybe Dobby." Harry sobbed pulling the elf in for a hug. "Just never ever punish yourself." He kissed the elf on his head. "She's really safe? She's ok?"

"Missy James's ok." Dobby beamed at him. "I's tell that's to Harry James and then I's have to tell Potter James, the rats a rat!"

"We know." Harry nodded, "You can go tell him again though and tell him he's a bastard, no remind that good for nothing dog Sirius it's his damn fault!"

"I's is saying." Dobby grinned and winked away.

Harry sat on him bum in the woods and cried. Hermione was ok. She was ok.

He gave himself only a moment for relief and then got up. The vault, she'd be going to the vault to get to the last one before he could move it. She'd destroy them all there. They had to kill him, now, it had to end now.

Harry stood up and gripped his wand tightly in his hand ready to charge in, the chess knight on his cuff catching his eye stopped him.

"You're right Ron." He muttered to himself, "We need a strategy first and fast. I'll need to tell the truth, to be the Master of Death again and I'll have to find a way to get to him, alone. No, we have to get the Death Eaters too, as many as possible, they can't be given another chance to take innocent lives." Harry sighed, "A battle, it would end in another battle, they'd lose some but he swore this would be the last, he'd stop Voldemort once and for all and then, then he'd find that rat.


	27. Chapter 27

"It was that." Severus whispered as he stopped her in front of Gringotts.

"What?"

"The necklace."

"What about it?" She lifted her hand to the pendant.

"He was dragging you out of the house and I was trying to fight, to break the curse and get to you. I saw your eyes." He shuddered, "They were dead. You weren't there." Severus looked away but shook himself, "He threw you on the grass and the thing was glowing, it glowed brighter and brighter and he backed away, freaked out. I was trying so hard to fight the curse and get to you." Severus gripped her hand, reminding himself she ok, they were safe. "He went to rip it off you but Voldemort stopped him, they took some of your hair and Bella put it in a potion and became you, dragged Greyback off with her somewhere and then I was hit with a spell and we woke up in the dungeon." Hermione lifted a hand to the necklace she hadn't taken off in three years. "What is it?" Severus asked quietly.

"Sirius gave it to me for Christmas at Hogwarts." She told him, fingering the pendant. "He knew I didn't sleep well from nightmares and said it was to keep me safe from them and to light my way in the dark.

"With love Kitten." His voice answered as he stepped out of Gingotts. She spun to him in shock, love can light the way through any dark because I will always keep you safe from nightmares."

"Sirius?"

He lifted his left wrist, on the leather cuff he always wore, knotted into the leather was a small gold circle she'd never noticed before. "I always knew when you woke from a nightmare and slipped down to the lake at dawn like magic, because it was magic love." Sirius told her. "I owe you an apology, a life time or two of them and Harry's right, I'll regret that day for all my life but I swear to you I _never_ betrayed you. I would never have told anyone where you were. I swear I didn't but you can still hate me for it, you can hate me and curse me but right now I think we have more pressing things to deal with no?"

"I wasn't having a nightmare." She contradicted, shaking her head

"You were living one." Sirius contradicted. "That kind of fear, of darkness in you." Sirius shook his head, "A dark spot inside of you like that can eat away at your soul, it can destroy you, I wouldn't ever let that happen to you Kitten. I made sure you were protected from it. I'll always protect you from it."

"How did you know I'd never take it off?" She asked fingering the necklace.

"I didn't but I'd never have let you out of my sight if you weren't wearing it."

"Not even that day?" She whispered.

Sirius sighed and shook his head, "Can we put how stupid I am and how sorry on pause because we aren't safe yet."

"Fine."

"Sev?" Sirius nodded to the other man. "You ok?"

"I'll live."

"Good." Sirius nodded, "After this is over we'll need you in the lab brewing rat poison, a lot of rat poison."

They walked into the bank and Hermione provided the key, "How'd you get this vault?" Sirius asked with a frown after she'd given the goblin the number vault she wanted to see.

"I'm superstitious." She told him with a smirk, "Harry and I paid the goblins well to have it."

"Superstitious." Severus repeated doubtfully.

"Very." She nodded.

The goblin led them down and backed away to give them privacy. "This is the easy part."

"It is?" Severus glared at the door.

"Sure." She winked and whispered "Magical banks aren't warded against muggle methods of criminal activity." At the answering frown of both men she grinned and opened the vault, inside was a small metal lockbox both men frowned at. She opened it and added the diary before closing it again and picking it up. She led them out of the vault and handed it to Griphook with a smirk, ironic it was _this_ goblin with them. "Please have this put in Bellatrix Lestrange's vault, it's very important. You'll find her magical signature is on the box."

"It is?" Sirius whispered.

"It is." Hermione nodded. Griphook tested the box and found nothing dark or nefarious and the box itself did have Bellatrix's magical signature. He nodded and turned to the vault.

"Please step away." He ordered.

"We'll wait in the cart." Hermione offered moving to get in, both men followed, perplexed.

Griphook did a series of movements with a clawed finger over the door and created a small goblin sized opening in the vault, slipping in through a crack and setting the box inside before slipping back out, he carefully locked and warded the fault before moving away from it.

"Goblins are a bit like purebloods." She said aloud. Griphook glared at her considering it an insult as he stepped closer to the cart. "The box is one Harry found, it's unimportant except that she once used it. He picked it up in a raid for dark artifacts Kingsley and Mad Eye took him on, trying to convince us to be Aurors still." She rolled her eyes at Sirius and James before smirking at Griphook again, stalling to be sure it worked, she needed to hear it or they'd have to make him break them inside and escape, like last time, please Merlin don't let it be like last time with the dragon. "Inside the artifacts aren't notable for being dark magic. Nothing is magically out of place." She shook her head, "No one would think to look for a muggle trap." She winked at Griphook as an explosion sounded in the vault and alarms began going off. "Fiendfyre alarm. We'd better get out of here." She smirked laughing, relieved the devise had set of the spark and broken the bottle of potion that once ignited became fiendfyre.

"You'll pay for this!" He huffed clambering into the cart. "That vault is protected, the fire won't get out!"

"Everything in it will be destroyed." Hermione laughed, "But we have nothing to get away with, we never entered that vault. _You_ were the last person to touch that box, _you _scanned it for trouble, _we _broke no laws or rules. I simply visited my vault and made a deposit to Bellatrix, which _you_ scanned and out into her vault."

Griphook muttered and cursed but had to let them leave the bank. Sirius was laughing and even Severus was smiling.

"You brilliant beautiful amazing witch!" Sirius shouted with mirth.

"Yes." Severus agreed, "Now why did we destroy the vault? Couldn't the book be destroyed alone?"

"There were five items." She explained, at his shocked expression she nodded, "Harry and I found three, actually two, Regulus got the third, you and I collected the fourth and the last was in that vault."

"Five items of what?" Sirius asked.

"Horcruxes." Severus explained. She'd told him about it as soon as they were safe and she'd given Dobby his instructions, while they'd hurried to get to the bank.

"Hor what?"

"She had to explain it to me too." Severus admitted.

Hermione shook her head and chuckled but explained, "He carved his soul up by murdering people?" Sirius demanded after she was done, "And he did it five times?"

"Yes and he planned to do it again but hasn't yet and now he can be killed and Harry has to do it." The fear in her was so clear them men could feel it. She met Sirius's eyes, "I've never not been with him, beside him. There was once, a moment in battle and he died, he came back but he died."

Sirius pulled her into his arms, "He won't die."

Hermione nodded into his chest but pulled back, "Harry's wonderful and brilliant but I'm the cautious one and Ron was the strategist, he's strong and an amazing wizard but he needs, we have to find him, I have to be with him."

Sirius nodded, "So this spell thing that bonded you, can you use it to find him?"

"What?" Hermione looked at him in shock and glanced at Severus but he looked as confused as she felt so she focused back on Sirius who shrugged.

"Harry told us. You did some spell that bonded you and you became twins." Sirius waved even as Severus was about to speak, "Details to be intensely questioned at a later date when we all have to time to be shocked and a little hurt we were lied to, right now, all that's important is if it can help us find Harry the way this," He held up his cuff, "Helped me find you."

"Maybe." She licked her lips and nodded, "We can feel each other sometimes, read each other, we share nightmares and sometimes, we just, know things but it's not like we can read each others minds!" She threw up her hands.

"Maybe you can." Severus interrupted.

"Yeah, right." She huffed, "We have this amazing magical connection into each others minds that we never noticed before.

"You did notice it." Severus growled, "For someone so smart you can be incredibly stupid." At her expression, mouth opening to retort he glared, "You even asked me to do it a few hours ago."

Hermione frowned in thought, "I'm not a Legilmens, neither is Harry, before this spell he was awful at Occlumency."

"The spell built walls in your heads and it built a bridge between you." Severus frowned as he thought, "You share dreams Mya, it's a Legilmens bond, you know things about each other because you're connected, because you are sharing that bond."

"I can't read his mind." She insisted.

"Legilemency isn't reading someones mind." He snapped, "It's much more powerful and intricate."

"It's also a magic that has to be cultivated and taught with years of training, I can't do it."

"Maybe not, not with Sirius or me but the magic created a bond, a link specific to his head, all you have to do is follow it." Severus insisted, "I can help you."

Hermione bit her lip and nodded, "Coming?" Severus asked Sirius who just nodded. Severus took both of their hands and apparated them back to Spinner's End. Damage to the library and front hall aside, the place was still in better condition than when he'd moved into it after Hogwarts, before Mya had moved him into her Marauder family.

Shaking off the thoughts Severus settled them at the kitchen table and pulled out his borrowed wand, "This thing doesn't want to answer to me but I'll try, any boost might help me get past your walls, we already know I can't do it wandlessly."

"Where's your wand?" Sirius demanded.

Severus glared at him, "There were thirteen Death Eaters here and while I would have died continuing to fight, Voldemort was to powerful, they were able to subdue me and take it."

Sirius nodded and pulled out his wand, "Use mine, if we're asking instead of forcing it, maybe it will allow you to bond."

Severus stared at the man a moment before slowly nodding, a wand was a very intimate object, the bond between the wizard and his wand was strong and personal.

He took the wand and gave the moment it's due respect before focusing on Hermione, Sirius rested a hand on his arm, hoping to instill his own bond with the wand into the wizard and turned his attention on the witch he loved with all of his soul.

"Legilmens." Severus pushed into her mind, carefully nudging against her walls, trying to move past or around them.

In the back of his mind he could hear Sirius talking to her, prompting her "Try to think about Harry, to feel him."

There. Severus jerked at the flicker of an image, the boy was much younger and he was laughing, they were in a very cluttered sitting room with a red-haired boy. The image disappeared and he couldn't trace it, couldn't follow it anywhere or connect with anything else. Come on. He silently urged, hearing Sirius urging her aloud again. When the image came it was cloudy and unclear, like a dream.

Severus wanted to pull back, to scrub the image from his mind. He was seeing the memory from two perspectives simultaneously, the red-headed boy was older sixteen or seventeen, Harry and Mya were trying to reach him but he looked at them, his expression glazed and empty, with fear in his eyes, as he fought his own actions, he lifted his wand and with the cutting curse, slit his own throat. The memory shifted and Severus jolted as an image he thought could be himself and then Sirius, Remus, more red-heads, a boy that sort of looked like Frank Longbottom but didn't, then a blonde boy who looked a bit like Lucius, like Narcissa and others so many others some he seemed to almost recognize, relations to people he knew, others were older versions of people he did know. He'd see their face and a flash of a memory with it. He wasn't sure who the memories belonged to as the faces of people flipped through their shared nightmare, then it was graves, so many graves and they stood with linked hands over two fresh ones, none of the graves were old though, mounds of earth that hadn't yet had the chance for the grass to re-grow. He tried to follow one thread in her mind to another without looking to hard into the privacy of her mind but he couldn't go anywhere in her mind but along the threads connected in her nightmare until finally he knew he was in a memory that belonged only to Harry. It had come to her, become her nightmare, through him. Severus knew because in it the small curled up form of Mya was in uncomfortable looking chair in a dark and dusty library. Harry pulled her hand gently in his and Severus could see the anguish and tears, that flowed down his cheeks. He whispered to the empty room. "I should have stayed dead."

"Left me too?" The tiny form of Hermione on the chair whispered back. His hand taking hers had woken her, not with a start or jolt, her eyes just flicked open, not looking to him or around, they just fluttered open and Severus wanted to cry at the deadness he saw in them.

"Never." Harry whispered back.

"I wish I'd died. I wish Draco had let Greyback kill me."

"I wouldn't have made it through without you."

"Through to what?"

"Defeating him."

"If you'd really died that day, you wouldn't have."

"I didn't die."

"He did." She agreed.

"What difference does it make now?" Harry snorted.

"I don't know." She whispered back, tears flowing down his eyes.

"We should have died, we all should have died."

"No." She frowned into the ash of the fireplace, "None of _them_ should have."

"My?"

She sat up and turned to him, "What would you risk to _try_ to save them all?"

"Everything."

Green eyes met chocolate and a flicker of life just barely sparked in the depths. This wasn't the shared nightmare at all; this was a different memory, Harry's memory. Severus pushed with all of his magical ability and found a tiny thread into the other man's mind, just a fraction of a second before jerking back to himself with a jolt. It had taken only a moment, less than sixty seconds to view all of the images, to share the memory before he'd flung back out of Harry's mind, out of Mya's, knocked back in his chair.

Mya blinked at him and their eyes met, "I know where that is." She told him. Severus nodded and got up.

"Well?" Sirius demanded.

"Harry's waiting for us." She told him.

"Where?"

"He's gone home." She took in a steadying breath, "12 Grimmauld Place."

Sirius frowned at her and opened his mouth, not sure what to say he shut it again and then tried again, opening his mouth, "That's_ my_ house, as in the Black family home."

"Yes." Hermione nodded, "I know." Turning around she walked out of the kitchen. Still frowning and confused Sirius followed behind her and Severus. "Get the others and meet us there." She told Sirius, "And bring James's invisibility cloak." She told him grabbing Severus's arm and apparating with him to the front stoop.


	28. Chapter 28

Harry grinned as he opened the door and yanked her against him hugging her tightly, "Thank Merlin."

She hugged him back just as tightly but they pulled apart as Severus pushed them into the hall.

Hermione frowned up the steps, "She's not there yet." Hermione smiled at the hideous pastoral painting in the hall.

Harry rolled his eyes, "The real thing is worse, trust me."

"Where is she?" Hermione asked looking around with a frown.

Harry avoided looking at her and Hermione laughed, it felt good to laugh, "Tell me."

"I bound and gagged her and then wrapped her in a comforter, a red and gold Griffindor one from Sirius's room."

Hermione laughed and shook her head at him. "Did it make you feel better?"

"A little." He shrugged, "You _were_ taking a while."

Hermione rolled her eyes, "Let's make tea, Sirius is bringing everyone."

"Bet he loved that." Harry snorted.

"Yeah." She nodded in agreement leading the way.

Severus watched as they made tea and then frowned at her, "You apparated us wandlessly." He told her as she flicked her wrist at the correct cupboard to make mugs float out without having to search for them, the spell wandless and wordless.

"Mya's brilliant." Harry shrugged, "I can only do small stuff wandless." He glared at them but frowned as they avoided one part of the floor, using magic to get something or going the long way around the table. They also avoided looking down, frowning he looked around and down at the spot, one of the flashes from their nightmare surfaced in his memory.

"She died here." He whispered. "The red-head."

"Ginny." Harry confirmed not looking at him, "She killed herself."

"Not this time." Hermione took his hand and squeezed it, "Come on, let's all gather in the library."

She led the way up as though she'd been to the house a thousand times and inside he knew why, this was the dark library, it was clean and free of dust, the windows without a spot of grime and the fireplace stacked with fresh wood but it was undoubtedly the same library.

Sirius arrived with the others, all confused, only moments later.

"Where's my mother?" Sirius asked dropping onto a couch in the house he'd sworn never to set foot in again.

"Tied up." Harry smirked making Hermione snort though she was able to hold back the laugh.

"You two are a bit dark." Andromeda told them with a slight frown.

"Yeah," Sirius nodded, "But we're ones to talk eh Andy."

"Sirius." She nodded fighting a smile. "How are you cousin?"

"Eh, fighting the good fight, defying everything the family stands for."

She laughed and shook her head, "I'm sorry I haven't seen you at the order meetings."

"Didn't know you'd joined till now."

"Ted passed." She told him, smile falling, "Death Eater attack. I wont let our daughter grow up in a world like that."

"What's her name?"

"Nymphadora."

"Interesting as this _meeting_ is." A voice drawled, "Perhaps we can get on with it."

"Lucius." Mad Eye glared at the blonde wizard. The man gave him an arrogant half nod in return.

"Narcissa?" Hermione asked.

Lucius lifted a brow at her, "You've had a remarkable affect on my wife. So much so that I've been informed I will defy the Dark Lord and help you or she will take my son and move to that bloody uncouth dastardly America and raise him there where he will never know he is a Malfoy."

"Good for her."

"Betraying him leads to very short life spans, the former owner of this house might attest to it but he and his fool son are dead." The blond glanced around the room, "Where's Walburga?"

"Tied up." Harry offered with a grin.

"I see every one's gathered." Dumbledore entered and smiled at them, as though they were meeting for tea, "What a delightfully surprising location to meet Mr. James."

Harry glared at him, "What scheme do you have up your sleeve?"

Lucius smirked, McGonagall gasped and Dumbledore chuckled. "It was you who brought us I believe Mr. Potter."

"Me?" James frowned, "I followed Sirius, he brought us all."

Harry snorted and shook his head, "How long since you figured it out?"

"Ah." Dumbledore nodded with a wide grin, "Not so long as I'd like to claim, no. Even I have my limits to uncovering hidden truths. I had suspicions of course, after seeing you, so like him and yet I never would have imagined."

"Imagined what exactly?" Minchum, the Minister for Magic demanded.

"The truth minister." Dumbledore twinkled, seemingly quite amused with the situation, "About our young friends." He motioned to Hermione and Harry.

"The twins?" Kingsley frowned at them.

"Not I believe twins."

"We're bonded twins." Hermione contradicted.

"Perhaps," He nodded to her, "But not born that way."

"No." Harry rolled his eyes, "Like I said before, she's muggleborn, it was a spell… _that's_ when you figured it out?" Harry stared at him open mouthed, "We've been here three years, we went to your school!"

"Yes." Dumbeldore nodded, "You are both very powerful and highly intelligent, unlike myself at such a young age, I do believe that the two of you will be able to do great and wonderful things in a position to wield that power one day. Even now, I would not trust myself with to much power, you two though" He smiled at them, "This kind of magic takes a special kind of person, one with purest hearts, shattered by pain and battered by darkness but still strong and filled with light. Perhaps time and error have given me a greater wisdom but I fear I would still not be as capable a leader."

"Well we wouldn't use some of your tactics." Harry snorted and then shook himself before meeting his eyes, "I'm sorry, I was just always so in awe of you and I've missed you so much, I trusted you, blindly and that was my fault. I don't have the right to be so upset you aren't perfect."

"Thank you." Dumbledore nodded, "I can't speak for myself of course but I feel sure I would have regretted disappointing you so highly, whatever mistakes I made must have been highly grievous."

"They cost a lot of young lives." Hermione told him regretfully. "We couldn't afford to trust you with the power knowing about us would give you."

"I understand completely." He smiled at them, "Power corrupts many, whether it is in seeking it or wielding it thus it is best I run my school and leave it to stronger, more worthy and balanced hearts."

"Somebody explain." Mad Eye grumbled.

"Mr. Potter?" Dumbledore smiled again.

"What?" James asked confused.

Harry turned slightly to face Lily and James, taking a deep breath he exhaled, "I'm your son."

Lily's hand went to her barely there bump and James frowned at him utterly astounded.

"Not the one you're carrying." Hermione offered gently, "If that is a boy, it won't be Harry, he can't be born again, he already exists."

"Are you our daughter?" Lily whispered.

Hermione shook her head, "Harry and I aren't related remember? We created a bond through magic, it's called a twin bond and any spell to find out who we are would show us as being twins because of it, but we're closer than that, we're completely bonded, for all our lives and into whatever comes next."

"We live and die together." Harry added taking her hand.

Lily nodded slowly and James stood frowning at them, "You're my son?"

"Harry James Potter, born July 31, 1980." Harry offered them a tentative smile and glanced to Sirius, "Godson to Sirius Black who left me this house."

"Left you?" Remus asked.

"There are three people in this room, in this house, still alive in our time." Hermione confirmed her eyes immediately turning away to look at the ground, "Harry and I are two of them."

"You travelled back in time?" Minchum frowned, "That far? Can you do that? Is it legal? How?"

"Meddling with time is very dangerous." McGonagall admonished them.

"We didn't travel back in time." Harry corrected, "We looped it."

"Restarted the future on a new path." Hermione explained.

"Something that can only be done by very strong magic in very dark times by very special hearts." Dumbledore added.

"Sometimes surviving, winning a war, isn't enough." Hermione told them, lifting her chin in defiance.

"Not if you can stop it." Harry added firmly.

"There is no future, not for anyone here and not for most of your children, who die, horribly or will be left broken and scarred for life if we didn't do anything."

"In the end, seventy nine percent of the wizarding world was decimated." Harry told them, "That was the conservative estimate."

"We came back to fix it, to change it."

"Or die trying."

They were met with silence until Dumbledore cleared his throat, "So, now I believe the end you hoped for has come and we're here not to discuss this marvelous twist but to do something?"

"Hermione and I were able to collect all of Voldemort's horcruxes, with a little help along the way, and now she's destroyed them, which means he can be killed again." He turned to Dumbeldore, "I think you'll find, that answers to me." He nodded to the wizards wand, "And I'll need it back." With the flick of his own wand he summoned it and the two Elder wands became one. He pulled the snitch he always played with out of his pocket and turned to James. "I'll also need the cloak." James frowned at him but nodded throat to dry and in to much shock to answer.

"I have it." Remus handed over the bag he held and Harry pulled the cloak out before turning to Hermione.

"Master of Death." She forced a smile at him. "Don't die this time."

"There are worse things than death." He reminded her.

"I know." She agreed, "We lived them."

"We've lived some pretty great things to." He nodded to the people around them, tears in his eyes as he absently played with the chess piece on the leather cuff at his wrist.

Hermione just nodded struggling not to cry. "I love you Harry."

"I'll see you after… whatever happens, I'll see you after."

Hermione licked her lips and nodded before they turned to Lucius.

"My wand?"

Lucius nodded and handed it to her before trading Severus for his own. "Get Narcissa and Draco to the Burrow, they'll be safe there." She turned to Andromeda, "Nymphadora too."

Then she looked to Frank but he was already nodding, "I'll send my Patronis to Alice now, she and Neville are with my mother."

"What you said to Narcissa, that he kills our son?" Lucius asked.

"He kills both of them." She confirms with a nod, "He was brave and good, in the end, he was a man you should be proud of but a broken one and he died because of that monster."

"Then I'm with you."

"I'm a mudblood, you know."

"A powerful witch." He nodded, "However… impure your blood."

"Dirty." She challenged. He nodded in acknowledgement. "I can't change who you are Lucius but the man you became, wrapped in all that hate." She made sure she was looking in his eyes, "Your son was the one to send him to hell." Shock passes over his features for a moment but Hermione is already turning away.

Harry is smirking at the man, "It was a Killing Curse too, he came to hate you that much." Then he turns away and grabs Hermione's hand, just for a moment, he meets her eyes as they share each other's strength and bravery and comfort. "Give me the day, I'll find a way close to him, once the battle begins tonight, I'll face him."

Hermione nods, "I'll see you after."

"Whatever happens." Harry told her with a grim smile before he flicked the hood of the cloak over his head, disappearing from view. Though he'd held all three Hallows, he'd never had all three simultaneously until now and he hoped it was enough to be the saviour he'd always been labeled.

Hermione closed her eyes for a second and breathed in before facing the rest again, "Harry's going to fight him, but we need to take care of the Death Eaters, the battle will bad, on their turf, it will be bloody and many of us will die, it's been an honor to fight with you and your children." She told them.


	29. Chapter 29

Arrangements were organized and plans made quickly, Hermione had slept some, curled on the bed in the room that had once, in future past, been hers. They all took turns getting some sleep as they planned and plotted and made sure their loved ones were safe. Finally they met to review the plan. Entering the room Hermione moved over and hugged Molly, pulling back she smiled at the witch "Stay safe, don't do anything to reckless or Gryffindor, your family needs you more than you can imagine, they'll fall apart without you." She turned to look at all of them, "Be careful, never let your guards down, be prepared for anything to come at you, not just Death Eaters but giants, inferati, werewolves and others. He has allies in all those the wizarding world has subjugated and marginalized and there's a lot of them."

She waited for a few nods and turned to the pinkish sky closing her eyes, "It's time. Harry's in place now. We attack hard and fast." She told them opening her eyes; she turned and nodded, "Now." Then she disapparated.

There was a moment, less than a second where the appearance of witches and wizards popping in their midst stunned the Death Eaters, but only for a second. Luckily Lucius, standing with the Death Eaters in mask and cloak, was just was quick and began aiming at the other masked men. Screams and spells filled the air, Hermione had shut off, there was nothing but instinct and battle, no thought except for a small corner of her mind where she felt Harry, saw him. He was facing off against an arrogant Voldemort, whose main concern was for Dumbledore, fighting off a giant and two Death Eaters. That would be his deadly mistake. Underestimating Harry. She fought through to get to his side but was grabbed by Greyback.

"We never finished." He licked the side of her face and she screamed, in rage and fear. This time his voice, his hands on her didn't make her freeze, they filled her with the darkness but a violent darkness, the kind spells like the Crutiatous are born from. She spun on him and fought back but he was able to trip her as she spun and landed hard on top of her. She fought with tooth and nail and wandless curses as he pulled back and hit her, he only grazed the side of her face with his punch, his aim thrown off as a large black dog jumped on his back. Hermione tried to take a calming breath and was able to transform into her cat form and get away, transforming back she hit the werewolf with a vicious cutting hex as he advanced on Sirius. Almost in the same instant her spell hit, another curse tore into the werewolf, opening each cut wider so blood poured out. It was a spell she'd witnessed only once before, Sectumspempra, glancing around she saw Severus and spared him a half smile in appreciation, even as she ducked a curse from another Death Eater.

Sirius clapped Severus on the back with a grin, "Teach me that one day yeah, for the next war." he winked and spun away, pushing the wizard out of the path of a giant's weapon and firing another curse at a nearby Death Eater.

Severus rejoined the fight taking out a vial and sending it flying up before igniting the fireworks aimed to blind the giant.

"Brilliant!" James called dropping to the ground from his broom, "Anything for this?" He asked lifting his shirt a little.

Severus paled at the wound, "Do not die." He ordered the man.

James forced a smile, "Will you take care of Lily and our baby if I do?"

"Take care of them yourself you lazy ingrate." Severus hissed, "You won her, now you have to take care of her." He had helped James to the ground and was trying to heal the wound. Finally he took a potion from his robes, "Take this and get the hell out of here."

James took the potion and shook his head, "I can't."

"Don't be stupid." Severus growled.

"He's my son." James met his eyes, "He's been one of my best friends for three years but he's my son. I won't leave this battle while he's still in it."

Severus nodded and pulled another potion from his robes, "Take this then."

James nodded and downed the foul tasting potion. "Am I going to die?"

"Not from that wound and if we're lucky you won't become a werewolf but we won't know until the full moon."

"Thanks Sev."

"Be more careful." Severus ordered the man.

"You too." James nodded letting him help him up he swung back onto his broom and flew up through the trees.

Severus turned out of the small grouping of trees to rejoin the battle sending up a quick prayer to Merlin for his friends.

The battle began to die down and Severus stopped attacking and started trying to help the wounded. In the ruble he found Remus and poured potions down his throat, begging out loud, "Please be ok you stupid wolf."

He looked up and around for anyone to help and saw Peter, wand aimed at Sirius's back. "SIRIUS!" He shouted. The wizard spun and Severus couldn't tell if the Killing Curse had hit him. "Don't be dead." He prayed, "Merlin don't let him be dead, don't let any of my brothers be dead." His mind jumped to Hermione and fear filled every pore in his body. He grabbed Remus up and apparated them to where he knew Healers were set up. He called for help but the harried group ignored him so he grabbed one of the aproned mediwitches, "He needs a surgeon, now!"

"We'll get to him." She looked Remus over and made a mark on his forehead before turning away.

"What is that?" He grabbed her.

"A symbol, the Healers will see it and get to him."

"He needs help now."

"He's a werewolf" she spat, "he's badly injured maybe to bad to survive, he needs to much help, it'll take to much time and we need it to help others."

Severus grabbed the girl up holding her a millimeter from his face, "You get a Healer and you get him into surgery and you save his life or I'll provide you with the same injuries and leave you out in the woods to die. Understand?" She gulped and nodded so he shoved her away. "Do not die." He ordered the werewolf rubbing the mark off his forehead he dumped a last potion down his throat as a Healer came up and began to cast spells. Severus apparated back to the battle and tried to find Sirius or Mya or any other the people he had come to love.

A scream turned his blood cold and he went running, only a sliver of relief flowing through his veins as he saw Sirius and James running in the same direction a moment later, the scream had belonged to Hermione.

The battle, which had been dying down, seemed to be renewed or maybe it had just moved, the men all fought, kept fighting, above the yells, curses and cries their ears still rang with her scream.

Harry faced off against the Dark Wizard, who had finally recognized the true threat in him. It was to late though, Harry had the upper hand and the wizard would die for his crimes. Lifting his wand Harry built up the hatred and anger needed to cast the unforgivable, thinking of all the people from his time, all their pain and suffering, all of their death.

Hermione stumbled as she ran and then screamed, hatred filled her at the sight of the dark wizard, as she saw him through Harry's eyes and then she every face of the people she loved flooding her mind with the moment of their death or an image of their suffering.

Her scream brought Harry out of the darkness, unable to complete the casting of the spell. Immediately he through up a shield and narrowly missed the a violent spell from the dark wizard. His worry for Hermione should have distracted him but instead her scream had filled him with light, she was still alive, still there with him. With that knowledge came the faces of the people he came to love now and all the hope for the future they'd built over the last three years. Filled with love he faced off the wizard again and smiled.

"Something amusing little wizard?" Voldemort demanded, looking for his opening.

"I feel sorry for you." Harry told him. "That you have never and will never know what it means."

"What?"

"Life, Death, Love." Harry smiled again, "Hope."

The wizard shook his head and shot another spell, two hoping the first, a killing curse would distract him enough to get the disarming spell through his defenses.

It didn't and Harry just smiled at him again. The look was something Voldemort couldn't explain or understand, it unnerved him and made him angry but that only seemed to amuse Harry more.

Hermione appeared and moved to his side, taking his hand in hers they faced off against the wizard.

"It's over Riddle." She told him, shaking her head, "You lost."

"No!" He growled but fear was coiling in his gut, a feeling Voldemort hadn't felt in decades if ever. He was tired, they'd been dueling for hours and fighting off others who got to close, protecting themselves against spells, curses and hexes flying around them. She had been in the main battle, they should both be as tired as he was, but they weren't, they seemed calm and peaceful and strong, as though they were sharing strength between them.

"You shouldn't be afraid of death." Hermione told him gently.

"There are worse things than death." Harry explained.

"Then die!" Voldemort hissed throwing the last of his strength into the spell. Harry and Hermione cast a disarming and binding spell in the same instant and the force of their magic blended, the force of love behind it as it collided with the death curse sent towards them.

As Severus, Sirius and James ran, blocking attacks and fighting to get to where they were sure their two friends were, a small explosion rocked the area and skirmishes paused a moment before resuming. Word spread that Voldemort was dead and Death Eaters retreated. Battles continued only a few minutes longer before it was all over.

Injured were found and brought to Healers and, the bodies of the dead gathered. Two hours. It had been a bloody massacre lasting a little over two hours but it had felt like days.

In the chaos everyone was searching for loved ones, the Order of the Phoenix searching for the 'twins' the saviors and the body of the Dark Wizard. By five am it was confirmed none of the three were amongst the dead, nor had they been brought to a hospital for treatment.

Remus was alive but still badly injured. James, aside from the healing werewolf wound to his side, had a cut dissecting his left eye and a concussion. Sirius had a deep cut over his hip, broken ribs, a dislocated shoulder, a shard of wood in his upper thigh and internal injuries. Severus had burns on his right side, his entire back was a mess of boils and lacerations and his arm was broken, the bone snapped and pushing out his skin.

All fought getting treatment to help in the search for the missing two of their group. Lily was at the hospital, unable to join the battle while pregnant she was helping to heal who she could. As soon as she saw the three men she put her foot down, forcing them to be treated but once they were deemed not critical in anyway and as healed as they could be without time and rest, she immediately kissed them all and sent them back to the search, turning back to other patients badly needing attention.

"Can you use that cuff thing" Severus pushed Sirius.

"I'm trying." Sirius nods but they couldn't seem to find the twins amongst the bodies of the dead and injured, not them or Voldemort, all three seemed to have vanished.


	30. Chapter 30

In the end it was Harry and Hermione to find them.

The dawn rose up over the stone circle, waking the two who shivered in the cold and reached out, taking each others hands as they blinked awake. Standing they faced a shadow against one of the stones, "Masters of Death and Life." The shadow spoke, at their uncertainty he chuckled, or was it a she? Neither could tell. "Walk through the curtain and find peace and rest, together. You're free now." It spoke again, "Or walk out to meet the new day and live, in chaos, happiness and sorrow, love and hate, hope and pain." It wasn't a shadow of a person, it was a veil, floating in the arch way of stone, the voice, one of many, from its depths.

Harry squeezed her hand and reached down to lift the cloak from the grass they'd stood from. He handed it to her and together they said goodbye. Hearts aching with memories shared under that cloak, with their red-haired friend, they tossed it into the veil. Harry flicked the wand in after and then pulled the snitch from his pocket so it could join the other Hallows.

Hermione ran a hand on the runes along the stone edge of the veil, a last goodbye to the past future and the people they'd loved and lost there. Saying goodbye to the pain and darkness, letting go her heart finally healed. She turned with Harry, knowing his heart was finally whole as well, she took his hand and walked out of the stone circle towards the dawn and whatever the future would bring. There were worse things than death, they knew, they'd lived them but for all the bad life brought for all the horror and pain there was so much good, laughter, love and hope. Peace was tempting but hope glowed in their hearts telling them, it wasn't time yet.

Once they'd passed it's stones they turned one last time but the veil was gone, leaving only a weather battered stone like all the others in the circle. Smiling to each other they hugged, spinning on the spot and apparating back to the chaos, sorrow and joy, to the pain and love and every hope in the future.

In the hours that followed they found themselves back in the library of Grimmauld Place, explaining what had happened and that yes, Voldemorte was dead, forever dead. Then they had to explain about the time loop, this took them to the Wizengamot and hours of explanations, a process more exhausting than the NEWTs and in the end they were detained for almost three days while it was all sorted out. Of course while theses explanations and investigations too place the duo had to face the music about being unregistered animagi, charges they and the rest of the marauders were thankfully forgiven as well, so long as all of them properly registered then and there.

Harry and Hermione didn't mind being detained in the ministry and agreed to stay longer to help with the trials against Death Eaters. The world was going crazy over them as the saviours, which was only increased by the information of them looping time to save all future generations and both wanted to avoid the worst of it for a couple days.

Exhausted, the group were finally able to return to the home they'd shared, a eight days after the battle. There was still a lot for them all to talk about. During the trials Hermione and Harry learned that Severus had threatened a mediwitch to get Remus medical care but the charges were dropped with the animagus charges since he was a big war hero. James had killed Peter after he'd nearly killed Sirius, haing only missed because Severus had called out a warning to Sirius whose back had been to his former friend at the time. Remus had killed Bellatrix, which is how he'd ended up with his wounds. Lucius would always walk with a limp and had a scar on his neck from nearly losing his head but he had survived, and saved many lives. They put together all the pieces of the night and mourned the ones they'd lost, including Frank Longbottom and Andromeda Tonks.

In the days that followed their return home, things finally settled down and the friends, the family, sat around their sitting room, rested and healed. "So," James smiled at Harry, "son." He grinned and shook his head, "How old were you when you came back?"

"Eighteen." Harry supplied.

"Eighteen in July and I didn't turn eighteen until March so you're twenty one now?"

"Yeah." Harry nodded.

"I'm twenty for six more months and my son is twenty-one." He laughed, "Lily our son is older than us."

Lily shook her head fighting back a smile and focused on Harry, "Were we good parents?"

Remus frowned as he remembered a long ago conversation with Hermione, "They weren't were they."

"Hey!" James protested, thinking his friend was joking but a little thrown by the expression on his face.

"They died." Harry confirmed for Remus, "Next month, on October 31."

"How?" Lily asked taking her husband's hand in hers.

"There was a prophesy about a child born that July, two of us fit, Neville and I, but he decided it was about me."

"They went into hiding but someone betrayed them to Voldemort." Remus nodded, thinking out loud.

"They killed dad first. Mum was in my nursery and wouldn't let him take me. He killed her and turned his wand on me."

"Harry was the only person to every survive the killing curse, because of your love Lily." Hermione offered gently, hoping to comfort the witch what little she could.

"That's when I got this." Harry rubbed the old scar. He glossed over the next eleven years but he knew they got the picture.

"So I went to Hogwarts and was sorted into Gryffindor with the two people who would become my family." Harry beamed. Lily seemed furious with her sister but Harry reminded her, she couldn't be angry with Pentunia for something that never happened, not in this time and with Lily alive and well, perhaps the sisters could build a relationship, even if they didn't, the past wasn't important, not anymore, especially the one that never happened.

"Why didn't you live with Sirius?" She demanded, had he died too? Why else wouldn't he have raised their son for them? Him and Remus together.

"Everyone thought he betrayed you, that he killed a lot of people."

"It was Peter wasn't it?" James demanded, "That's why neither of you ever liked him."

They both nodded in confirmation, "We wanted to give him a chance, to maybe save him." Hermione tried to explain, "So many were forced to do things, to join him."

"You never believed he was one though." Remus persisted.

"I wanted to."

"What he did, to you, to Sirius." Harry shook his hand curling it in anger, "Then he helped bring Voldemort back."

"Tell us about it." Lily asked gently, "Tell us everything that happened."

"It all started at Hogwarts." Harry began…

By the end, with them walking into the veil to come back, shock, awe and pain etched across every face. Hermione and Harry held hands, knuckles white and tears flowing but it was easier this time, remembering, it was easier now and with this telling, sharing their true selves with their family, they had said goodbye to it all at the veil and were able to really let it go, now it was just a painful bittersweet memory dulled like an old dream, a nightmare they'd never have to have again.

Over the course of the following weeks, Molly having been present in the Wizengamot and learned about her relationship with the twins prior to the loop, invited them to Sunday dinner and introduced the war heroes to her flabbergasted and awed children. Harry and Hermione couldn't help but laugh and when they asked for hugs all five complied. When Molly put baby Ron, in their arms both cried a little over their best friend.

"He'll be amazing at chess." Harry told Molly.

"A brilliant strategist." Hermione agreed.

"All of them will do well." Harry smiled at her, "Maybe not in careers you'll want for them but in things they love and will thrive in."

"You'll be very proud of them, all of them." Hermione repeated, "Try not to be to hard on the twins, they need to be kept in check but they're truly brilliant and crazy as it might sound, what they choose to do, it makes a difference in people lives, makes them happy and that's so important."

"Try to let Ron know he's special." Harry added, "He can feel a little down on himself having so many older brothers, all so brilliant and talented who have already done everything."

"You talk like you wont see them." She admonished, "The way I heard it, in that review of the Wizengamot, you both were our family too. So you'll be here to see them grow up. So no more of that nonsense now and let's eat. You are both to skinny but a few proper Sunday dinners here at home and we'll have you healthy and strong again."

The next dinner invitation extended was from the Malfoy's and the duo went, albeit a little apprehensively. To both of their shoch, Narcissa had adopted her eight-year-old half-blood niece and Nymphadora was there changing her appearance to make baby Draco laugh. Narcissa explained that though she'd never be able to repair the breach between them, she hoped to make it up to her late sister by adopting her orphan and would do her best to raise the child how her sister would have wanted.

"We're searching for a nanny." Lucius confided taking the little girls hand as they walked into the dining room, he had to lean heavily on his cane with his other hand as the little girl tripped over nothing, hanging onto him so not to fall and tugging him along as soon as she found her feet again.

"Not because I wont do it myself." Narcissa jumped in, "I am, even with Draco only a few months its not to much for me, but only because we're pure-blood and she isn't."

"You know she isn't a different species right?" Hermione tried bite her tongue and wait for an explanation, fighting the twitch her fingers wanted to make to her wand.

Harry laughed and shook his head in glee, "I honestly cannot wait to meet this Draco, I bet I would have been great friends with him."

"Harry?" Hermione asked amused and a bit startled at his amusement.

"They want a muggle-born or half-blood nanny to help them expose her to the muggle world." He chuckled.

"It's what my sister would have wanted." Narcissa confirmed.

"Yeah." Harry nodded, it is. He grinned at her, "I think it will be great for all of you."

Lucius rolled his eyes, "My son is still a pure blood and will be raised proud of that."

"I'd never doubt it." Harry grinned at him, unable to contain it. "Don't worry," Harry laughed, "He'll probably still be a Slytherin git."

"Of course he will." Lucius gasped, appalled at the suggestion his son would be in a different house, making them all laugh.

"Just a word to the wise," Hermione told Narcissa as they prepared to leave later that evening, "She's going to be a bit of a clutz all her life." She chuckled as, again hanging onto Lucius's hand, she tripped, holding herself up by him and not letting the event slow her momentum as she pulled him away to tuck her in. "She's a brilliant witch but I hope you aren't to attached to any of these antiques."

Narcissa laughed and nodded, "I had gotten the impression anything particularly special should be put away, both for her somewhat less than graceful inclinations as well as for once Draco begins to walk. Really though, very little can't be replaced besides them. Thank you though for the warning. I don't suppose there is anything else about her you might be able to warn us on in advance? An allergy or illness she contracted in that other loop?"

"Nothing." Hermione shook her head with a smile, "Don't worry Narcissa, you're an amazing mother and you'll do just fine, with both of them."

"Thank you." The witch gave Hermione another shock as she reached over and hugged first her and then Harry before handing them the container of floo powder.


	31. Chapter 31

Eventually everything returned to as close to normal as it ever could.

Harry and Hermione had finally agreed to officially become Aurors along with James at the encouragement of Lily. Sirius had been in training already so the four of them were rushed through the process and testing as a formality but mostly had been cleared for field work with an experienced Auror as their partner. Hermione had stayed with Kingsley, Harry with Mad Eye, Sirius with Savage and James with Proudfoot. Generally the teams worked together so Harry and Hermione were almost always together, as were James and Sirius, though that had initially been a concern, the two boys worked well together, knowing when they needed to be focused and serious and when pranks, joking and teasing were ok. Mostly only units of four were needed for missions though so they saw each other in the office, when both units happened to be between missions. Luckily on the rare occasions both units were out at once, Remus was at home with Lily, who'd started to grow quite round . Being a war hero he was able to reach an agreement with a publisher and worked from home, writing papers and future textbooks while Lily took to studying medi-witch.

James, had a new affinity for red meat and extreme restlessness and moodiness around the full moon, did not transform into a werewolf and though relieved he also slapped Remus on the back and laughed, "Ah well, so much for that adventure, at least I'll still be Prongs out there with you."

"What do you call a carnivorous deer?" Sirius teased with a laugh.

"A dog with an amazing rack." Severus offered up in complete deadpan making them all crack up laughing.

"You need to become an animagus Sev!" James shouted at the man.

"I am not becoming part of your disturbing club."

"To late." Lily teased with a laugh.

"Yeah Sev, you're stuck with us." Hermione told him, curling up onto the sofa and resting her head on his shoulder.

"You and Lily, this lot are just an unfortunate by product of our friendship."

"Yes, that must be why you were here all day while Mya and I were baby shopping." Lily laughed, teasing him as she took a seat in the round red armchair and rubbed the small bump that seemed to grow a little more each day. Despite the fact that the Marauders had asked and Lily had pouted and demanded, Severus had resumed living at Spinners End. To his, and their surprise, so had Hermione though the pair were over almost daily.

Severus rolled his eyes and shifted, kissing Hermione's temple and wrapping an arm around her, letting her snuggle into his side.

Sirius left the room and James shook his head after his friend before following him.

Remus sighed and sank down into the other red chair. "What now?" Harry asked him, half teasing, "If it's the zombie apocalypse, I'm busy."

Remus smirked at his friend shaking his head; "Tell me the name of my wife in your time."

"No way." Harry shook his head, "No details, we don't want to influence your life."

"If you end up together you were meant to be, just like Lily and James." Hermione agreed immediately, "It's better you aren't influenced by the people you might have become but haven't."

"There was a point we thought getting her to forgive Sev would get them together instead of my parents." Harry told him, "We'd have let that happen if that's how things went. But I guess they were meant to fall in love all along."

Remus made a face and sat back, then looked at Hermione, "Is she why you left me?"

"No." Hermione answered gently, wanting to be honest but not to hurt him again.

Remus nodded, "Is Severus?"

"Sev?" She frowned at him.

Remus nodded from her to the wizard she was curled against.

"As much as I love her, we both know she's meant for someone else." Severus answered for her.

"You do?" Hermione asked sitting up to see him better but quickly turning to glare at a laughing Harry.

"You are to brilliant to be that oblivious." Harry offered unable to stop grinning as he shook his head at her.

"Hush Harry." Lily admonished him, "They'll figure things out eventually, your father and I did."

"Seven years later." Harry offered with a snort but at her glare he held up his hands and got up, "I'm going." He told them, needlessly as he went off to find James and Sirius.

At her confused frown Lily chuckled, "Honestly Mya, you can be so willfully blind."

"About Severus?" She frowned at her friend and looked to him, "We are just friends aren't we? I mean I know you maybe aren't in love with Lily anymore but you aren't in love with me are you?"

"Glad the prospect thrills you so much." He offered sarcastically, "Thankfully no. While I love you and Lily both, very much, I am no longer completely in love with her nor have I fallen madly in love with you. I am quite contentedly _not_ in love."

"You will be." Hermione smiled at him, "One day, you'll find an amazing witch and fall madly in love with each other. Lily and I will have to learn to share you then."

"Yes well, be that as it may be or not in future, currently I am happy how things are, with my life and my family as it is. You on the other hand are simply being a dunderhead. Willfully obtuse or woefully ignorant, I don't know but honestly you two are the only two who don't seem to grasp the reality of the situation and forgone conclusion. I expect, being only slightly less stubborn than Lily and him, being the opposite of Potters insistent pursuit, it may, without outside encouragement, take much longer than their seven year courtship."

She just glared at him in confusion.

"I wasn't the only one to have feelings for you in Hogwarts Mya." Remus offered, "It is one reason it took me so long to express my feelings."

"You mean Sirius?" She frowned, "I know he had a crush on me back then."

Lily snorted, "I _told_ you he liked you."

"Fine." Hermione rolled her eyes, "_Lily_ told me you both had feelings for me. I wasn't sure how _I_ felt at the time, about anything."

"Hermione." Severus lifted a hand to her throat to finger her necklace, "Do you know what this is?"

"A necklace," She rolled her eyes at him, "I told you, Sirius gave it to me to protect me from nightmares."

Severus snorted and rolled his eyes at her, "This charm, is only made by very powerful magic, it's imbued the with a part of the wizard and can only be created through the truest love which is how he was able to use it to know when darkness filled you causing those shared nightmares or when one of those nightmares came back to life and took us both prisoner."

Hermione frowned lifting her hand to the necklace she'd never taken off, not once since the Christmas morning he'd given it to her.

_"I wouldn't have let you out of my sight."_ His words came back to her from Gringotts. If she'd taken off the necklace he wouldn't have let her out of his sight, that's what he said. He'd given it to her to protect her from her nightmares, what had the note said? She fought to remember. Shaking her head she got up and grabbed the picture from the shelf, next to the one he'd drawn for Lily. Flipping it over she read the tag, _To keep you safe from nightmares and remind you, love can light the way through any dark. I'll always be there to chase away the darkest night and welcome the dawn with you._ Hermione licked her lips and read it again, "Love can light the way through any dark, I'll be there to chase away the darkest night." She whispered looking over to Lily with a frown.

"What?" She asked.

"You never read this? When we unpacked or anything?"

"Read what?" She asked getting up and coming over to frown at it.

"The note." Hermione persisted, "My necklace was in a box taped to it on the back here."

"I never saw a note." Lily told her frowning at the back, "It must have fallen off unpacking, we can try to find it, I'm sure it's not a big deal though, it's not like you lost the picture."

Hermione shook her head, "It's there." She frowned and reread the words, "You don't see it?"

"No." Lily told her, shaking her head.

"I think it's saying he loves me, I think he told me he loved me, three years ago." Hermione shook her head in shock.

"Mya?" Lily touched her arm after a long moment of silence.

"To keep you safe from nightmares and remind you, love can light the way through any dark. I'll always be there to chase away the darkest night and welcome the dawn with you." She read it out, she turned to Lily, "Love lights the way and he'll bring me that light, that's what it says, right?"

Lily smiled and nodded, "It sounds like it."

Hermione looked from Remus to Severus, "He was in love with me? Is in love with me?"

"Is, was and probably always will be." Remus confirmed.

"You love him too." Severus pointed out. She sent him a glare and he shrugged, "As it has taken three years for you both to accept he loves you, I can only imagine it might take as long for you and he to come to the same conclusion in regards to your feelings and I have no intention of watching such a painful courtship continue without the help you both clearly require."

"He means you love him, he loves you, admit it accept it and move on." Remus supplied, "We all have." Hermione stared at him in surprise not sure what to say, "Honestly Hermione, I do still love you but in the way I love him, or maybe more like in the way Severus loves Lily. I'm fine with it. More than fine, I'm happy for you. Seeing you with me sort of shattered him, I didn't know it for a long time, but, it broke him Mya and he's never really healed, so I'll be thrilled for him if he finally gets his girl."

Hermione nodded and looked down at the note again before flipping it over to look at the beautiful drawn sketch, every detail meticulously drawn and perfect as she sat looking out over the black lake, Padfoot's head in her lap and she rubbed his ear in the early pre-dawn light.

Turning she left the room without another word, the picture still in her hand she went to his room and walked in without knocking.


	32. Chapter 32

Sirius was sprawled on his bed, James sitting against the footboard legs over the other man. Harry was in the chair, which was strewn with clothes, flicking through a sketchbook abandoned by Sirius as some point and kicked under the chair or covered in the pile of clothes Harry had sat on, and thus found.

"How could you tell a girl you loved her in some coded note on a Christmas present and never let on about it!" Hermione demanded.

"He what? Harry laughed.

Hermione sent him a glare and Harry stood, "I'm guessing that is another cue for me to leave, come on Pops, let's go for a broom race." He tossed the sketch book on the bed, it lay open next to Sirius, a rough sketch picture of Hermione reading revealed before Sirius slammed it shut and tossed it back across the room. The book landed, open on another page, Hermione stirring a cauldron.

James chuckled and stood up, "You might be the newer version of me son but I am the original _and_ I'm younger so I'll teach you a thing or two as I fly circles around you."

"Yeah right, you fly circles and I'll do laps through them." The two of them slammed the door as they left.

After a moment Hermione growled, "Say something!" She finally snapped at the prone form on the bed.

"What?" He snapped sitting up and glaring at her, "What should I say Mya? That I met the love of my pitiful existence and fucked it up? That I nearly got her killed? That I chose to trust some slimy back-stabbing bastard over her instincts because my best friend asked me to and because my brother, who'd been my enemy for years stood behind her? Yes, I loved you, am in love with you and I know I fucked up, from the start, you don't have to tell me but everything I did was me trying to be the good guy, trying to do the right thing! Including watching you fall in love with my best mate and stepping aside. Now after I betrayed you and shoved you into the arms of another best mate and you fell in love with him, I'm trying to do the right thing again and suck it up! But my heart is shattered in a thousand pieces and my lungs have been ripped out of my chest and" Hermione had walked over to the bed and at this point she slapped the raging wizard.

His mouth snapped shut and he stared at her in shock.

"Why didn't you tell me in Hogwarts?" She glared, "In a clear one sentence response."

"You were to broken, you needed time to heal and I knew I had to give it to you."

"What about when you gave me this?" She held up the sketch, "You gave me all that love and didn't say anything."

"Gave, Mya I gave you something but I couldn't take anything in return, you didn't have it to give, you weren't ready."

"After Hogwarts?"

"I watched you heal, that year and I watched you fall for Remus, watched him fall in love with you and he was so much better than me, so much kinder and gentler and good. He deserved a woman like you, the woman he loved and who was falling in love with him back."

"Sirius." She sighed.

"I watched you fall in love with him that first year and it killed me, I drank and I slept around and I did everything I possibly could to get over that pain. Another year went by, that one was easier, seeing you heal, seeing you happy, both of you, being part of that." He nodded, "It was what you needed, he was what you wanted and you deserved that happiness, you both did."

"Since we broke up?"

"You broke my best friend's heart, how could I hurt him more by moving in on you?" Sirius returned, "Besides, you broke your own heart that day too, you needed time. Then you showed up with Regulus and I fucked up. I missed you so much those months, I thought I'd die from it, seeing you with Remus hurt but at least I saw you, was part of your life, your family. I knew you'd fall in love with him, Sev I mean, you and he had something more than friendship from the start, I hated him a little for it, was afraid he'd hurt you when you were so fragile. No one seemed to understand how fragile you were. Except he did, he gave you what I should have, he stood by your side above anyone else, above even Lily. Of course you'd love him." Sirius ran a hand through his hair and flopped back onto the bed, "Tell me Mya, how did I fuck up so badly? I've been lying here the last few minutes, maybe the last few years, trying to sort it out. All I every wanted was to let you heal, to be there for you so you could. To love you and be unselfish and good and give you anything you needed, to make you happy and safe and loved."

Hermione set the framed sketch gently on his night table and crawled onto bed with him, curling into him, "You did make me all of those things Sirius." She whispered.

"No." He whispered back, turning on his side to face her, "I just stepped back so Remus could and now Severus will and I love you enough to do that, love them enough to try to be happy for them about it."

"No Sirius." She moved her hand to his chest, clutching the shirt in her little fist. "You sat with me every dawn to chase away lingering nightmares, to fight back the darkness that wanted to grow in my heart. You helped me to heal and to trust. They only all loved me because you did first, you gave us this family Sirius and you hold us all together." He nodded and she used her grip on his shirt to pull her body closer to his "I do love Remy, I always will but I couldn't marry him, I was so afraid he was going to ask and so relieved when he hadn't, but he was going to and I knew, I could never say yes, could never love him like that. Like I loved you."

Sirius jerked back and frowned down at her, "You loved me?"

"I love you." She corrects him, "You have no idea how my heart broke that day, I wanted so badly to save him, to give you back your brother and I couldn't. I tried so hard and he was, he was prejudiced but he was funny and kind and smart and I liked him, in the end, I still wanted to strangle him half the time but he was your little brother, my little brother." She bit back tears, "I'm sorry I couldn't save him."

Sirius pulled her tight into his arms, "It was my fault Mya. Regulus, them getting you, it was my fault." He hugged her tighter to him, "I swear I never told a soul where you were, I'd never have trusted anyone with that, not with you. I should never have let you leave our house, our home, I should have told Peter he had to stay somewhere else, I should have stood with you, I was just so thrown by Reg being there. Everything went wrong, it went so wrong and I should have gone with you, I should have never let you leave here."

"It's ok Sirius. It hurt, you choosing James over me, but I knew you didn't mean it that way, I knew you were scared for all of us and you didn't know how to trust Reg."

"I should have trusted you."

"Sirius." Hermione pulled back a little to look up at him, "It's ok now, it's ok, we both made mistakes but I love you, I loved you from the start," she snorted a quiet huff, "I loved the broken man I met at thirteen, I just didn't know it. I loved the Marauder from Hogwarts long before I was ready to see it. I was so blind Sirius, you told me you loved me that first Christmas and you've shown me time and again since but I was so blind. To how you felt, even to how I felt but I loved you too, I love you."

Sirius hugged her tightly, "What about Sev?"

She chuckled into his chest and kissed over her heart, "I love him to, but not like I love you, I'll never love anyone like I love you. Sev knew that before I did. " Sirius chuckled and held her, not really able to believe any of this. "Sirius?" She whispered after a while.

"Hmmm."

"Never let me go again ok?"

"Kitten, I might never let you out of this bed again." He muttered making her chuckle.

"Sirius?"

"What?"

"You haven't kissed me yet."

Sirius finally loosened his grip and pulled back frowning and grinning, "I definitely better fix that." He informed her leaning in to kiss her gently, nudging her onto her back as he did do he was hovering over her and had better access. He deepened the kiss right away, exploring and tasting as passion ignited like fire in them both. Sirius felt an odd mix of this amazing content feeling just to kiss her, making him think he'd be happy to lay like this and kiss her forever and wanting to make love to her so badly his whole body was screaming for her. When she shifted tugging him more on top of her and then wrapped her legs around his hips, he was lost. Taking it slow was a concept as quickly discarded as her clothes.

The next day they visited the graves of the wizards and witches who'd died at the Great Battle. There was a statue with all the names and Hermione counted thirteen in sad remembrance, her heart aching at the few names of people she knew personally but at the end of the thirteenth name she smiled. Thirteen witches and wizards in one battle to end a war that had begun slowly over ten years, thirteen witches and wizards on the memorial for the light instead of three hundred, three thousand once you included the other memorials, the other graveyards across Europe. No, this time, it was one memorial, from one battle, with thirteen names. Three of them people she'd been unable to save and it still broke her heart, Frank Longbottom, Andromeda Tonks and Regulus Black.

Sirius pulled his witch into his arms, trying to comfort her. She'd not been able to save them all and he knew she understood that she couldn't have but he also knew she couldn't quite forgive herself for not saving his brother. Silently he sent a silent plea of forgiveness to him, for not believing in him, for not believing in her and being their to protect them both. He held her against his chest as they both looked out at the memorial, her back against his chest he leant down to kiss her temple, "Marry me Mya." He whispered to her, "I don't want to wait, to waste a single moment of our life together."

"Yes." She turned into his arms, tears in her eyes, for the dead, for the past and for the future she was blessed to have.

Though it was fast, having only really gotten together the night before, they both knew it was right and there wasn't a doubt in either of their hearts that this was a rare love that would last a life time. Their friends all knew it too and were quick to help them arrange a small ceremony in the woods shared by just the seven of them, nine days later.

Sirius grinned, tears stinging his eyes as she came into view in the small field, Harry leading her slowly to him. She was so beautiful it actually physically hurt him to watch her moving towards him. She slid easily from Harry's arm and into his, "Kitten." Was all he could manage to choke out.

She nodded and smiled in reply, not quite able to speak past the lump in her throat as she fought the tears in her eyes from falling. It was a losing battle as the ceremony began and they had to speak their vows, swearing their lives and hearts together to share in whatever adventure the future took them on, to stand by each other above all others to meet each new dawn together, chasing away the dark with the light of their love.

As it came time to kiss his bride, Sirius pulled his witch into his arms, he closed his eyes and thanked Merlin for a new loop in time, for saving them all but mostly for bringing this amazing witch to him to love for all the days of his life and beyond.


End file.
